Morning sunshine strikes after a heavy storm last night. I can see dewy grass and leaves outside my room. It's like a scatter of diamonds on a fluffy green carpet. Ethereal and smoochy.
After a morning shower and some skincare routine, I lightly run to the kitchen to prepare breakfast. My feet halt when I see a figure behind the counter. His hand is busy with a frying pan and a small pot on the stove.
"Morning?" my mind is in the puzzle. I thought he left the house yesterday. He never stayed because he always thought it was dangerous for us to be alone.
"Oh, morning. Are you ready for breakfast?"
"Yeah. I'm starving..." I pull a chair and sit patiently, waiting for a meal shamelessly.
Khittan puts a plate of breakfast along with a mug of coffee in front of me. He grabs himself a plate and a glass of green juice.
"Dig in," he invites me. I slowly pick up my fork and eat. My eyes subtly glared at him from time to time.
I was gonna ask him about the kiss. But, he seems too lax and I feel like perhaps he forgot about it. I want to ask him the reason. However, words stuck in my throat.
"What's the plan for today?" he asks me out of the blue.
"I saw two helmets in the foyer. Do they belong to you?" I ask.
"Oh, one belongs to me. The other belongs to no one. I bought it just in case I have a passenger," he replies.
"Uwu... Like a girlfriend?" I tease him a bit, chuckling while giving him a naughty gaze.
"Why? Are you jealous?" he graze upon me.
"Jea- what? I have no reason to... I mean, who doesn't wanna date the crown prince?"
"You,"
I almost spur my coffee. Jeez, this man knows how to drop a bomb!
"Make an exception for me. I married you thrice in my previous life. Let's just say I'm totally over you," says me, slowly ascending from the chair and straight to the sink.
"I prefer dating someone who I feel comfortable the most. The one who knows me well. So, there won't be any awkward situation between us," he slowly leaned closer, towering over me with his height.
"Everything about you is awkward the first time I met you," I roll my eyes up. Khittan laughs in tiny. Perhaps recall some memories.
"But, when I told you about the feeling of comfort, I do mean it. I'm comfortable around you,"
I feel like my heart stops beating for a second.
"Dude, you do realize that I'm scared the hell of my mind when I'm around you. Maybe a bit hangry as well?" I push him aside a bit to make room for me to pass by.
"Hangry?"
"Angry and hungry. I'm constantly hungry,"
He chuckles and shakes his head in tiny.
"What about now?" he asks.
"Now? Hmmm..." I turn around and study him a bit.
"You stare a little bit too much, ma'am..."
"You got issues for that?" I playfully snarkily glare at Khittan. He scoffs as he slowly closes the gap between us.
"I'm afraid that I might knock someone for good," he replies as he slams his hands on my shoulder. He leaned closer towards me, faces too close to each other.
"Now, did you get a good view?" he whispers, raises a question.
"Too much..." I put my pointy finger against his forehead and pushed Khittan away from me. He playfully chased me from behind when he saw me leaving the kitchen.
Talking about plans...
I enter the foyer, gazing my sights at the two helmets on the cupboard.
"Do you have the ride?" I ask Khittan when I notice he already getting closer to me.
"Yeah..."
"Right here? At this very house?"
"Yeah..."
"Can I see them?"
:::
Khittan pushes the red button. We're right in front of a garage, a bit separate from the main garage. It's a small garage compared to the main garage.
The door is open and from my spot, I notice a blue Yamaha R6 and a black Ducati 916 park beautifully inside there.
"Wow...."
"That R6 belongs to my little brother. I own this..." Khittan taps his palm on the throttle. "He practicing using this bike..."
"Why not the same model?"
"He's small and still young. He's 17,"
"17-year-old youngsters nowadays are bulkier and huge compared to your era, sire..."
"That R6 is enough for him. He can upgrade that later," I can sense a concern in his voice. He must be afraid to let a teen ride such humongous machinery.
"You got the key?" I ask.
"Here..." he shows me the keys. I raise my eyebrows.
Slowly, I walk towards him and snatch the R6 key from him. He grabs my wrist and stops me from stealing the key.
"What are you doing?"
"Doing what? Ride this, of course!"
"Do you know how to?" he watches me in puzzle. I snicker and smile at him.
"Sire, you wanna go for a race?" I don the helmet over my head, push the key into the ignition, and start the bike. Khittan watches me, looking impressive.
I position myself well on the bike, playing with the throttle a bit for a warm-up. After I checked over everything; the gas meter and the system, I pushed the gear with my feet, slowly let go of the clutch, and rolled the throttle.
I take some time to wander around the front compound of the mansion, showing my skill to Khittan before stops the bike right in front of him.
"So?" I playfully smile at Khittan. He chuckles and nods a bit.
"Let's go for a ride."
:::
We reside at the top of a cliff. The ride takes about one hour from the mansion. The wind is quiet and breezy. Cloud painted the sky like Picasso. It's magical.
"I used to come here after a ride, either with Hathim or just myself," says Khittan.
"Best view for VIPs..."
"This view is for the public,"
"You think the public can find this place?" Khittan chuckles. Later, those laughs faded away.
"I think we should talk about yesterday,"
"You mean, the kiss?"
He glared at me with a gloomy expression. I held a deep sigh. I guess it's not only me then. He wants to talk about it as well.
"It wasn't supposed to happen. I'm sorry for crossing the line," he says.
I nod. To be honest, I never expected this kind of answer. He is calm, and chill. And I don't know, deep down inside I wish he could just admit that he wants the kiss. I can't read him and his thoughts. Everything is heavy for me.
"Maybe we got caught in the closeness that we have had for the past few days together. I guess so..." I watch his expression, just to read his mind.
"Hmm.. Sometimes closeness can be mixed up with heavy feelings..."
"Like falling in love?"
He halts. A few minutes later, he casually leans against his bike.
"Can I be honest?" he asks.
"Sure! Why not?"
Khittan slowly stepped towards me. He stands facing me and looks straight into my eyes.
"If you ask me, I'll definitely and surely be in love with you. The real issue right now is, are we having mutual feelings?" he slowly tilts his head and stares at me. "Seems like we're not," he gives an immediate response even before I reply to him.
"Things are complex between us, Khit,"
"I know. Seems like I'm dancing alone..."
Khittan laughs a bit.
"I'm dancing by myself too,"
"How? I mean, you got Jun Seo..."
"He might be sharing the same feeling as you. I never say anything, not even answer his proposal. Things are fuck up between us. I do like him or perhaps love him. But, I don't wanna mix up the context of closeness and intimacy with love. It's unfair for him," Finally I can be honest with my feelings. All this time I kept everything inside, getting confused all the time and causing trouble.
"Maybe you're afraid of the spotlight and attention," I know Khittan is trying to drive me back to lane. But that's useless.
"I hate that. Yes, I do. But, I don't think that's the main reason. I don't know. I'm not sure,"
We both now looking at the sky together.
"I hope we can discover happiness soon," I say.
"Yeah. I hope for the same. The future is indefinite. But, I like the current us..."
We both exchange glares.
"And I hope it will last forever..."