I stood there, too stunned to speak. The fan that I held slowly slipped through my grip. Tears slowly rolling from my eyes.
"What did you say?" I asked my maid one more time.
"You're now engaged to The Crown Prince! Congratulations, Miss!" I looked at the face of a girl who helped me all this time, from when I was still a child, until now.
"No!" I sternly denied the fact. Living in denial. My heart stopped. I yelped a bit and held my chest. It hurts. So bad. Truly.
"Miss?" I couldn't hear any sounds near me anymore. I stormed out of my room, leaving everything behind. I ran with all my might, chasing what was ahead of me.
Destination: My Father's Room.
I pushed the door open. Here he was, talking cheerfully with my mother.
"What did you do? Why are you doing this to me, Father?!" I asked him, holding his robe, like a maniac. I cried and bantered like crazy.
He pushed me away from him. I slammed on the floor. Mother tried to help me, but he stopped her. I stared at him, sobbing hard.
"You should be grateful for the proposal! He is The Crown Prince!"
"I don't wanna marry him, please Father! I don't wanna get married!"
"I brought you to this world so you can be my beneficial factor! You don't know how much I spend on you? You don't, right?! So, now it's time to repay your debt to me. As a daughter, all you have to do is listen and obey!" it's like being hit by a bullet. Those words. It is hurtful. So much so that I choose to die instead of living and facing this world!
"How can you say that to me, Father? Am I not your child?"
"You're mine. That's why you need to obey!"
"Is it because I'm a girl? Is that so? You never force The Eldest Brother. He can do whatever he wants. The Second Brother, you never punish him for his wrongdoings, yet you said it's normal for a man to sleep around like a dog. Me?" I stood up, grabbed his robe, and pulled him closer so he faced me. "Am I not your child? Am I a cow that you simply sell, just like that?! What am I to you, Father? Tell me. Tell me!!"
Slap!
I don't need to wait for the answer. I got it. It's crystal clear. No need for more explanation. Everything has been confirmed.
I stormed out of the room that felt like nothing but Hell to me. I have no value, not in there, not in the house. I'm nothing but a pawn. Unwanted child that never loved by her parents.
If that's what you want, Father!
Your wish is my command!
:::
I don't know. Why time feel like stuck in a place whenever I look at his face? It's like a loop that circles me, then it stops.
"Let's cut this short. What do you want?" I bluntly ask him while sipping my coffee. He twirls his half-finished coffee, looking down as he tries to collect words to answer my question.
Then, he raises his head and faces me, staring deep into my eyes.
"I'm your future husband,"
I spur the coffee from my mouth. Quickly, he grabs the napkin and hands it to me. I feel like dying now! What the fuck does he say?! I dab my lips with the napkin.
"Sorry for the impolite gesture. But, excuse me? Come again?" I half yelled at him. What's the most annoying part is, that he remains calm in his seat, facing me. I mean, does he have feelings or not?
Excuse me sir, but don't you feel at least skeptical about this??
"I happened to know from a source that my family had decided to let me marry a lady from the House of Sun. Come to know that the lady is the daughter of General Sun himself."
Lady Karin of The House of Sun.
Yes, that's me.
"Unfortunately, I have no chance to meet her, let alone court her before the engagement. So, I asked my assistant to check on your background. Dig deeper than what I know," he sips his coffee in poise. "And, here I am, meeting my future wife for the first time," he says.
"Please stop addressing me like that. It sounds so..."
"Distasteful?"
"I'll vomit if you go further," I say. He scoffs as he stares at me. I duck back my head a bit, giving him the most disgusting reaction ever.
"You seem... Different," he says.
"I won't change myself just because you know that I'm a royalty. I won't act demure or ladylike out of the blue. I'm not a lamp that has a switch to change my attitude in the blink of an eye," I say. "I am who I am. Take it or leave it," I don't mind speaking my mind. Besides, to let my guard down, that's a wrong move.
I don't know him. He is still a danger to me.
"Warning noted," he says. Suddenly, he draws a smile on his face.
"What?"
"Nothing..." he looks away. I was still in awkwardness while trying to process the information given to him. I look at his eyes. The image of a man from my nightmare reappears right in front of my eyes.
"Ouch!" my fingers slip and the hot coffee splashes from the cup, burning my thumb. He quickly grabs my hand and blows it. I pull my hand immediately from him. But he insists on holding it, blowing the sting from the burnt.
My heart stops. At least, I feel like my heart stops beating. If it stops for real, I might be dead because of the cardiac arrest! My dramatic thoughts stirred my mind like crazy.
Michin deusi!
"Your hand smells like mint,"
I pull my hand, this time strong enough to escape from his grip. He let me go, although I could see the disappointment on his face.
"Just because I'm your future wife, doesn't mean you can touch me like that. I don't know you. I never say yes to this, too," I clarify my decision.
"What about the man that helped you yesterday?"
"Jun Seo?"
"He can touch you. He even hugged you-"
"Jun's different,"
"Is he your husband? Your fiancee? Your boyfriend?"
"It's none of your business!"
"I'm your fiancee, and you said I have no right to touch you. But you just told me that HE has your permission? Who is he anyway?"
"Speaks ill about him, I'm gonna banish you out from my cafe!" I started losing my temper.
"I'm just claiming what's mine."
"I am no one's belonging!" I banter.
"I think you do realize that we're engaged to be married soon. I am someone who your family knew. Does your family know Jun Seo?" he asks.
"Let me just be honest. There will be no wedding. There is no engagement. I have my life. I have my right to say no. So, please stop all of this bullshit! Go back to where you belong. Just leave me alone," this is my last straw. I had enough of this! I am so done!
"I'm sorry if I ruined your day," he stands up. Fixing his suits, he takes out something from his purse. "And, I'm sorry to tell you that this is not our last meeting. We'll get in touch again soon. This is my card. Thanks for your time," he says.
I didn't take the card immediately. My eyes were still locked with his. He stares at me. Too much staring, must be boring, aye? But, his sight is full of... Emotion? Uncertainty. Not confusing but something did hold him back.
"You know, I can do this over and over again," he says.
"What do you mean?" I ask him back.
"I can marry you, again and again..." he whispers to my ears.
My eyes almost pop out of the socket.
He stares at me again, tilting his head and giving me a strange glare.
"You're my destiny... My wife..."
Wait. Where is my heart? Where am I? Does anyone see the soul of a girl wandering around the street?
He steps back and gives me a little smirk. As he left the cafe, I stood there like a stone, unable to move. What just happened? Why am I feeling like living and dying at the same time?
I look at the card in my hand.
Gasp!
The writing is clear. So damn crystal clear!
The Royal Highness Prince Kit Than Houlsey, The Crown Prince of Fransco. The Royal House of Grey Houlsey.