"Lord Qiao, are you angry?"
"Lord Qiao, it's eleven o'clock at night, time to rest."
"Lord Qiao, your mood seems to be changing quite dramatically..."
"Lord Qiao, getting angry is bad for your health, it can lead to sudden death, and it's likely to cause pigmentation, affecting your appearance and sexual performance..."
By the side of the room's sofa, a small robot about fifty centimeters tall is dressed in a spacesuit, resembling a little astronaut but in a pet version, gazing at Qiao Dongyang with a pair of cute, big eyes, its large head adorably turning, exuding a robotic texture that looks quite cool.
However...
It had annoyed Qiao Dongyang.
His face darkened, "Shut up!"
"Sure, Lord Qiao. Please give me your voice commands..."
"Do you have a death wish?"
"—" The little robot stretched its short legs and made a helpless gesture with its hands, "Lord Qiao looks so handsome when he's angry! Tengu really likes Lord Qiao. Goodbye, Lord Qiao!"
Wave wave~
The little robot quieted down.
It was the latest top-tier AI robot developed by Crown Corporation, equipped with self-judgment and predictive analytics. One could say it was a very mature AI "child".
Hmph! Qiao Dongyang turned to face Zheng Xiyuan, who was staring in astonishment.
"Aren't you going to bring the stuff in?"
"Oh..." Cautious, Zheng Xiyuan set a box on the coffee table, and his gaze fell again on the cute robot named "Tengu" by the sofa, sighing in resignation, "You have it easy, getting by on bootlicking. Unlike me, who, despite good intentions, ends up accused of malice..."
"Zheng Xiyuan!" Qiao Dongyang cut him off.
Sitting on the sofa, he casually crossed his arms and legs, yet his eyes were cold.
"Unpack everything!"
"Ah?" Zheng Xiyuan was clearly surprised, pointing first at himself, then at Qiao Dongyang, and finally at the large box brought by Chi Yue, "It's just you and me here... Are we really supposed to unpack this?"
"Unpack." Qiao Dongyang affirmed once more.
"..."
Zheng Xiyuan felt a chill down there.
He opened the packaging with his head down, frequently looking up at Qiao Dongyang.
"You want to use these?"
"You want to use them."
"..."
Zheng Xiyuan's face grew even more uncomfortable.
"Cousin..."
"Who's your cousin?"
"Cousin!"
"Who's your cousin?"
"Aren't we distant relatives who have just removed the fifth degree of mourning? A hundred years ago, we were definitely one family. Qiao, stop torturing me. I was wrong—I won't dare again." Zheng Xiyuan sighed and simply dropped the weirdly shaped packaging boxes he was holding, straightening up, "I might as well confess everything, that night's incident... was orchestrated by our aunt."
Qiao Dongyang looked at him coldly.
Zheng Xiyuan tugged at his clothes and cleared his throat, "…I slept with the daughter of a big uncle of a friend of my aunt and she caught me by the short hairs. If I don't help her, my dad will exile me to the borderlands, my dear brother—"
Qiao Dongyang's face was expressionless, his eyes coldly sweeping over Zheng Xiyuan, who immediately acted more respectfully.
"Sigh! I know you're very angry. I shouldn't have been weak-willed and joined forces with the enemy. But to err is human, to forgive, divine. I've already admitted my mistake, please let me off?"
"What do you think I had you bring all these things back for?" Qiao Dongyang looked at the cardboard box, his expression unchanged.
Zheng Xiyuan didn't catch on for quite a while.
"…Isn't it to punish me?"
"Cough cough cough cough!"
Qiao Dongyang coughed violently.
A swift kick landed squarely on Zheng Xiyuan's sensitive spot.
Zheng Xiyuan yelped and crouched down, clutching his groin, "Come on! If you want to play, play, but don't abuse me!"
A faint smile appeared on Qiao Dongyang's cool face, chilling.
"Alright, since you're so keen, let's play then."
"Ah? For real! Brother, don't scare me..."
"Tengu!" Qiao Dongyang called out to the side, and the little robot Tengu, which had been in silent mode, "reawakened" cheerfully. It moved its legs excitedly and slowly walked over, producing a robotic voice, "Lord Qiao, please command me as you wish."
Qiao Dongyang pointed to the box full of sexual wellness products, "Make Zheng Xiyuan use all of these, don't leave a single one out. You hear me?"
"Sure thing, Lord Qiao." Tengu was very receptive and seemed to grasp that his master had other intentions; he quickly made the most suitable suggestion, "Lord Qiao, since you don't like women, I will arrange 100G on the tablet for you right away, so you can enjoy yourself tonight, but it's best not to continue for more than forty minutes to avoid harming your health."
"…"
Qiao Dongyang bent over and pointed at its head.
"Do you want to die?"
"If I die, you'll be sad, Lord Qiao."
"Do you believe I will have you remade?"
"Lord Qiao, I wasn't made in a furnace, I'm the dear son of a programmer..."
The earnest little Tengu, its eyes emitting a soft blue light.
"—" Qiao Dongyang couldn't help but laugh and cry, took a deep breath, and pointed at Zheng Xiyuan, who was eagerly watching from the sofa, "Explain to Tengu all the features of these products, including your insights, experiences, and deeper emotional needs. Tengu will record it accurately. When we develop the next generation of companion robots, we can use your data as a reference..."
"Ah!?"
Zheng Xiyuan was stupefied.
"Lord Qiao!"
Tengu seemed stupefied too, its big head turning.
"I'm still a baby!"
…