Demyan
Sitting next to Ethan was not as overwhelming as I thought it would be. There were no jittery nerves, no anxious sweating or constant bouncing of my knees. It felt as familiar as sitting next to a childhood friend, someone you had known for your whole life and were simply reconnecting.
I thought I would resent him. That I would hate him just as much as I did when I last saw him in the parking of his penthouse as he begged me to stay. It felt so far away now. As if it was a memory I had looked at and turned over and over again in my hands until I could not anymore.
I had relived the pain of seeing him in someone else's arms so many times that I had become numb but I went through it. I faced it and I believed that was what allowed me to let it go. That at the end of the day he needed more, he wanted more and I just was not able to give it to him. I could not be his perfect Demy and I was alright with that.
