I'M THE only child in my family by choice, meaning mom and dad decided not to have another baby. Cause Mommy's body changes when she has me, she gains weight and she says those times are the ugliest look she ever has, and the idea of having a baby, gaining weight, and becoming ugly again disgust her.

It's so hard being an only child of the family, Since I was a child my life is always controlled by my mom.

My mom is a very sophisticated, Elegant and Perfectionist kind of person, For her there is no room for failure.

She always wanted to make sure that everything was perfect including Me.

Every action I make I should always make sure that it was all according to her will.

She always easily got mad at me if I did something she doesn't like. Like for example. Sitting in the wrong way, eating too much, or having a grade lower than 90

I need to sit like I'm a part of that royal blood, sit back straight, chin up, cross legs, and always make sure that your back will not lean on the chair.

I'm not allowed to eat too much, mom said it's disgusting for a woman to be fat, no man will love me and accept me.

I need to have more than 90% of my grade, cause she's hoping for me to enter Harvard University next year at my College.

I'm the only child in my family by choice, meaning mom and dad decided not to have another baby cause it's hard to have a child.

She's either the one who chooses my friend now , cause the last time I chose my circle of friends, she got mad at me and said that I'm dumb to choose those kinds of friends.

I get to be friended to 7 people, 4 of my friends came from poor family, they are just a scholar in University. 3 of them came from a good background, but two of them have broken family, and one of them are said to be a illegitimate daughter of congressman.

They didn't meet mom's high standard. Mom hates them, she said that they are not good friends and said that they are a bad influence on me, She ordered me to stay away from them so, I did, even though it's hard for me to do so.

But my friends refuse to unfriend me, when mom learn about this, she confront them and she called names like' Bitch, Slut, Bastard, Worthless, Dickhead, asshole, Gold Digger and many more'. that attitude of my mom didn't sit on my former friends, they eventually distance their selves to me.

I got hurt in the process, but I always remind myself that mom is just doing this for my own good, and she will not do anything that bad for me.

She chose my friend to be someone who has a good background, a person like her sophisticated, elegant and perfect.

That's the reason why I don't have friends. Because NO one passes on her standard.

I'm never against her. Never. I'm like a robot who does everything she says, and never disobeys her order....But, Not until I meet Clevin.

Clevin is the bravest person I ever met, I Wanted to be someone like him, he always come out in his comfort zone, trying new things, his not afraid to make mistake, for him mistake is a new experience in life, he has a motto 'Take chances, make mistakes. That's how you grow." (Mary Tyler Moor).

When I met everything changed, He gave me strength to go out of my comfort zone, making new things and not to be afraid of everything, voicing out my opinion and all, my mom starting to notice my changes, and she hates it.

I actually felt bad when I did something that I knew my mom would oppose. But when I'm with Clevin everything falls right.

And meeting him at that birthday party was the good thing that happened into my life.... or that's what I think. Not until he ABANDONED ME.