Walking away felt like a retreat from a battlefield of emotions that had left me utterly shattered. Each step I took was laden with the weight of my pain, and my footsteps echoed like the hollow thuds of a defeated heart. Amidst the raucous applause and the excited chatter of the crowd, a maelstrom of confusion raged within me, drowning out any semblance of clarity.
The world seemed to blur around me as I continued to distance myself from him, taking backward steps that mirrored the retreat of my shattered hopes. The cacophony of the audience's cheers clashed harshly with the turmoil raging inside me, a dissonant symphony that underscored my heartache.
Walking out on the finale of LOVESTRUCK was uncharted territory, a decision that felt like a surrender – not just of the competition, but of a part of myself. As the sound of my own footsteps reverberated in my ears, it was as if I was abandoning my dreams, my desires, and the connection I had felt with him.
The applause and cheers from the audience blended into an overwhelming cacophony, a tumultuous reminder of my decision's audacity. Amidst their surprise, I could almost taste the bitterness of disappointment, both in myself and in their unmet expectations. This was the kind of dramatic exit that would linger in the minds of everyone present, an unforgettable twist that would mark this finale as distinct from any other.
Walking away was a silent admission of defeat, a concession that I had been outplayed by circumstances beyond my control. It was a painful acknowledgement that the happiness I had longed for might forever remain just beyond my grasp. But what hurt the most was not the applause I was leaving behind, but the unfulfilled promises that lingered between us, now shattered and scattered like fragments of a broken mirror.
With each step I took, I could feel the memories of our time together resurfacing, each one a reminder of the love I had harbored, the hopes I had nurtured, and the moments I had cherished. The emotions swirling within me were a tempest of anguish, confusion, and longing, and they threatened to engulf me entirely.
As I left the stage behind, the tears that streamed down my face were the tears of a heart that had been fractured. I was a mosaic of vulnerability and hurt, the façade I had clung to now crumbling like a fragile illusion. The sobs that wracked my body were not just from the pain of walking away, but from the torment of unspoken words and shattered dreams.
Ron's voice calling my name and the concerned queries of the staff seemed distant, mere echoes in the backdrop of my agony. Each step I took further distanced me from the life I had known, from the connection that had once held the promise of a different future. The tears were my silent testament to the depth of my despair, each drop an unspoken elegy for what could have been.
In that moment, as I retreated from the spotlight, I was a portrait of anguish and vulnerability. The world around me was a blur of faces, lights, and noise, but within me, the pain was crystal clear. It was a pain that had no words, no consolation, and no easy remedy.
I wished for the darkness to swallow me whole, to provide an escape from the searing emotions that threatened to consume me. My heart was a canvas painted with hues of suffering, each brushstroke a testament to the agony I had tried to suppress for so long.
Walking away was a retreat, a surrender, a choice that I had never thought I would make. And as I disappeared from view, my tear-streaked face a stark contrast to the smiling façade I had worn, I was not just walking away from the stage – I was walking away from the shards of my broken heart, leaving them behind as a painful reminder of a love that had slipped through my fingers.
***
We reached Tagaytay, and the earlier uncontrollable sobs had tapered off. It was past eleven-thirty when the guy decided to make a pit stop at Starbucks Magallanes Tagaytay, conveniently located along Aguinaldo Highway.
"So, he knew, too," Carson began, his expression carrying a hint of sorrow as if he empathized with what I was going through.
"Yes, he knew that the show was also using me as bait to get my missing father to show up."
As he continued speaking, fragments of the puzzle started to fall into place in my mind, forming an enigmatic picture. I couldn't shake off the feeling that my father might have committed an offense that angered or provoked the Henarez family.
Carson took a deep breath, as if each exhale was a way to ease the heavy emotions he was carrying. I sensed that he had something significant to reveal.
"I hope you won't be too upset once I tell you this," he said cautiously.
"D—did my father do something terrible involving Rayden's family?"
Carson let out another deep sigh, his hand on the steering wheel revealing his unease. "Actually, he did, Sid. He did something terrible."
Just as I suspected, but hearing the news still managed to shock me to the core. My jaw dropped in instant reaction.
"He had a partnership with the Henarez Group of Companies. At first, the partnership was going smoothly, until your father went rogue, disappearing after taking a large sum of money."
"W—was he in financial trouble, or what was his motive?"
"He fell in love with another woman and ran away from the Henarez family, your mother, and you," he revealed, his lips twitching as if he regretted unearthing this information about my father. His eyes held an apologetic look that spoke volumes.
Carson's apologetic look was like a lifeline amidst a turbulent sea, a beacon of compassion reminding me that I wasn't alone in my pain. It was a reminder that in moments when words fell short, gestures and expressions could bridge hearts, allowing us to share each other's highs and lows.
As he withdrew his hand and gently squeezed my shoulder, his apologetic gaze conveyed an unspoken message of unwavering support and friendship. Amidst the storm of emotions within me, his presence offered a glimmer of solace, reminding me that I had someone by my side who cared deeply, even when words struggled to capture the depth of our feelings.
"That's why my mom ended her own life. She loved only him, and yet he betrayed her, cheated on her."
As the words hung in the air, my heart raced in my chest, each syllable hitting me like a wave of shock and dismay. The world around me dissolved into an indistinct backdrop, as if time had stopped. My gaze was locked on the person in front of me, their lips still moving, but the words were echoes in my ears.
Unpardonable sin. The words echoed in my head, each repetition forcing the truth deeper into my psyche. My father, the man I had looked up to, the man who had reared me, had done something so horrible, so morally repugnant, that it was deemed unforgivable.
"I'm sorry this happened to you, Sid."
Tears ran down my cheeks, each drop a tribute to the agony that seemed to emanate from the center of my being. I felt helpless and defenseless, as if the floodgates of my emotions had been shattered and there was no way to stop the stream of pain that spilled forth. My vision was distorted by the tears, which turned the scene outside into a watery canvas of muted hues and unclear shapes.
Carson's presence in the car beside me was a lifeline in the midst of my turmoil. His hand lingered lightly on my back, providing a steadying touch that brought me back to the present moment. His fingertips made calming patterns on my shoulder, a subtle confirmation that he was there - a rock of support in the midst of my emotional turmoil.
My breath came out in ragged gasps as I trembled with sobs, the weight of my anguish making it difficult to find any semblance of peace. The delicate fibers of a tissue crumpled under my hold as I clutched it in my fingers. I wiped away the tears, only for more to fall, as if the wellspring of my anguish was limitless.
Carson's smooth, comforting voice cut through the din of my thoughts. He spoke softly, his words soothing my broken heart. He provided no solutions or quick remedies, only a listening ear and a presence that provided peace in its silent comprehension.
His other hand stretched for mine, his fingers interlocking as though to anchor me to the reality that he was with me. His touch was soothing and anchoring, a lifeline in the midst of my mental storm. He imparted a sense of camaraderie, a shared moment of vulnerability that surpassed words, with a soft grip.
"I'll just go get us some coffee," he said when my sobbing had finally subsided.
The outside world was enveloped in a serene veil of fog. The man beside me remained quiet, perhaps waiting for the right moment to initiate a conversation.
"Maybe it's better if you stay here for now? You might be recognized by the people inside. Is that okay?"
"It's probably best if I stay in here. Coffee is a good idea, so please be quick. Just a pumpkin spice latte," I replied, managing a smile. The man's playful wink made my heart skip a beat before he spoke, "Pumpkin spice latte coming right up! Just stay here. Don't go anywhere."
Carson closed the passenger door, leaving me in the car. With his departure, I decided to read the messages on my cellphone that had been persistently buzzing. I couldn't explain why I suddenly felt a wave of nervousness washing over me.
My phone screen displayed ten missed calls from unknown numbers. I shrugged it off. It might be from someone at LOVESTRUCK.
I opened my text messages, searching for Rayden's name in my inbox. I wasn't disappointed; his message was there.
Rayden texted: Please wait for me. I love you.
A smile tugged at my lips as I read his message. Somehow, it managed to alleviate the heaviness in my chest. I typed a reply: I promise. I will.
I pressed the send button and glanced at my phone, ensuring that my message had been sent. Just as I was about to return my attention to the surroundings, my focus was abruptly seized by blinding headlights on the street.
The world around me seemed to freeze. The sound of tires screeching against the road echoed, followed by the blaring of horns. In that split second, I knew that something really, really bad was about to happen.
Stuck in my seat, I couldn't move. "Oh Lord!" escaped my lips, a solitary prayer in the face of impending danger.
Then, before I could utter another word, a forceful impact slammed into Carson's car. My head jerked from the force of the collision with the white car that had crashed into mine.
The shattering of glass began to reverberate in my ears. Fragments of glass pricked my skin, a precursor to the shattering of my world. The earth seemed to spin, and gravity lost its hold. I felt my body screaming, but my own voice was muffled, drowned out by the chaos.
And in the midst of the chaos, as darkness beckoned, I clung to one last thought—a promise I had sworn to fulfill.
Rayden...