My eyes automatically gaze upon the falling, burnt orange leaves as I raise my left arm to check the time. It's still 2:00 p.m., one more hour before my test starts. I gently massage my temples with my fingers in a circular motion as I feel the consequence of earning only two hours of sleep. I have been investing my time and energy for this exam, burning the midnight oil day and night. Since I am now in my senior year, there is no time for slacking off, not for people like me.
Good thing the weather today makes my dizziness a bit bearable. This is why I love autumn so much. It is like the perfect recipe for pasta—not too hot and not too cold. Anyway, a few meters away from me are the other benches, where students' eyes are glued to their books. As for me, I already gave my all last night. I know myself well enough that I will just mess everything up in my head if I review my notes one last time.
As a literature student, it is fun to dive into other people's stories, but it is equally draining to carry their burdens as well. Putting down a book and picking up another is something I can never do, as I always absorb the characters' experiences and emotions too deeply into my being. I feel like I am abandoning the lives of the last book if I move on to another one.
"Maddie!" a red-headed lady with a high-pitched voice exclaims from afar. It's my best friend, Nessa.
Her faint, tiny figure slowly zoomed in as she approached me.
"Why do you look so pale? Anyway, carry your butt now; that old professor suddenly got mad and said that the test would start 30 minutes earlier!" She pulls my arm, and I quickly reach for my things on the bench.
~~
"Last 30 minutes!" the proctor reminds.
I am down to the last few parts of this exam, but I've been feeling sick in my stomach for the past few minutes. It's not hunger since I already grabbed some snacks earlier.
"Hey, you fine?" Nessa asks, poking my shoulders.
I looked sideways to face her, which made me even more dizzy.
"Yeah, I think I'll just have to buy a bottle of water," I answer.
I raise my hand to catch the watcher's attention.
"Yes?" she responds.
"I--"
"She needs to drink some water since she feels unwell."
Oh, thanks, Nessa.
"Okay, just make sure to do it quickly," she says.
I nod and stand up, which, I've just now realized, is not a good decision. Suddenly, my vision starts to turn black, from edges to...
~~
Bright lights from above make me blink for I cannot count how many times. I look down and see myself lying in a clinic bed. Shoot, this is not the exam day I've been looking forward to. I gather my energy to get up when an arm from a man who looks too young to be a doctor stops me.
"You're probably thinking about going back to your room to continue your test. Well, sorry to burst your bubble, but that isn't going to happen. It's past 7 o'clock, and finishing it won't lower the chance of you failing it," he remarks.
Aside from the disbelief that it is already evening, the last words from his mouth make my face change from shock to one with a raised brow.
"Excuse me, mister. But who are you to assume how my test results are going to be?"
He just shrugs my question off, which forces me to release my scoffs.
"Your blood pressure is too low; cortisol levels are elevated. Stress combined with sleep deprivation can lead to difficulties in concentration. Hence, you have a high probability of failing your test earlier," he comments, as if he is trying to defend his rude assumption.
I keep my mouth shut. What can I do? He is not wrong after all. But still, that was one hell of an important test.
He clears his throat, shoving my thoughts aside as if he can read them.
"Don't worry. Your test paper will not be checked just yet; they have put it on hold; meaning, you can still continue where you left off. Just talk to your professor about it."
Who is this guy? Usually, people working in this clinic won't care less about those things; they will just do their medical job. I secretly tilt my head to look at him. He seems to be in his mid- to late-twenties. Brown eyes, a sharp jawline, and a pointed nose—not to mention his strikingly deep voice that you wouldn't dare to ignore.
He clears his throat once more, giving me the hint that I have been staring a bit longer than I intend to.
"I need to go now," I say, trying to break the awkward silence.
I have never been comfortable in these kinds of situations. Most people would describe me as an expressionless, cold introvert. Well, I cannot deny that. I despise the feeling of being looked at or the feeling of being in the company of others. The former makes me really self-conscious, while the latter drains my energy.
However, this guy with broad shoulders and toned biceps is just casually scrolling through his phone with no sign of awkwardness or discomfort at all.
"Nope. You have to stay overnight. The additional lab tests' results have not been released yet, so we cannot entirely be sure what caused you to collapse," he explains.
"I can't stay the night here. I need to go home," I repeat.
"Speaking of which, I cannot access your phone without your consent, so I could not call anyone to inform them of what happened to you. Give your parents a ring, and I will explain to them why you must stay the night here."
"I don't have parents anymore," I plainly said.
"Guardian?"
"No one; I live alone. You don't have to inform anyone. I now agree to just stay here until morning," I answer, and I just go back to lying down and cover my head with the thin blanket they have provided.
This is already a very common situation for me. All my life, I have been asked millions of times about where my parents are, or any guardian for that matter. It is not like I still get affected by that. I must say that it is even the exact reason why I am as strong as a rock.
He seems to notice that I suddenly become quiet, so he asks,
"What do you want for dinner? I'll order in."
His voice is really something. It is like the sound of music that you will not stop yourself from listening to.
"I'll have whatever you will have," I answer. I cannot demand what I am really craving since I don't like anyone paying for my meal. However, since I am stuck here in this small clinic filled with nothing but white walls and blinding lights, I can't go to the bar I usually go to to perform and enjoy a free dinner afterwards. Speaking of the bar...
"Oh my god!" I exclaim.
He is taken aback as I express my disappointment to myself, raising his brow as if he is asking what the problem is.
How can I forget that I have a gig every Friday? I haven't been able to attend it for two weeks since I was studying for my test and promised my boss that I would be back this time since the test is over, but...
My hand instantly searches the bag to find my phone and sends my boss a message. Upon turning it on, multiple messages welcomed me.
"Are you okay now? Just talk to Mr. Lim on Monday about the test. Tell me when you get home. xoxo"
"Where are you now? You're supposed to be checking the song list."
"I will wait for you for 15 more minutes."
"I have given you too much time, Maddie. You don't have to come back next week. I have hired the singer who took your place two weeks ago."
"Fuck."
"Here?" this guy in a white gown suddenly remarks.
My disgusted face shows, and I suddenly realize that I said that out loud.
"Kidding. What's the matter?"
"Nothing. I've just been fired from work."
"You're working?"
"Part-time."
"Why?"
"Why did I get fired, or why am I working?"
"Both," he casually says.
"I need money."
"And?"
"I need money. That's my answer to both of your questions."
"Why did you get fired for needing money?" he curiously asks again.
I take a deep sigh. I am so frustrated that a guy with a stable job asks too many questions he can never relate to, so I have to explain it to him all at once so he will shut up.
"I have to get a good score, so I studied really hard for that test. If I don't, I will lose my scholarship, which means I will have to find ways to earn money again just to graduate, but because I freaking lost consciousness while I was just about to get myself some water, then woke up an hour later than the time I was supposed to be there—"
"Then marry me."
My eyes widen more than they ever have in my whole lifetime.
"Wha-- What did you just say?"