Axel silently cursed as noise continued to spill from Kyle's mouth. He had been spewing nonsense since they set out in search of Ido, clearly trying to start conversation, but it had long since devolved into a long-winded monologue. Axel found himself instinctively tuning Kyle out, letting the storm of words surround him and gently wash past without leaving any lasting impression.
"Ido's a cool dude, though," Kyle chattered. "A little cold, but he's great. Very dignified. Kind of like a fantasy novel noble, except not the arrogant, annoying kind."
Axel quietly walked besides Kyle as they continued southeast, moving through the forest to where Kyle said Ido's castle was.
"He especially hates arrogant people, though. That's probably why he's not arrogant despite being so strong," Kyle continued, disregarding the fact that Axel was ignoring him.
Axel's eyes scanned the dark, mist-covered trees around them as they walked, their path illuminated only by the blinding white flame that Axel held in his hand.
"But let me let you in on a little secret," Kyle said, lowering his voice. "He's actually pretty soft, unlike his looks."
Axel's stomach growled. They would need to get food sooner or later. He was getting hungry. Axel's eyes began to scan the forest for any signs of life, but unfortunately, his sight couldn't pierce the fog.
"I knew it the moment he noticed that my memories were being suppressed by some sort of magic," Kyle said.
Axel suddenly snapped to attention, rapidly scraping up the willpower to listen to Kyle's ramblings and turning to look at Kyle.
Kyle, walking ahead of Axel without a care in the world, didn't notice any of this and continued speaking. "He used his magic and got me my memories back. And boy, were they shocking."
Kyle turned to look at Axel, seemingly unsurprised to find Axel listening with both ears open, and smiled slightly.
"But that's besides the point."
Axel sighed and shook his head.
"The one time I actually pay attention to you-" he muttered.
"Wait, what?" Kyle asked, snapping around to scrutinize Axel's expressionless face.
"Nothing," Axel said.
"Doesn't sound like nothing."
"Whatever," Axel muttered.
"Hey, you can tell me. I can keep a secret," Kyle said with a mischievous grin.
"Enough of that," Axel said.
"Boy, you sure developed a temper," Kyle chuckled.
"And whose fault is that?" Axel asked, shooting Kyle a glare. Kyle backed up a few steps and held his hands up in surrender.
"Alright, alright, I get it," he said. "I'm sorry, okay?"
"Sorry doesn't cut it," Axel muttered.
Kyle clicked his tongue in annoyance. "Well, it's not like I can do anything else."
Axel sighed and continued walking. Kyle fell silent and followed at his side. As they walked, Axel began to replay Kyle's words in his head. Most of what he said had gone in one ear and out the other, but a few things stuck with him.
Well, one thing, actually.
Axel's mind was calm and rational most of the time, but when he tried to think back to the past, it became a jagged, broken mess. Snippets of memory - words he didn't know, faces he couldn't see, events he didn't remember - cropped up every now and then. They would pop up and rear their head the moment something related to them would happen, faster and easier than Axel could count to 10, but when Axel tried to dig up those memories on his own, they would remain stubbornly hidden, burying themselves in a sea of blank nothingness that made Axel wonder if those memories even existed in the first place.
Axel glanced at Kyle out of the corner of his eye.
Was it the same for him? He said he has his memories back now.
"Kyle," Axel said, his voice cutting through the silence.
"Yes?" Kyle turned to Axel.
"Your memories… Ido helped you unlock them, right?"
"Yep," Kyle said. "I can ask him to do the same for you if you want."
Axel shook his head. "That's not what I'm asking."
"Then what is it?"
"What was it like, getting your memories back?"
Kyle fell silent, walking with a conflicted look on his face.
"Well," he finally said. "It was a big shock."
"How so?" Axel asked.
Kyle sighed, his voice dropping into a low whisper. "Those lost memories… it was about our old home."
Axel stopped walking. Kyle glanced back at him.
"It had our families, our school, our future, our friends…" he said, looking at Axel with a sad look in his eyes. "…well, my friends, at least. You didn't have any."
A part of Axel couldn't look away from Kyle's eyes. Contrary to Kyle's joking tone, a forlorn look covered his eyes. A deep sadness lingered behind the cheerful, joking mask that he normally wore. A lightless nostalgia that yearned endlessly for a world from which he had long since departed, and could not return to.
Something clicked in Axel's mind. A burning question that he had asked in the back of his mind, but never received a proper answer to.
Axel opened his mouth to speak, but the words refused to leave his tongue.
Is this why you betrayed everyone? Axel wanted to ask.
Axel took a deep breath and tried to ask again, but a different question came out.
"The time you got your memories back from Ido," Axel said quietly, the words flowing with the breeze in a soft murmur, "when was that?"
Kyle looked up. His eyes were clearly ready to move on, but he seemed to understand the meaning behind Axel's question.
"Shortly before… the incident," Kyle said quietly.
Axel's body froze. His heart and mind were silenced like the flip of a switch at Kyle's words.
"Maybe that's why I snapped like that," Kyle said, his voice shaking slightly. He turned away from Axel. "Maybe that's why I killed all those people."
Kyle looked down at his hands, now weathered and scarred from years of fighting. His voice came out a wretched mess, quivering with regret and longing.
"I just… didn't feel like this place was my home. I got tired of everything." Kyle looked slowly up to meet Axel's eyes. His face had drooped into a desperate gaze that was on the verge of giving up. His voice came out in a broken, raspy tone that blended into the cold wind that gently blew through the fog.
"So I guess I'm a murderer now. I'm not expecting to be forgiven," he said, gazing into Axel's eyes, eyes hooded in the weariness of a warrior who had fought a thousand battles and now just wanted to rest. His last words came out in a choked sob. "I just want to go home."
Axel's heart, which had been cold and still throughout Kyle's entire speech, holding him and freezing him in place, forcing him to listen to every word Kyle said without a single response, expression, or movement, finally beat. A strong beat, powerful, filling Axel's body with heat and making him quiver slightly. Deep emotions that had buried themselves within Axel's mind, hidden underneath the layers of buried memories, slipped through, a single drop out of an ocean, but was enough to spark Axel's frozen mind into action.
It's lonely here, Axel's mind said. Axel twitched slightly. His mind flickered backwards. Every memory he had dredged up, every experience he had gone through with the Gem Keepers, it was all laid bare before him.
Axel looked at himself, combing through all his thoughts and memories.
As he stood there in silence, lost in his mind, a single question arose in his mind.
Why do I feel so… detached?
It was as if he didn't care what happened to the those around him.
He didn't care when Cyil assigned him to cooking.
He didn't offer much insight, even when he heard that he was the gem keepers' last hope to getting to the Beyond.
He didn't particularly want to reunite with them, even though they were relying on his memory for their goal.
He simply stood apart from them, lost in his own little world, following their lead as he wished, breaking off and walking away whenever he pleased.
He hadn't even wondered what happened to the other gem keepers since arriving on Argean.
The only thing he was particularly concerned about was walking through the past.
It was as if none of it mattered.
This was not his world.
These were not his friends.
These problems were not his to solve.
These enemies were not his to fight.
This world was not his to save.
This war was not his to intervene in.
He was just a guest, playing around with his little sword and small flame as everything died around him, caring nothing for those who fell and continuing to walk forwards, emptily, fruitlessly, unable to see the end of his path.
He would do anything to escape this prison and run into the Beyond, hoping to find something of meaning there.
"It's… so empty," Axel said quietly.
Kyle nodded his agreement and dipped his head. When he looked back up, his eyes were burning bright with determination.
"I don't care what you say. I'm getting you your memories back." Kyle stepped closer to Axel and locked Axel in his determined gaze. "We're going home. One way or another."
Axel looked into Kyle's eyes for a moment, surprised to see his friend's eyes light up with such blazing passion for once.
Wait, friend?
Yes, Axel nodded to himself. Friend. Kyle's my friend.
Axel took a deep breath, looked Kyle in the eye, and nodded.
A smile spread across Kyle's face. Not a jesting smirk or joking grin like he normally had, but a thankful, relieved smile.
"Alright. Let's get going, then," Kyle said, putting his hand on Axel's shoulder
"Yes," Axel said quietly, smiling slightly back at him. The two's determined gazes fixated on each other for a moment, fiery passion meeting curiosity and determination.
Axel's stomach growled suddenly, breaking the atmosphere.
Kyle glanced back at Axel. The two looked at each other in silence.
The corners of Kyle's mouth tugged up irresistibly.
"Looks like someone's hungry," Kyle smirked, his voice shaking slightly with barely suppressed laughter.
Kyle's stomach growled as well.
Axel's face broke out into a grin.
"Speak for yourself," Axel snickered, going a far worse job at hiding his amusement. "You sound like you have a bear stuck in there."
The two couldn't take it and broke out into uproarious laughs, resonating through the mist-covered forest as the morning breeze blew, heralding the coming of dawn over the fog-shrouded land as a pair of humans, visitors from another world, laughed uncontrollably, staggering off into the brightening forest in search of something to eat.