"Life sucks…" muttered a man under the relentless downpour, clutching a bottle of alcohol. However, weirdly enough, he was smiling. His name was insignificant now, as nobody cared to remember it anymore.
In his youth, he had been subjected to relentless bullying. Despite his attempts to stand up, each effort was met with indifference from his teachers. "What do you want me to do?" was something he heard too often. It was not that he did not try, but every resistance attempt would lead to an even more violent beating.
He considered ending his tormentors' lives or ... his misery. But his cowardice prevented him from taking either route. Instead, he persevered, clinging to the notion that these were mere phases in life.
Had he known his parents? That was a distant fantasy. Found in a trash bin, accompanied by vermin and mold, he was discarded, unwanted. The orphanage became his home, where funds were scarce, and the staff's corruption left children malnourished. A death due to neglect was swept under the rug, a stain hidden by corruption's cloak.
After finally finishing school, he got a job in a management company and was thrilled about it. After a few years of hard work, he thought he was finally happy. He found a lovely wife called Chloe with a sweet personality and even found a pretty nice wooden house with two floors on loan. The house, albeit in a very isolated forest, had its charm.
Initially appearing to be an understanding person, his boss quickly revealed a different side once they started working together. The boss tended to exploit employees, pushing them to their limits and occasionally withholding pay, often citing reasons such as, "We'll compensate you when the company improves, so put in more effort."
But despite some financial struggles, he was happy. He even discovered his wife was pregnant! It was a beacon of hope in his world!
"Honey, how should we name the children?" Chloe's question unveiled dreams of a brighter future. Chloe was a woman with a bit of character. She had long, beautiful blonde hair, a round face, and a pretty curved figure.
"Um, I'm terrible with names, but how about "Tinkerbell," Frederick confessed with a warm smile.
With a chuckle, Chloe just laughed along before stopping suddenly. "Wait... you were serious? Do you want to name our child with the name of a dog?" she asked, surprised, before bursting into laughter.
He thought that the dark chapter of his life was finally over, and that was his reward for not giving up, for not having any … but life seems to say otherwise.
As the days advanced, his dream crumbled suddenly one morning. Frederick was about to hop off to work using his newly brought car when he heard his phone ring. After checking who was calling him, he saw it was his boss. With a disgusted face, he picked up his phone and faked a joyous tone.
"Hello, boss! Don't worry, I finished the work you sent me yesterday-" However before he could even finish talking, his boss, who had a pretty deep voice, said suddenly
"You're fired." Before hanging up brutally, leaving Frederick frozen for a good minute.
Starting to panic, Frederick tried to call his boss again, only to be rejected every single time.
This simple sentence is the start of his downfall toward madness.
With a rushed movement, Frederick dashed outside and went to his company in a hurry to ask his boss what was going on. After reaching his workplace, exhausted, he saw that all his stuff was in a box on the floor in front of the building where he works.
Dejected and shocked, he went to his boss, who was busy flirting with his secretary.
"Boss! What did I do wrong?! Please tell me! You … You can't just fire me like that, please! Give me another chance to repair for whatever I did wrong!". His overweighted boss glared at him.
With a bit of disdain on his face, he said, "Well, you're simply unlucky that I found out that you tried to report me for not paying for all hours. I treated you all like my children, and you dare to accuse me falsely?! Now get out of here with your stuff before I call the cops!"
Distraught at what the heck had just happened, and before being able to say that it was not him, the security violently kicked Frederick out of his workplace.
After gazing into space, thinking why such a thing happened, he decided to go home with a heavy expression. However, after arriving near his house, which looked terrible due to lack of maintenance, he suddenly stopped.
He could not bring himself to enter. He was too ashamed to tell his wife, who works at home, that he got fired. It was his fault alone, so nothing else matters anymore anyway. And besides, if she knew how horrible things became inside her husband's head right now ...
Instead, he decided to go to a grocery store and planned to buy alcohol to escape his miseries by getting drunk before going home. As he was loading his basket of random alcohol, his phone rang. It was his best friend and also a coworker… ex-coworker. He took the call and said in a sad tone, "Hey Jacob…".
On the other side of the phone, Jacob said in a sad voice, "Hey Frederick, I heard what happened today… I'm sorry to hear that. Are you at home? Want to talk about it?".
Frederick said in an even more depressing tone. "I went to buy some… stuff. I'll probably go home only tonight as I … I can't face my wife about it yet …Also, aren't you supposed to be at work?" Frederick asked.
"Well, I'm indeed supposed to, but the pig let us a day off because he fears more people reporting him … Talking about that, was it true that you reported him?"
Frederick said angrily and almost yelled in the store, "No! It wasn't me, but this son of a bitch still framed me for doing it!"
Jacob then asked in a surprised tone, "What? You didn't do it? Then who did?"
Frederick couldn't guess who could have done this as he was pretty invisible and did not have any enemies. Moreover, there were over 200 persons in the company, and it was pretty much impossible to find the responsible. So after a long moment of silence, he just answered a simple"I don't know."
Jacob just sighed and said, "Okay, man, just call me when you are almost at home. I'll bring some beer, and we could talk about it after your… discussion with Chloe. Also, don't worry about it, man; it's only a job. You can get another one, don't worry about it. Also, if you need financial support, I can always help, y'know ?"
"Thank you, man, you always have the words to cheer me up," said Frederick, feeling a little better before hanging up. Talking to his best friend, indeed, cheered him up a bit. After a moment of watching the basket with all the alcohol he took, he surprisingly put them all back on the shelves and said with determination in his head.
'No. I can't escape reality forever. I should go back and try to fix everything. I can still get another job. It is still much better than when I was a kid… I still have Chloe and Jacob and my soon-born child.'
With newfound resolve, he left the store empty-handed. He took his new car and went back home, deciding to find a way to fix the issue instead of running away from it. After arriving in front of his home, it surprised Frederick to see that there was a car.
Double-checking the plate, Frederick, it was his best friend's car with a delusional thought. Frederick thought perhaps he forgot and called Jacob to come beforehand … Or maybe he just went into his house and made a surprise party to help him in this dark moment of his life…
Taking a deep breath, he entered the house cautiously, moving slowly to determine their location. After a thorough check, he confirmed no one was on the ground floor.
'Perhaps they are upstairs?'
While ascending the staircase, he surprisingly overheard his wife engaged in conversation with Jacob.
"You did what?! He's your best friend. How could you ?!" Yelled Chloe in a furious tone
"Listen, I'm sorry I… I panicked when the boss heard me talking about knowing who reported him… and I… I said in panic that it was Frederick..." answered Jacob with a slightly ugly face and a bit of regret.
"But you were the one who did it! Why didn't you denounce yourself afterward?!" yelled Chloe again in an even more furious voice.
"I … can't." After a long moment of silence, Jacob finally said, "Does he know that you're pregnant with my kid?"
"I didn't tell him yet… I tried multiple times, but I couldn't resolve myself to do it…" said Chloe with a bit of resilience
"Don't worry, I'll take care of our children if needed. Just don't tell him about us."
"But …"
"Everything will be fine. I called him earlier, and he'll only get home tonight."
After a few minutes, soft moans could be heard in the entire house. But Frederick's mind was blank. There was nothing inside his head. A few minutes after hearing the conversation, he felt something shattering inside him. He tried again and again in his life, and finally, he was tired of trying, and his already unstable mind shattered.
He felt pain. Very painful… The worst is that he knows that no one will care about it. He knows that. He knows he is back to zero again, back to where he had no job. No friends. And none to care about him. He was exhausted and all alone again.
'I hate it. I hate it all. Why can't I be happy? Why am I not allowed to be free from pain? … I don't understand what I did to deserve this! I tried my best! But it isn't enough … It is never enough!'
It is only at this moment that he finally understands he can only count on himself. Under the moans, Frederick's green eyes slowly lost their brightness and finally turned colder than ice.
He took a deep breath, and with a deadpan look in his eyes, he silently locked the bedroom door, leaving the key inside the lock with a bright smile but still with an icy look. If someone saw him at this moment, it would creep them out.
He then went downstairs as silently as possible and opened an old chest that he got from cheap before taking out a few jerricans that he got for his chainsaw since he couldn't afford gas in winter.
He then emptied all the jerrycans all over the floor around the house. After emptying every bit of the precious oil, he just dropped the jerry cans.
"Did you hear anything ?" asked Chloe in a panicked voice.
"It's probably just something that fell over, don't worry," re-comforted Jacob. After a few instant, the moaning reappeared.
With the same smile, he went into the living room, unlocked a little cupboard with a key that was hidden under the carpet, and took out a precious bottle. This was specially saved for a long time as it was supposed to be for the birth of his child.
With no hesitation, Frederick opened the bottle before drinking a good amount of it and then put it on a table near the TV.
He then went inside the kitchen, had some dirty plates, and took out a knife that he newly bought and some matches.
Frederick went back to the living room and, with strength, directly cut a piece of the curtains before putting the torn piece of fabric directly into the bottle of the precious alcohol.
He left the knife on the sofa before going outside, accompanied by his homemade Molotov cocktail.
With another big breath, He watched his house one last time as he used a match on the piece of fabric that started burning. With a last look, he threw the homemade Molotov inside his house. The fire was burning rapidly through the wooden house, and a thick black smoke invaded the house rather quickly.
Jacob and Chloe quickly noticed that something was wrong after smelling something burning and promptly tried to open the door but found out, to their horror, that the door was locked. While Jacob was coughing, he attempted to pass through the windows but found, once again, to his horror, that he couldn't! The bedroom had multiple windows, but all of them were not big enough for anyone to pass! While trying to escape, both of them noticed Frederick looking at them with deadpan eyes.
Seeing their attempt to go through the windows, Frederick said in a soft voice. "Honey, I told you we should've renovated the house and made the windows a bit bigger… Well, I will not complain." As he was watching the house that he loved so much burn, he felt somehow good… If he can't be happy, none should be allowed to. Isn't that the infamous equality that everyone craves so much?
Frederick then walked away with his chainsaw …and under some pleas for help from inside as the smoke was getting thicker by the second.
After a good 5 minutes of walking and checking. Frederick found the perfect tree and quickly started to "work on it."
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In another part of the town, a burly man with a thick mustache was peacefully savoring his coffee when an alarm interrupted him brutally.
Hearing a familiar alarm, the burly man stopped sipping his coffee. He rushed at his firefighter uniform before putting it on as quickly as possible and rushed to one of the three trucks that were mobilized before departing as he was the last one to arrive.
"Chief, someone reported smoke in a nearby forest. It seems that a house caught in fire suddenly," said another man with a scar on his big nose.
"How much time until we arrive?" asked the burly man
"Over 11 minutes, as it is pretty far, and the helicopter will arrive in about 20 minutes to ensure that the fire doesn't spread to the nearby forest," responded his colleague.
The chief nodded and started preparing his mind for the fire, albeit it was pretty small, and only a single house was on fire. It will cause severe damage if the fire spreads.
However, suddenly, the truck in front of them stopped, and the burly chief could see the thick black smoke, but … He was still quite far from it. He yelled at the truck in front of him, "Why did you guys stop!? The smoke is still far! This road isn't wide enough for us to pass if you block the road, so move your ass!"
Nonetheless, as he was about to yell yet again, he noticed that… a tree with a chainsaw stuck on it was blocking their way! It was indeed Frederick's little "gift."
It was to ensure that Chloe and Jacob didn't survive … Even though they were probably pretty much cooked by the smoke at this point. But he didn't want any unexpected survival, so he took no risk and used his chainsaw to cut a nearby dead tree to block the only road to his house … making rescue late.
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After running away from his house, he went back to the store to buy alcohol. There were many people inside, but a group of people caught the eye of Frederick. It was a seemingly family composed of a handsome father, a beautiful mother, and two adorable children.
They were all wearing clothes that seemed very expensive and of good quality. Many people were staring at the family, too. Frederick could even hear some girls gossiping about them and how "cute they look together." But in the eyes of Frederick, it was almost like a direct provocation of the world to him. Frederick could practically see the world itself nagging at him and nagging at what he didn't have.
However, he didn't feel jealous at all. It even surprised him a bit. He didn't seem to feel anything...everything felt bleak.
And then he thought of the burning house, and without even knowing it, he was almost about to laugh out loud. The feeling of burning people to death somehow made him joyous, very joyous.
Frederick tried to stop himself, saying that it was disgusting to laugh at the death of people, but a famous sentence suddenly popped into his mind.
"Each one must invent their path." (Jean-Paul Sartre)
This sentence looks simple at first sight, but if you think seriously about it.
It has multiple meanings. But what Frederick mainly remembers is that he doesn't have to fit in any societal norm as you don't live for anyone except yourself.
He then calmed himself and quickly adopted this point of view.
'I only live for myself. I only live for myself." Repeated Frederick in his mind.
Slowly but surely, as he repeated this sentence, it was as if he was finally freed from an invisible heavy burden; he eventually started to laugh.
He was laughing so hard that people started to glare at him, but he didn't care. Not anymore.
Only after a good five minutes he finally stopped. And then, with a joyous tone, he exited the store with a bottle in his hand.
Returning to the present, Frederick is at the top of a building under heavy rain at night. He was thinking about ending his life by simply jumping, but … he didn't.
"Life sucks"
He just stood there. Watching the city, lively as ever. He was thinking of how one would care if he died now. Perhaps someone will even be glad that a murderer who burned to death his best friend and wife killed himself.
But at this thought, he suddenly took a step back and laughed.
"…It is indeed a beautiful night to burn in hell, but not yet. I will live on. I will succeed in whatever I do. I will live on, and I'll rebuild everything from scratch again and again if I have to...Then I will be happy!"
The echoes of his voice resonated through the night air. With each raindrop that struck him, he felt a renewal of purpose, a fire born from the ashes of his past, propelling him forward to the future.
Walking the streets, he calculated his next move. Perhaps Entrepreneurship? Illicit dealings and anything to rebuild his life. He cast aside remorse as it was now pointless. Frederick lost all his humanity and wouldn't hesitate to do anything necessary to accomplish his goal.
However, as he was thinking about his future, suddenly everything went black.