"Glad I'm out of the business," you chuckle. "I don't miss the headache of dealing with things like this."
"I know what you mean." Chen's sigh is heartfelt.
For a moment or two, there is silence between you. Not a comfortable silence by any means, but a neutral one. No aggression, at least none aimed at you.
An opportunity?
"Listen…" You hesitate briefly, for show more than anything. If you're going to have any hope of him lowering his guard, you have to play this right. "What is it really that bothers you so much about me?"
"Do you want a list or something?"
"That would be nice; why not start from the top?" you suggest, amicably.
"You're a telepath." Steel doesn't even have to think before answering, and it's not like you didn't suspect that had something to do with it.
"I was." You look straight into his eyes and will him to believe you. "That's not the case anymore."
"I know you told us that." He doesn't quite accuse you of lying, but it's close.
"Chen…" You press your fingers to the bridge of your nose as if to ward off a headache. "I don't know how to better explain this. Heartbreak messed me up. I can't read your mind anymore." The headache doesn't disappear; he is still there when you open your eyes.
"So you say." He has crossed his arms, and from the look on his face, you imagine he's probably thinking really hard about something he wants you to pick up. Just to prove a point.
"Nothing I say is going to change your mind, is it?" You brush the gentlest mental fingers over the surroundings, trying to feel if there's something here, if it's a trap.
"Doubtful," Steel replies, and you can feel his resentment.
"I don't need you to trust me." You get up to make yourself another cup, but in reality, you just need to move. Need to turn your back to him, avoid his gaze. You don't need him to trust you, but you need to know what's going on. Need. So much of your life has always been focused on that word, not enough on what you want. That's never really been an option until now. As you wait for the machine to churn out another cup, you focus on the angry thoughts of Steel behind you, finding…
Huh. Not anger. You stare at the slowly filling cup, leaning into Steel's mind behind you, finding suspicion, yes, but also regret. Mostly regret.
"I don't distrust you," he admits since you've gone silent. "You're allowed to be here." He feels guilty. Guilty over how he's been treating you, but also over how things turned out.
"I'm glad I'm not seen as a danger to the team." You're not quite sure how to deal with this information, so you grab your cup and turn around with a neutral smile. "Though maybe not everyone agrees with you." You rub your sore throat. "Lady Argent nearly strangled me earlier. She's dangerous."
"Stop." Steel holds up a hand, giving you a stern look. Did you go too far? Attacking people in the team is always a big no-no, but surely he knows she's a loose cannon? Pushing his buttons might reveal something, or it might blow up in your face.
"You know I'm right," you say with a shrug. You can't win with Steel, but maybe you can drive a wedge into the team. "She's a wild card."
"Unlike you?" He looks almost amused at the concern.
"I never joined the Rangers," you say with a theatrical shrug. "But that doesn't mean I want you to fall apart as a team."
"I know," he admits, with an honesty that surprises you. "I wish you would have."
"What? Joined?" Did you misunderstand him?
"Yes."
"I wouldn't submit myself to the background checks. You know that."
"Reason two on my list," Steel says in an even tone. You wonder how long the list is.
"Not everyone is in good standing with the US government," you say, somehow managing to keep a straight face. It's getting harder and harder. "That doesn't mean that they're bad guys."
"But it does mean that they are untrustworthy."
"They might have enemies." That slips out before you can stop it, the bitterness too much for you to choke it back. Enemies. That's one way of putting it. But, strangely enough, Steel doesn't reply right away. Instead, an uneasy silence descends between you.
You can see that he's on the verge of asking more. There's a softness to his thoughts that you've rarely felt. It's as if he's actually listening to what you are saying without preconceptions.