February 2013
It was a bright and beautiful morning. Gina was sitting in the driver's seat to my right, going at 60 kilometres per hour. Our destination was Dr. Love Café located in Petaling Jaya.
I slowly flipped through the red journal I was holding in my hands while I was talking to Gina. I had spent the whole night writing in that journal. It contained everything that I had been through in the past five years. I wrote all of my sweet, painful, regrettable, and even tragic moments in that journal.
Going through the pages helped me escape the confusion of the present reality and took me back to the past. I was in a dilemma, and I needed to make a decision. A strand of thought kept going through my mind that day. 'Anything that happens in the future comes from what I decide today'. Someone once told me that life is the greatest teacher for everyone. Armed with a journal that was full of memories, I had to look into the past to find my answer. I had to find guidance from the teacher that had faithfully stood by me all these years.
My watch indicated that it was already five minutes past nine o'clock. Dr Love Cafe typically opened at nine-thirty in the morning, and Ally, the owner, would arrive an hour early to clean up and prepare for the café's opening.
During my leisure time, I would frequently visit Dr. Love's café. Coincidentally, I had developed a close acquaintance with Ally, the café owner. He warmly welcomed both my friends and me whenever we dropped by. Besides our desire to support his charming establishment, we were drawn to the captivating atmosphere he had meticulously crafted. The interior design was truly enchanting, and, above all, the daily menu perfectly catered to our palates. Moreover, the prices were quite reasonable, making it an even more appealing choice.
Gina and I had made plans to indulge in a peaceful morning of tea at Dr Love. However, our intentions were abruptly interrupted when our mutual friend, Julia, arrived with distressing news.
"I'm done for, Ally! I'm done for, Gina! I'm done for, Marina!" muttered Julia as soon as she sat at our table. She looked troubled.
"Why? What's going on, Julia?" asked Ally. The three of us waited anxiously for Julia to give us her answer.
"Ally. Do you remember that time when I told you about Sam and his newly opened business?" Julia asked.
"Yes...," Ally answered with a nod. "'Why, Julia? Did something bad happen to that business?"
"All right. You see, I loaned Sam some money..."
"How much did you give him?" asked Ally.
"Not much... just a hundred thousand."
"Wow!" Gina, Ally and I looked at each other in shock.
"That's a lot of money you gave him, Julia," said Gina.
Julia was silent. She kept her head down but her face clearly showed her apprehension.
"I just wanted to help him, Gina. I believed in his ideas. I wanted to be Sam's business partner for both of our futures. That's why I was willing to give him that much."
"Did Sam personally ask you to loan him that amount?"
"No, Gina. It was actually me who proposed to become his business partner when he initially shared his business idea with me. He mentioned that if I was interested, I could contribute 20% to the capital. However, I willingly offered him that amount because I wholeheartedly believed in his idea. I was genuinely invested in witnessing the successful realisation of his vision."
As I sat there, trying to comprehend the situation, I couldn't help but wonder how Julia had become entangled in such a predicament. Knowing her well, I understood that she had acted out of trust and love for Sam. Throughout our friendship, I had observed Julia's tendency to prioritize the needs of others over her own, especially those who held a special place in her heart."
"Okay, but what happened? What has upset you so much, Julia?" I asked.
"A few days ago, approximately a month after the store's grand opening, I received word from one of his acquaintances that the local authorities are planning to take action against Sam."
"What? Why would the authorities want to take action against Sam?" I questioned, perplexed.
"Because he broke the law, but I'm not sure what and why. I have to ask him for an explanation first," Julia explained. She paused before continuing with her story. "If what I've heard was right, there is a possibility that his store will be closed, and he would be prosecuted. He might even be sued. When that happens, I'm sure that Sam won't be able to pay me back any time soon. I'm done for. I took out that money from my own business capital. I'm dead! The rest of the money would only be enough to cover my daily expenses..."
"Huh!" Ally sighed as he shook his head. He seemed unable to believe the things that he had just heard.
"Have you discussed this with Sam?" Gina asked.
"Not yet. I'm waiting for him to come and tell me this himself" said Julia.
I felt sorry for Julia. I understood her anxiety. Her presence that morning somehow made me think of my own fate.
So I picked up my journal and read the last sentences I wrote in my last entry before I made a new entry about Julia.
If I had uncertainties about the concept of fate prior to this, looking back through my journal made me realise how fate goes around in our lives. Our fates have been written, desires and expectations will be expressed, signs will be given, and actions must be taken. Fate has many facets that allow us to choose. We have always been given a choice, and every one of us is responsible for our own life in this mysterious reality that we live in.