Under the maple tree, the place of unspoken promises, there was nothing but an empty tin can.
Odette hurried over to it. She looked all around, but the stray dogs were nowhere to be seen. It was expected but she was a little upset.
If it wasn't for that man.
Even though she knew that her resentment was in the wrong direction, she still hated Bastian.
If he had come home after Count Xanders had gone, they wouldn't have met.
Even though she hated lame self-justification, her mind wouldn't stop.
"Bad man."
The words she uttered, as if to vent her anger, were scattered in the chilling wind that shook the night forest.
I will never cry over this marriage.
Fortunately, the self reminder worked well this time as well.
As the blurry landscape became clear again, Odette approached the maple tree at the entrance of the path. She cleared the dry leaves and acorn shells that were lying around in the tin can and put the food she had brought in.
"Puppy."
Standing up and brushing off the dust from her hands, Odette shouted toward the path immersed in deep darkness. As soon as the sound of birds flapping stopped, the forest quieted again.
After calling for the dogs a few more times, Odette leaned against the trunk of a beautiful tree. She had to go back quickly because she made the excuse to walk around the garden for a while, but she decided to wait a little longer.
If she left it like this, other animals might steal the food.
From somewhere came the sound of a nightingale singing. Odette quietly closed her eyes and listened to the song.
Hui-hwi-, the clear melody that began like a whistling sound, was transformed with a variety of techniques.
Her mother was very fond of the nightingale.
It was only that little bird that gave her mother beautiful music, after she was no longer able to go to any theater.
The night she heard the nightingale sing for the last time, she told Odette that she wanted to be that bird when she was born again.
She just wanted to sing beautifully without any painful feelings.
"But isn't it possible to sing beautifully only when you have painful feelings? You said that music should contain your heart."
Her mother smiled helplessly at Odette's words as she closed the window.
"You always have a lot of thoughts."
Thoughts.
The mother who had habitually polished Odette murmured unfamiliar words of contrition.
"Odette. My dear daughter."
Her mother, who had been gazing at her thoughtfully for so long, raised a skinny hand and covered Odette's face.
"If the day comes when I can no longer protect you, then live as a pretty fool."
Her mother's face was wet with silent flowing tears as she made an incomprehensible request.
"I'm sorry."
As if it contained the weight of her entire life, her mother fell asleep at the end of that word she gave with a deep sigh. And the next morning, the unfortunate princess Helen's death was announced.
It was an obvious betrayal.
Odette learned everything from her mother. How to speak, how to walk, how to laugh. Even how to look, listen, and think.
After falling into a situation where she could no longer have a tutor, her mother took up teaching and taught Odette herself.
Even when her feet bled from dancing in ill-fitting shoes, even when her knuckles were swollen from pressing the piano keys when she couldn't play properly, her mother didn't take it easy on her.
She would read books borrowed from the library to keep her learning, and if she did not reach the level her mother had set for her, she would mercilessly whip her. All the while her mother hoped for the day they would return to their original noble position. For that mirage.
Odette couldn't believe that the heartless master's last will for her was to become a fool.
Odette was a daughter who had never disobeyed her mother's orders, but decided not to obey her last request.
She did not want to pursue the vain dreams that had tormented her mother all her life. She just didn't want to deny the life she had dedicated so far. After all her mother eventually gave up and left, but Odette was not her mother.
But perhaps her life was the same now that she had sold her life for money, like the man said.
Someday, I will live in my place, living my life the way I want to live.
It didn't matter where that place was. Because she never wanted anything like glory that wasn't hers from the beginning.
It would be even better if it was a place where she could erase her false identity. If this marriage was over, she would be fine if her dream would come true, Odette thought.
Amidst the incessant nightingale cries, Odette slowly opened her closed eyes.
If her mother came to visit her as a bird, she would sing wistfully about how to be the fool who left without being taught. The fleeting thought brought sweet and bitter sadness.
Checking her time, Odette corrected her posture and took a breath.
Perhaps her mother was right, but she had no regrets. She already made a different choice, so she had to make the best of it.
She would not follow the life of her mother, who became unhappy because she was buried in the irreversible past. No matter what, never.
"Puppy."
Odette called the stray dogs one last time. It was just as the resigned Odette was about to turn away that the pup appeared from among the bushes. She couldn't see the mother dog that had been following her child like a shadow.
"Why are you here alone? Where's your mother?"
As the startled Odette approached, the pup whimpered and ran into roadless forest. It didn't even look at the food.
When Odette did not move, the pup came back and barked. It was as if it was calling for Odette to follow him.
Odette looked at the dark forest with a blank gaze. The puppy started running towards it again.
***
It was nearly midnight but Odette did not return.
Bastian smoked his third cigarette and stood up from his chair.
Odette had left the mansion, saying she would take a walk in the garden for a while. There was no doubt that Lovis had seen and heard it himself.
Bastian was starting to get annoyed as Odette hadn't returned after two hours had already passed.
How could she run out of the house just because she was angry?
She was uncharacteristically reckless and irresponsible. It was all the more so in that it was a protest where she knew the terms of the contract.
Checking the time again, Bastian approached the window overlooking the garden and opened the curtains. A quiet night rain that he didn't know when it started was wet the window.
When he hurriedly went out to the balcony, a cool breeze blew with the smell of rain.
Bastian let out a sigh of resignation and hurriedly began preparing to leave.
He put a raincoat over the clothes he was wearing, that was all. There was no time to worry about more than that.
"I will prepare the servants to search together."
When he went down to the hall on the first floor, Lovis approached with a nervous look on his face.
"No. One is enough."
Bastian shook his head without a moment's thought. In order not to create unnecessary rumors, a quick and quiet solution was needed. Minor quarrels and reconciliations. So that it could be the daily life of such an ordinary couple.
"Don't worry, Lovis. I already know where Odette might be."
After appeasing the butler with a skillful lie, Bastian left the mansion without any further delay.
If Odette had stayed in the garden, he would have been noticed her long ago, so she would have hid further away. The beach he had seen through the window many times was empty, so she was most likely in the woods.
After reasoning, Bastian headed towards his destination with fast strides. The sound of footsteps, gradually accelerating, continued along the rainy forest road.
It also rained the night he wandered through the forests of Ardennes the last time. Memories of the old days he thought he had forgotten all came back to life one by one through the drizzling rain.
He surely had fallen asleep lying on the bed, but when he woke up, he was in a deep forest. He was wearing pajamas and was barefoot. When his mind, which had been vaguely unaware of what had happened, was cleared, his heart became infinitely quiet.
I sleepwalk.
In the darkness of the cold rain, Bastian accepted what he could no longer deny.
Bastian already knew that he sometimes wandered through the night like a ghost while asleep. He had been in denial and hiding it for so long, but it seemed that he had passed the limit where he couldn't do that anymore.
That was why. He started tying his wrists with a rope before going to sleep. So no one would find out. Just to wake up bound and struggling alone.
If he woke up early in the morning and hid the traces, he could hide his weakness.
Even after moving to the Illis's residence, such nights often came, but Bastian managed to hide them well.
It was one weekend morning, after about a season of living with his maternal grandfather, that he showed his vulnerability. The cause of the trouble was that he was careless and overslept.
Wondering what had never happened, his grandfather opened the locked door to check on his grandson.
And there he found his grandson lying asleep on the bedroom floor like an animal on a leash.
Bastian was awakened by the screams of his grandfather.
"Who made you like this? huh? Come on, tell me. Hurry!"
Hastily loosened the rope, his grandfather poured out questions full of anger.
"I am, sir."
Bastian gave a calm answer. Blood was dripping from the wounds caused by his struggle while being tied to his rope, but it was not a pain worth worrying about.
That morning, his grandfather cried as if the world had collapsed. And Bastian silently watched him weep. He shouldn't have slept late. With regret that he shouldn't have let it out of his mouth.
His grandfather scoured the entire empire to find the treatment on sleepwalking, and Bastian silently submited to the treatment. As time passed, the disease was eventually cured. The scars left on his wrists also faded over time.
Bastian paused at the end of the path connecting the forest and the beach. As he wiped the cold rain water off his face, the memories that had long since faded into the past disappeared.
All that remained now was Odette. The troublesome woman who couldn't be found even when he searched the trails that circled the forest.
Bastian took a heavy breath and extended his stride.
Odette was on the grounds of the mansion anyway, even if she got lost. The likelihood of a major accident was low.
Even though he knew this, Bastian had a hard time controlling his emotions. So was the unpleasant quarrel at the dinner table. Even though he knew Odette was innocence, he couldn't stop his hurting words.
The fact that this kind of turmoil was no longer unfamiliar suddenly made Bastian feel defeated. It wasn't too difficult to find the starting point.
It was an early spring evening when the energy of winter was still left. The very moment when the unfortunate woman took off her veil.
The belated regret that he should have had taken the stakes of the night that day crept into the dead darkness. Had it been, he would have passed as a one-night stand. Even if he was reunited with her as a marriage partner, it would be different than now.
No matter how important the emperor's order was, he would never again deal with the woman who sold her body in the back alley gambling house.
He dragged the woman he should have put away like that into his life. However, it was a mistake that could not be undone, and if that was the case, it should end perfectly as planned.
Bastian cut through the confusion with a clear conclusion. Like the boy from those days who tied his wrists so that the nights wouldn't ruin him. And again, he began to search the trail that was now heading deeper into the woods.
It was around the time when he realized that more searchers would be needed when he sensed the presence of people on the road leading to the cliff overlooking the sea.
Bastian slowly approached the tree in front of the cliff. He let out a deep sigh as he noticed a woman sitting under it, preoccupied with something.
"Odette."
As he called her name in a whisper, the muddy woman turned her head.
It was definitely his wife, Odette.