Despite their fall out in real life and over the phone, Lanelle still held hopes that Killian would show up at their usual hotel, in their usual room, for their usual agenda. She had come straight from work with a taxi and had on her lingerie that she knew Killian would like.
She had lost count of how many times her eyes visited the watch on her wrist. He was supposed to be there an hour ago. According to her calculations, she wasn't supposed to be alone in bed like she currently was. She now only felt one thing: anger. She felt like a fool.
"Son of a bitch!", she cussed as she grabbed her phone from the bedside table. She scrolled to Killian's number. But before her finger tapped on the dial icon, she heard the clicking of the doorknob.
Her eyes froze towards the door as she watched it open. Killian, who didn't seem in any way bothered, restless or in a hurry, walked inside and closed the door behind him. And he stood by the door, both his hands now resting inside the pockets of his jeans.
The silence in the room was loud as Lanelle glared at him from the bed.
"I'm waiting for you to say something.", she said, arms folded on her chest.
"We should stop.", Killian began, speaking as gently as he always did.
"Stop what?", she asked,
"Whatever it is we've been doing for months. I know it wasn't dating but none of us was ready to pull the plug. Let's end this.",
"Why?",
"Because it's heading towards nothing. I wanted a serious thing with you, but you only wanted to fuck. I've given you what you wanted, and now I'm done.",
Lanelle huffed, "You had time to tell me this, so why are you telling me now? Did you perhaps regain your confidence?",
"I know what you mean, and it's not that",
"Just because she changed your shirts doesn't mean she has the power to make your life better. I know you can't stop thinking about me, and it's going to take time, a long time. It's going to hurt you more than it hurt me, and finally you'll come begging for me.",
"I'm certain that it won't happen.",
"Motherfuck_", she swallowed the cuss, and sighed, "Listen to me; Eris is way out of your league. Do you think when you go tell her that you ended our fuckeries with me then she'll let you fuck her? Think again. I know girls like her, doing everything they can to gain the favor of everyone around them. They're manipulative and …",
"This has nothing to do with Eris. It's between me and you.", Killian interrupted, "You don't know Eris that well, and neither do I. But I know you, and I admit you might know more about me too. Yet, we can't move forward. That's it.",
Killian turned around and held the doorknob.
"You could've called, you know. Instead of wasting a journey", said Lanelle.
"You're right. I could've",
He opened the door and left. Lanelle stared at nothing for a while. It seemed she wasn't getting what she wanted to get that evening. She kept bottling up all her emotions so well in the past, but now it felt like the bottle was about to explode.
…
Eris inspected that slice of cake for the 90th time. It had to be perfect. Any treat accompanied with an apology had to be perfect. She had baked a delicious red velvet cake and was now standing outside Deb's door with a fat slice on a plate. Fingers crossed; she hoped Deb would like it.
Deb opened the door shortly after Eris knocked. Normally, she'd notice a person first, but that piece of cake carried the aroma of heaven.
"Is that for me?", excitedly, Deb asked.
"All yours", said Eris as she handed the plate to her, "It's a bribe", she added.
"Come in",
Eris walked in and gently closed the door. Deb was already surfing in the kitchen drawer for a fork, and found it. She took a chunk of cake and shoved it in her mouth.
"Whatever it is you want to apologize for, you're forgiven, thanks to this cake", Deb said after she gulped.
"I think it's more serious than that",
"I don't think you've done me wrong",
"I told you about Duante",
The light on Deb's face slowly faded.
"I should've known how serious it was. I'm sorry. Sometimes it's truly better to just keep my mouth shut", Eris proceeded.
"It's alright. It's my fault. I unknowingly puzzled you instead of just telling you the facts. I was supposed to tell you that Meshack and I are dating. Maybe if I did that, you wouldn't have paid heed to Duante.",
"I'm selfishly and shamefully asking you to forget what I said. I just want things to go back to the way they were before I came",
"Where's the fun in that?", Deb chuckled, "Okay, let's say I blame you for what you said. What bothers me is how blind I was all these years. How did I miss it? Duante is my day one. So how the heck did I miss it?",
"What difference would it make if you knew it from the beginning? Date him instead of Meshack?",
Deb knew the answer but was not brave enough to say it, "His feelings deserved to be acknowledged", she said.
"Then what?",
"And then he wouldn't feel like I hurt him on purpose",
"One thing I've noticed and love about you Deb is that you aint a people pleaser. Which brings me to this next question; Do you care about Duante's feelings because he's just somebody you've known for a while, or was there a spark in you and you blew it out thinking it was never going to turn into a flame?",
Deb put the cake down and leaned by the counter. Her face wore a worrisome look. Her inhales deepened, and her exhales were stressful. Eris became concerned, and the guilt in her heart was overwhelmingly heavy.
"Deb, talk to me. What's wrong?", she asked, worried.
"I thought _ I thought I blew out that spark", Deb looked at her, "But it was still hovering all these years. It found a wick, and now this flame grows wild each passing day. I'm afraid it's not going to burn me alone",
Eris took Deb's hand, "Is there anything I can do?",
"I just want to be alone with Duante, just one more time",
An ex asking you to go get your remaining stuff from his house, a lion inviting you into his den, a crocodile quizzing you to count his teeth, all had one thing in common: a trap! A very bad idea. And Eris was well aware, but she knew Deb was mentally existing away from the logic lane.
***