Chereads / The Desperate / Chapter 16 - Nature

Chapter 16 - Nature

Suddenly, Celeste decided to stop walking and just stare towards the central area, where the Queen's Palace was located. And after a few seconds of staring there, as if she were looking directly at where her mother is, she spoke:

"Everything always passes, but the way it happened was very cruel for my mother. She was much happier than she had been in her entire life. She had recovered from her depression, guilt and remorse, she began to exude confidence, pride, love and affection. But now, she's gotten even worse than before, you can tell from Snotra's reactions that she's getting worse. And from what Uncle Rafael told me, she will soon not be able to continue as Queen…"

This time she couldn't hold back her tears… But at least this time it wasn't just Emmanuel who tried to comfort her with gestures, Daehyun who had already come out of his introspection and was just listening also started to gently caress Celeste's other shoulder.

But still, that wasn't enough, the tears flowed even though Celeste was trying to control it. Meanwhile, she continued to speak:

"I didn't want it to be this way, it doesn't make sense for me to take my mother's place in such a degrading situation... She is slowly withering and Aura will soon call her and I can do absolutely nothing to stop it... Just watch and wait for the worst."

Words would hardly help at this point. Celeste also doesn't want words of cheer or encouragement, she just wants to vent and try to lighten the weight in her heart that she has been accumulating in the last few months.

Two of her companions understood this very well and said nothing. He just stayed beside her, comforting her silently but softly and gently. They just stood there waiting until her tears stopped and they could continue on their way.

What happened a few minutes later, Celeste returned to her initial posture and her expression improved a little. Now she didn't seem to be breaking down, just a little dejected.

Even so, they silently took their walk towards the next meeting point. And a few minutes of silence passed, only the small noises of the night stood out.

After what had happened for several minutes, Daehyun, who hadn't spoken for a while, decided to say a few words to Celeste:

"I always admire that about you and Annabel, the empathy I mean. You guys were always very sensitive to other people's feelings, Master always said that Annabel excelled at that even among the dark elves and that you had a natural talent for it."

They were sincere words, at the same time they seemed to be very difficult for him to say. Even Emmanuel was surprised, both by Daehyun admitting that he admired Annabel and why he was describing her.

Daehyun would hardly know what to say in these moments, but even harder would be for Daehyun to admit his lack of sensitivity to others' emotions. Or at least that's what Emmanuel thinks.

Celeste didn't expect those words from him either, she could expect it from Helena or Fianna, but never from Daehyun. But it was a welcome surprise this time. For her, anything that made her feel less helpless would be like a balm right now.

Daehyun felt the surprise of his teammates, it was a little derogatory for him, but his actions and conduct corroborated this reaction. He didn't care so much about it and preferred to stop there, but now that he started the discussion, it would be impolite to stop. Therefore, he continues to speak with sincerity but still with some difficulty:

"Out of all 6 members of our group, I'm mediocre likeable, that's for sure. Even Helena or Emmanuel who seem dense and ignorant, always manage to distinguish well the feelings and emotions of other people. But for me, the only thing I can understand is my own feelings, even after so many years living with you, I don't have the slightest idea of your personalities."

Celeste interrupted him briefly, making a comment that she found relevant:

"I agree with the part that Helena or Emmanuel are able to discern the emotions of others well, but I doubt that he takes these feelings into account when making his decisions. They just ignore the feelings of others whenever theirs are strong enough to control his decisions."

"I'm listening too, Celeste…"

Emmanuel, was kind of slightly bothered by Celeste's comment. But he answered or tried to defend himself, only gave Celeste a subtle warning of her presence.

Celeste gave a small laugh and a shake of her head. She also took the opportunity to make an excuse for him:

"hehe, I'm sorry, but you can't deny that."

Emmanuel wanted to try to defend himself, but he soon gave up. Against facts there are no arguments, and he really is impulsive and gets carried away by emotions easily. Several times he has ended up in dangerous and challenging situations because of this.

Daehyun took advantage of the fact that there was no response to Celeste's speech, and I also continue to speak:

"I believe that too, Celeste, but in the end, I stick with my problem. I don't have the slightest bit of empathy, while they do, but don't use it fully. I just don't have that ability."

… A pause was made by him, but soon he suffered to speak:

"Mestre was always a person who knew exactly what we were feeling and the right words to say. He was like you and Annabel, very empathetic, and he always taught us how to cheer and comfort us. I wish I could be like that for my future children, but I doubted that would ever happen, my nature prevents me from that. But don't stop me from being jealous."

The fact that Daehyun ignores his own and others' feelings comes from his nature. As a Garuda, this is a characteristic trait of their race, Apollo had already explained enough to all of them why this was normal and they shouldn't be bothered by it.

At the same time, he warned everyone that this shouldn't be a problem and shouldn't hinder their relationship. They should accept and not discriminate would be the first step towards a strong and healthy relationship.

But at first it wasn't easy, even though Celeste and Annabel have high empathy they always found it hard to read Daehyun's emotions. But his bright white and orange Aura showed that he had kindness mixed with a fair amount of honor in his soul.

Emmanuel and Helena's case was always the opposite, their emotions were always strong and very easy to read. But at the same time, they were strong enough that they couldn't control them. Whenever they felt angry, their reactions were explosive, and whenever they got sad they would hardly hold back the tears.

Daehyun always taught that a good warrior should ignore his emotions and not let them influence his decisions. Even Apollo had that ability, he would never move out of anger or out of joy.

But after several years of training and living with Apollo and his companions, he managed to understand that this should not be his goal. There is a big difference between controlling your emotions and being insensitive to them.

He learned that being callous and clumsy with one's own and others' emotions was the path to ruin. He should control them, but never stop feeling them, in fact, emotions should naturally guide the warrior's path towards strength.

Aura herself wanted this, she rewarded the righteous and honorable and pure in heart. She guided them through afflictions and strengthened them whenever they felt weak. But she discriminated against those who were blind to the suffering of others and only thought about power.

This is why a Garuda must undergo trial after trial against his own nature. Every decision they make throughout their lives is a battle between their nature and their emotions. Where each garuda must choose between the blind and impartial Justice of her nature or go against it and choose to follow her emotions.

Apollo, her master, showed her how to master her nature and follow her emotions. But he also taught her to follow her nature and make rational decisions. Thanks to his master, he can say that he can understand his own emotions a little.

But he is far from reaching the level of insight he needs to truly overcome his impartial and callous nature. He knows it will take a long time, and the time may not even come when he will be able to find words to comfort someone or to motivate his companions.

For now, he can only look at them and try to say words of encouragement he learned from books or from his Master, nothing more than empty words. At least he knows that his efforts are not in vain.

"Maybe that's why Master always told us to seek each other's help when he wasn't around. He didn't know what was going to happen, but he always knew that one day a crisis would befall one of us… He sure knew what to say."

Daehyun gave his last line with an ironic tone. And he was thinking about how much Apollo's words fit perfectly with the situation they are in.

But suddenly, breaking the silence of a few seconds, someone started to speak, and it wasn't a voice he knew. It was a male voice, deep and a little wistful:

"I see that his disciples have not forgotten the lessons and teachings they learned…"