The floor tiles were arranged in a pattern I couldn't quite put together but directly under my feet was a brown speckled tile, and next to it was a beige tile. That was one reason I specifically liked this hospital, I have worked at many in Las Vegas and this one has warm tones for the decor. Most of the others are on a gray color scheme, that makes me feel cold just walking in. The warmth of the tile was silently seeping courage into my feet.
How did I get here? I feel like it's a question I have asked myself too much today and doubt it will stop anytime soon. I somehow walked all the way down to the ER, found the door with 4 on it, opened the door, and before I knew it I was bowing like I never had before. Which was the truth because I actually had never bowed before. I think the tiles gave me too much courage because like a soldier getting scolded I yelled back 'I'M SORRY SIR' and then proceeded to bow multiple times for effect. My eyes finally wandered up to his face and an angelic warm smile was looking back at me.
"Thank you for coming back to me." My knees buckled then I almost doubled over from his phrasing. I quickly sat in the seat next to his hospital bed and changed the subject to save my heart.
"How are you feeling?Are you still in pain?Did they give you pain meds?"
"I think they gave me pain meds, I didn't really understand. I'm not really feeling better but I think I just need to get my mind off of it."
"Okay then, well what should we do… I know, let's play a get to know you game. We each get to ask the other person two questions but you only have to answer one, OK? I'll start! How old are you? Or How tall are you?" I smiled to reassure him.
He answered quickly, "I am 26 Korean age, so I guess 25 international age. It's my turn now right?" I nodded.
Then he lifted his arm and grabbed my hand and looked at it, then he looked up at me. His golden eyes pierced straight to my soul and said, "Can I keep holding your hand, or are you single?"
His eyes had already pierced my soul and now I am dead from his words putting a hole in my chest. My jaw dropped, I totally looked like a blushing idiot. Who raised this sly fox, and how am I the luckiest girl in the world to be with him? I doubt this is how he always is, I bet it's the drugs. Yeah it's probably the drugs. Not me. Definitely not me.
I finally get myself together and respond, "I am single, I haven't had time to be involved with anyone while putting myself through college." The warmth in my hand subsides as his hand leaves mine, "I guess I have to let go." I somehow felt bothered after that, and then I thought oh it must be the drugs. Wait, I'm not on any drugs?
"Well, it's my turn again so, who is your favorite Woo5 bandmate? Or what is your biggest life's dream?"
As the words came out my mouth like running water, I pressed my now cold palm against my lips to stop my mouth but it was too late. I tried to gauge his expression but he was facing forward and it looked stern. I immediately tried to fix my mistake, "I am so sorry, I won't tell anyone. I take my job extremely seriously. I would never do anything to jeopardize that. Please you have to believe me.I just found out I didn't look you up or seek you out at all." My ramble was about to continue when I saw the corners of his full lips turn up and he looked at me a stupid grin across his face.
"Did I scare you?" I'm quite unsure of his intentions.
"My acting classes are totally paying off, you look mortified." He grabs my chin and lifts my face up at his.
"I'm relieved, actually this is wonderful. I wanted to tell you but didn't know how without it coming across wrong." I just stared at his face, the stupid grin turned to a cheeky grin and he faced me front on, his index finger running down the side of my cheek as he pulled his fingers away. I have never felt someone stare this intently into me, I felt like I was see-through and he knew everything inside my heart. I felt like he understood it, and that he accepted it. I shook my head as the touch of his fingers disappeared hoping to clear my head of those thoughts. This must be a cultural difference to touch me so much, I'm letting it get to my head. The previous thoughts resumed.
He is a patient. New thoughts were added.
Keep your distance, and he is so dreamy.
"To answer your questions, I love Kang. Well.. about my dreams. It's difficult to explain. Let's just say that I need to be successful as an idol to be able to pursue my dream. I won't be able to face it proudly unless I cana become someone who is important. Becoming an idol was an amazing opportunity for someone like me who doesn't have much money or parental support. I will give it my all so that one day I can reach my dreams"
Someone like me. The words echoed in my head for a moment. Here I am thinking he is dreamy, and I like to watch him cry but I am now tempted to say I never want to see him cry. I want him to have everything he ever wanted.
Someone like me. The words repeated. Tears welled up into my eyes, is he someone like me?
His face starts to panic, "Ahh I'm Sorry I didn't mean to make you cry or ruin the mood at all. Umm it's your turn." I think we shared questions back and forth for an hour or two, not a single staff member came in. Worrisome, but he was in good hands, or maybe I was in good hands. All I remember as my eyes closed was him saying something about 183 cm… 6 feet. I was roused a little from my sleep with a knock on the door. It was a nurse saying Tae Woo's guardian was here, I heard footsteps and my eyes were still closed. Tae Woo was still holding my hand as I slumped over the side of his bed, my head now resting on a pillow that wasn't there before. My eyes almost flutter open but shut as fast when I hear, "Who is this?"