[Kita Shinsuke POV]: The week before Shiratorizawa's defeat "Hmm, Atsumu has been going through a bunch of moods lately. I wonder if his ok. Just this week, he was looking happier than usual, but then suddenly he was gloomy. I have got to figure out what's wrong with him. We can not be properly ready for interhigh if one of our team members is acting this way." Shinsuke monologues in his head while going to the office. Shinsuke was genuinely worried for Atsumu since the Miyagi Prefecture Spring Interhigh Qualifiers started. Shinsuke noticed how perculiar Atsumu was acting during practice and how different it was than he normally was.
When he was in practice he was acting as per usual but there was something different about him. There appears that everything he does he puts in more effort. And looking closely at Atsumu's eyes there seems to be a glimmer of happiness in there. Shinsuke had never seen Atsumu looking like that before. 'Atsumu looks so happy and it seems that he is motivated to work harder in polishing his skills.' Shinsuke thought intently while watching closely how Atsumu was behaving since it started. Shinsuke was a bit disappointed that he had noticed that Atsumu was not as happy-go-lucky as he had thought to be. Shinsuke had misjudged him based on facts people have told him. From the teachers to his teammates even his other twin. He wonders if Atsumu would ever open up to how he feels or if he did talked to someone about he feels.
At the office, Shinsuke went to go pick up the approved paperwork for the new volleyball equipment. Their coach wanted to get new ones due to how old the ones they had were not suitable for them to use at all. When storing away the equipment, they had an accident where Atsumu was bleeding from the poles they used to hold the net. Only Shinsuke and the coach remained originally talking about strategies to win the interhigh tournament. While Atsumu had to stay back to clean and store everything for being late again. Both of them heard a loud crash and looked up to see what had happened. They asked if he was okay and what happened. Atsumu confessed that he had his foot caught in a hole from the net while he was moving the pole and had tripped while cutting part of his arm on the hook of the pole. So after treating Atsumu, the coach told Shinsuke he was not allowed to play for at least one week. Thankfully, the gash was not that deep, or it could have been worse. Anyway, knowing Atsumu, the coach requested Shinsuke to make sure that Atsumu does not abrogate his injury even more by practising after being dismissed. Shinsuke agreed, but he was having trouble finding him it was like as if he was not even in school.
Once Shinsuke had collected the paperwork, he made his way out of the office. Shinsuke walked past Atsumu in the infirmary, and Shinsuke found him with more injuries. Atsumu did not seem to notice him, so he was talking to himself. "Ah, great more injuries, that means everyone will think I didn't listen to Kita-san again. Let's see what I did wrong today. Hmm... Let's see, I had gotten late again due to dropping off Hitomu at school, be compared to Osamu again, and now sitting here talking to myself because my idiot self was bitten by a fucking pet dog from Osamu's supporters. Well, what's new anyway? I know I am disappointing the team, and it is not like I wanna play volleyball anymore. I...feel like...absolute shit. Sometimes I wonder...what is my purpose of being born...when almost everyone hates me. And that makes me realise... I hate me too" Atsumu monotonous spoke out loud while muttering the last parts, degrading themself. But due to Atsumu being the only one inside the infirmary Shinsuke had heard everything. And he was watching appalled that this was how Atsumu had seen himself and even more disappointed in himself for not noticing sooner. Shinsuke did wonder who was Hitomu, and so since he can not find himself to keep quiet. He made his presence known by walking into the room. "Atsumu, why did ye never tell me ye felt this way or that yer were being bullied. Also, who is Hitomu? I didn't know ye brother if so why can't yer parents dropped him off themselves." Shinsuke asked, desperately wanting to know how he could help. "Ah...Kita-san, I thought I heard ye. Well, I didn't tell anyone because I didn't see the point. I mean, everyone thinks I was doing it for the attention but never asked why I was acting like that. Otherwise, they would have known I cut myself...Ah ye weren't meant to know that." Atsumu droned on until he accidentally revealed their secret to their captain." WHAT! Atsumu, what do ye mean I wasn't meant to know. Atsumu, I know ye might regress again, but next time, I want ye to come to me or ya parents. Please don't keep this to yer self next time, ok?" Shinsuke requested Atsumu dreading what would have happened if Atsumu had died from blood loss.
"Anyway, we will come back to that later, but why did ye never tell Osamu or anyone on the team ye were being bullied?" Shinsuke said, noting how Atsumu face had showed a grimace when Shinsuke mentioned his parents. Shinsuke will let it slide for now, but he ponders what could make Atsumu show displeasure. However, Osamu was always happy talking about their mother and stepfather. "Ha, don't get me started on Mr. Perfect compared to him, I am the twin who is childish even though I am the oldest. Well, has any of the team ever thought if I had a chance to act like a child, I think not, and they like Osamu better than me. Even Aran-kun, in his words, "Ye may be the oldest but yer the most childish. Yer shouldn't be acting like this for the attention." He assumed he knew me before even getting to know me." Atsumu spouted his words filled with resentment and betrayal that they felt. Deeply hurt that even their oldest friend thought they were acting for attention."Besides, Osamu thinks I am a no good attention seeking prat that lies so people will flock to me. Every time I try to make a friend, they always go to Osamu. I am just glad I have the "Athletic Demons." Bonus is that they at least get the chance to know me before we met in real life." Atsumu continued while mentioning their friends in doing so. A small genuine smile appeared. Shinsuke saw that and thought, "Wow, that smile is beautiful. I've never seen it before. Does that mean Atsumu fakes his smile? How has no one ever seen him faking his smile? Hmm, maybe I can get to him just to see that smile again. What am I thinking like this? Never mind, I will figure it out later right now, Atsumu is more important." Little does Shinsuke know that he was experiencing a gay panic attack. "Who are the "Athletic Demons"?" Shinsuke questioned Atsumu. "Oh, their my friends. I have met them online, and then it slowly began to turn into us seeing each other as siblings. I will tell ye all about it later, " Atsumu reassured Kita.
"Anyways, ye asked who Hitomu is, and he's my younger brother. And no, I can not tell my tell my ma and my step pa about it." Atsumu said, looking contemplative. They were thinking if they should tell Kita, but decided to tell him knowing that Kita would ask again layer."Ya see, my Ma was seeing my step Pa behind my pa's back. One day, when I was sick, my Ma came in. I thought it was to give me my medicine, but she was actually going to do the devil's tango on my bed with my step Pa. I was under the bed as I was looking for the water bottle I had dropped. For the entire time, I was covering both my ears and closing my eyes, begging for my Pa or Osamu to come back. After they were done and left the room, I vomited in the dustbin while silently crying... I knew my Ma would threaten or hit me again... if I were to tell Pa. So I searched online what they did and knew that if Ma was pregnant, it was not my Pa's but that stranger's. When Hitomu was born, my Pa knew it was not his and divorced my Ma. But when he left, I was coming back to the room after going to the toilet to control my rage, but I almost lost it. That bitch wanted to toss Hitomu into a bin to die and my step Pa agreed with her... That is why after they left I took the birth certificate and Hitomu and promised to raise him despite being eleven years old. My Ma lied to Osamu that because she lost the baby, Pa left her. Saying that, she lost another of his children and did not want to be with her... While I was watching with tears rolling down my cheeks at her lie. Therefore, I didn't see her as a mother. I saw my Ma died the moment she cheated, and with no way of coming back when she attempted to kill a baby."Atsumu spouted, and they could not stop as they were tired of bottling everything they had felt.
"So I was stuck raising a baby while still in middle school while working jobs online to support both of us. Buying baby supplies and toys including soundproofing my room so that my so called "parents" did not try to take Hitomu away from me. Since I have been raising Hitomu he saw me as a parent and a sibling. Hitomu eventually had to know about our family and I had to stay strong to no show him how affected I still was about it.
Shinsuke was flabbergasted with the information he had just heard. He could not believe that Atsumu had been holding a lot of his feelings and still could handle being bullied and degraded by everyone. "No wonder his depressed with that kind of life. I would have tried suicide."The respect Shinsuke had for Atsumu had rose the moment he had processed what Atsumu had confessed to him. "Atsumu ye so strong to have gone through that and still deal with everything everyone thought of ye. But I'm here now. I will now help ye through this ye will never go through this alone ever again." Shinsuke vowed to help Atsumu, and he would not break that promise. Atsumu eyes were watering, and in a spur of a moment, they hugged Shinsuke, the one person who now understood them. "Now I believe we should start over since based on this, none of us know ye that well." Shinsuke told him. "Very well, my name is Atsumu Miya, and my pronouns are they/them, and I'm gay..."Atsumu starts talking about themself while listening. Shinsuke thinks one last thought.
"They will get better soon, and I will help them to just so that they will never hide their real feelings again."