I'll always remember, the tender touch of hand smoothing my head when I cry. You wiped away all of the tears, put me on your lap, and said my name gently. Your voice is like an ongoing lullaby that I'll never get enough of.
"Olive, Olive, Olive... This is summertime, stop all your cry and show me your smile..."
Olive is her favorite fruit, I always spotted her eating it everywhere she wanted. She'll put it in her pocket, in her hat and sometimes she shares it with me. Ever since I was younger, she was always busy in her olive garden, but she saw me, she never fell to switch all of her attention and shower me with all the love in the world.
"Why do you name me Olive ?" I once asked her. "Dear, I have dementia and my memories are bad, but somehow I always remember my favorite fruit so if I name both of you the same I'll never forget your name"
She said in the most compassionate voice, that I forget how amusing it was, that she remembered her favorite food but not her child, but I didn't laugh, instead, I found myself wanting to protect her smile forever.
But forever never came, as soon as my graduation cap left my head so as her last breath left her body. In front of me was an old lifeless crop, losing all of its luminous light and glory, she passed on the same day I graduated middle school. My dream of seeing her wearing my cap and playing with its golden tassel has now faded to a long hallucination, I want to hear hers praise on how handsome I looked in my blue navy gown and V-neck stolen, but it now faded to a silent whisper.
A tsunami of emotion crashed all over my body and for a second I felt like I was downing. I wasn't swimming in a black sea, but my head was underwater, I felt like I was choking and gasping for air to breathe. Soon after, rage and anger consume me. I was shouting in my head.
"Hades, Pluto, Hel.! Hell, even Ryuk! who ever you are!! PLEASE GIVE ME MY GRANDMA BACK!!".
There was no answer even in my head, all I could think of is repeating the same phrase again and again
"Just give me back my grandma, Just give me back my grandma!"
No one knew what I was thinking or who I was fighting, I kept all of my emotion to myself. Inside my head, I was chasing the god of death one by one to make them release my grandma, but still, my grandma wouldn't open her stubborn eyes. My relative are by her side when she died, they prepared her crop and get ready for the funeral as fast as possible.
For the next three days the funeral was done. I remained silent, emotionless, and quiet the whole ceremony I didn't even eat or drink water, but my relatives were all busy preparing for the funeral they didn't even bother checking if I was still alive. I didn't give a speech, all I did was make myself invisible until the ceremony was done and everyone left to their residence.
In front of her grave lay the name "Julia Demopoulos a beloved wife and mother" She was buried next to "Han Jin a beloved husband and father" and next to him are "Lee Ae-Cha and Lee Joon".
The rain started to fall heavily on me, I kneed and cried like I never cried before, but the rain fell even heavier like it wanted to race me in a crying competition. In the end, even if I love her so much, I can't still win against faith or lock the siren of death in my chokehold. The raindrop beat me down, I lay face flat to the ground and let go of what I was holding.
"Goodbye to the fourth and last person who ever loved me".