"No,honey! We can't afford this.Maybe some other times,I'll try and get it for you",as the normal quote my mum would say anytime we entered a shop. I never wanted to ask anyway because I knew she would repeat her answer as if she rehearsed them purposefully for my siblings and I. But I always asked,reminding her of the hope she placed in the "Maybe some other times,I'll try and get it for you".
I'm Deborah Feldman,the elders amongst the four children of Miss Rosa.Growing up, my mother often had to say no to my requests due to financial constraints. Despite this, I always reminded her of her promise to try and get it for me in the future. My family faced many challenges due to my mother's unfortunate marriage, and we were often ostracized by society and even our own family. However, I remained hopeful and believed that God would make up for the difficulties we had faced.It was as if she had no family to run to as they all turned their back on her.A loner with big dreams and many mistakes!
I believe that even when we do everything right, life can still be difficult and people we love may turn their backs on us. However, I also believe that in our moments of weakness, God can step in and make things right.
"As for school, I encourage everyone to participate in the upcoming events as it is a great opportunity to showcase your talents,"the following Monday morning found me in Mrs.Audrey's class and I couldn't hide how uncomfortable I felt seeing her talk whilst the class was bored. A simple statement will find trouble in existing her mouth .She preferred spending an hour repeating the same sentence over and over again.
Everybody in St.Roses Senior High School knew how I was .I wouldn't say I was a nerd.Trust me,I could relate to how they felt. Even though I was considered smart, I'm also an introvert. I don't think being an introvert makes you a nerd. I loved fashion and often imagined myself wearing fancy dresses and walking down the aisle with my prince charming. However, reality can be different and sometimes harsh.It would always hit me with the lines of Cinderella living with her step mother and stepsisters.
As I walked home,I'd already made up my mind not to inform my mother about the needed requirements for the events that would be going on in my school.My ears were tired listening to disappointing statements.
In my mind and my own world,I was a princess and I needed everyone to acknowledge me on that but in reality,I was going home to perform house chores.It can be frustrating when we have to deal with responsibilities like house chores while also trying to pursue our dreams. It's important to remember that even though we may feel like princesses in our own world, we still have to face reality and take care of our responsibilities.
It wasn't that I was lazy but I wish sometimes I had an assistant,helping me do everything and just listening to my grievances.The day was ending with me spending hours in the kitchen,washing bowls repeatedly.Patience gripped my heart and silence ceased my mouth,I would have uttered everything out with tears .It seemed I was selfish and didn't want to understand this woman who was trying to give us the best in her worse.
Growing up in a broken home is a significant challenge for children as it can have a profound effect on their character, physical and mental well-being. It can lead to difficulties in trusting and associating with others..They often want to change their identities just to suit the world but deep down ,they're even broken at heart than their parents.
The days were counting themselves fast into the set day and I really and fully wasn't prepared.I saw how happily my mates were busily showing off and gossiping about how their parents are putting in much effort to make that day a memorial.My heart was flooded with pain or I should say I felt jealous at that instant .A little talk from anyone to me would have found me crying out.
Slowly,I walked down The Coast Street,with my left hand swinging my bag in an oscillatory manner and my head bent down .On a normal day,when I wasn't moody,everyone on Coast Street would countlessly hear my greetings.Unfortunately,their princess wasn't herself that day and that left the hours of me passing by quiet .
"Derby,my love!Ain't you ready for school yet.You'll be late."my mother really knew how to make my day with sweet words but on that very day,it didn't work. Her words arrow peircing my heart and annoying to me.
"I'm not feeling well. Can I please skip school today? I promise to get better before tomorrow"
"Is best you go to hospital rather than lying down here without doing anything."
"I assure you that I will get better before tomorrow. I prefer here.Is not that serious.I think I'm just stressed from working too much within this week." This statement ended the conversation.I knew it was today that my school had scheduled to give people the chance to have fun after a whole boring academic year.I didn't want to imagine the fun that they were having.It would just break me down.No one bothered to even ask me why I couldn't make it to the programme and I didn't also bother to ask how it went without me.But my ears were too inquisitive to listen.I must say I wasn't there but I felt bad missing a lot of fun since my ears cared to listen .