Chapter 191 - Soul issue (1)

"My soul... why is it fractured?!" Alex exclaimed out loud with a pale expression.

His first thought was that it was caused by the strange black heart. This cursed thing must have surely messed with him more than he thought and was the cause of his fractured soul!

This thought caused Alex to become livid, a vicious and mad expression crawling its way on his face.

The more he thought about the turn things took, the madder he got. That thing had not only invaded his body, but it had also fractured his soul. What was next? Completely destroy his soul? Absolutely not!

"I wouldn't let myself be killed just like that!" Alex uttered with a deep cold tone.

Without him consciously doing so, the smoke inside his body billowed out and quickly filled the room, its usual array of multiple colors that once made it beautiful now shimmering with an ominous light.

It was as if just by feeling the anger of its master, the smoke also became enraged and was now intent on destroying the source of its anger.

Slowly, the smoke began rotating around Alex, forming a swirling vortex around him.

Alex snapped out of his murderous thoughts when he felt that something wrong was happening.

Looking up and witnessing the forming vortex of smoke, he sighed. "Calm down," he said to himself.

Taking a deep breath, he forced his raging heart to calm down, something that had become easier after the enhancement to his mind.

'Thinking about it logically, it doesn't make sense for that thing to enhance my strength just to kill me an instant later,' Alex thought once he calmed down.

'No, in fact, there may be some sense to it. In this world, nothing comes freely. Maybe the price for the enhancement is to have my soul fractured," Alex hypothesized before shaking his head a moment later, 'there is also a problem with that train of thought.'

'Having my soul fractured should be something very painful, but I felt nothing. I even felt a comforting warmth during the enhancement, so I guess it probably wasn't the enhancement that caused such a fracture,' Alex realized.

Alex pondered on the matter for several seconds, but seeing that he couldn't come up with a good reason for there to be a fracture in his soul, Alex decided to look at his soul once again. Perhaps there was something that he missed.

Closing his eyes in silent meditation, Alex focused once more to observe his soul.

It was then that he remarked something that he didn't notice the first time, mostly due to him freaking out when he witnessed that his soul was fractured.

The thing is, his soul wasn't fractured at all!

What Alex thought was a fracture was actually the point of contact of the two parts of his soul.

Alex was about to sigh in relief that his soul wasn't fractured when he froze.

'Why does my soul have two differents parts?' he wondered, having a bad premonition.

Carefully observing his soul, Alex confirmed that his soul indeed had two parts, with one part being largely bigger than the other.

Without needing to be told, Alex understood what those two parts were: each represented the soul of one of the two persons who had fused to give birth to the current Alex.

Opening his eyes after that stunning discovery, Alex just stood there, at a loss for words and actions.

'He bigger part should be Alex's, while the smaller one is Jack's, right?' he wondered after a long time.

From what he knew and felt during his "birth," the soul of the previous Alex and Jack's had completely fused, creating a being with both of their knowledge and feelings, memories etc... So how is it possible that he is learning right now that their two souls haven't really fused?!!

Alex's head began spinning as he grappled with the truth that the foundation upon which his existence stood wasn't what he thought it to be.

[Calm down will you? Things are not as desperate as you think they are]

Hearing a voice suddenly echo in his mind, Alex stiffened for a moment before regaining a semblance of focus.

"It's the second time I'm hearing your voice in the same day. Should I be worried?" Alex spoke in a light tone, but his expression was anything but.

[Well, if the one carrying my sin is having an existential crisis, then who beside me, his goddess, could help him out?] The goddess of lust's seductive voice resounded in Alex's head.

"What did you mean by 'not as desperate as I thought'?" Alex questioned, completely ignoring her remark about her being his goddess.

[Well, contrary to what you might be thinking right now, the souls of Alex and Jack have indeed fused with one another,] the goddess of lust informed in a bored tone. [Though, I can't say for sure if it would stay like that for long. In the end, everything depends on you] she added with a slightly serious tone.

Alex felt a sudden shiver run down his back.

'Not sure if it would stay like that... Wait, how do you know about the fusion of souls?!' Alex asked with a shocked expression.

From his understanding, besides him, no one should know about what happened that day.

[Are you stupid?] questioned the goddess of lust in a genuine tone, seemingly genuinely wondering if he was an idiot.

Before Alex could retort, the goddess spoke.

[The 'previous Alex,' as you call him, had already fused with my artifact before dying and proposing the soul merge to Jack, so I had a front-row seat to watch everything happen.]

Hearing that someone else beside him knew about his most guarded secret, Alex felt...vulnerable.

The fuzziness of his mind returned once again, his eyes glazed and he was suddenly hit by a wave of vertigo.

[Don't react so much. If anything, I have to say that the show was quite entertaining,] the goddess of lust said, trying to lighten the mood, but it was as if her words couldn't get through to Alex.

[Tsk, bothersome] the goddess clicked her tongue in irritation.

[HEY! Stop being a pussy and get a fucking hold of yourself, don't make me regret my decision to take you as the carrier of my sin!] The goddess spoke in an angry tone.

The sudden outburst of the goddess caused startled Alex awake and after a moment, he regained his composure, although, judged by the frown on his face, he was still pretty troubled.

[Good, now where were-]

'Wait!' Alex interrupted the goddess. 'If what I've been told is true, then you had a meeting with the previous Alex, right?' Alex questioned.

Despite his best efforts, he couldn't seem to recall when the previous Alex had a meeting with the goddess of lust. According to what Lilia explained, he was supposed to meet the goddess so she could explain how her artifact functioned and inform him about the Sin's Game the first time he fused with her artifact.

[Yes, I did meet him,] the goddess answered in a nonchalant tone.

'Then, aren't you disturbed by my existence? After all, I'm the fusion of the previous Alex and another person, namely Jack, but the one you have chosen to carry your sin is simply the previous Alex.'

[Don't you think it's a bit late to ask such a question?]The goddess chuckled before replying in a light tone, [To answer your question, no, your existence doesn't bother me. Quite the contrary, the previous one couldn't do anything on his own anyway.]

Hearing the last part about how the previous guy couldn't achieve anything on his own, Alex felt a pang in his heart. After all, he was the fusion of that "previous guy" and Jack, and if the form of his soul is anything to go by, then he is more Alex than Jack. Not that he wasn't aware of this fact.

[Now, let's get back to your little problem,] the goddess spoke, her usual alluring voice returning.

Alex immediately cast aside the feeling of indignation he was experiencing and concentrated on hearing what the goddess was saying, aware that this might determine how his life unfolded.

[Like I said previously, your current situation isn't as disastrous as you think,] the goddess stated. [Sure, the souls of the lazy one and the soldier haven't completely fused, but it doesn't change anything for you right now. It will only matter if you don't find a way to perfectly bring them together,] the goddess explained.

[Ah, before you ask, yes, if the two parts were to separate before you find a way to bring them together,] the goddess mimicked the sound of an explosion and added in a theatrical tone:

[They explode, and you die in terrible, terrible pain.]

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