Along with her family, the Smudge's, Ellie Smudge lived in one of Scotland's most picturesque villages.
Living with Ellie was her busy mother, eccentric father, Rocky the cat, Benji the dog, and Gerald. Ellie had not yet met Gerald, as the family continued to use the old television and Monsieur McQuillan's Magnificent Mobile Circus had not arrived in the village.
Ellie's mum, Karen Smudge, had red hair, freckles and big round glasses. She was always busy doing something with energy and enthusiasm. Karen never stopped, cooking, cleaning, washing, knitting, vacuuming, scrubbing, sewing, gardening, the list would fill this book.
Karen had also made it her life's mission to ensure everyone pronounced the last name of the family correctly.
"It's Smewdge dear. Not Smudge." Karen would say indignantly.
Of course, it was pronounced smudge. But Karen really disliked any association with something which had become messily smeared, like a dirty mark on a surface. She could imagine some pretty bad examples too, the mental images of which, made her visibly gag every time she heard
"Mrs Smudge?"
Ellie Smudge (pronounced Smewdge), looked like a mini version of her mum. She was eight and a half. She had wild untameable red hair, freckles, gaps in her teeth and she was fairly short for her age. She inherited her mum's gusto. Like Karen, her favourite colour was emerald green and she had a lucky green dress which she loved to wear everywhere.
Ellie's dad, Arnold Smudge, was the biggest Smudge of them all. He had light brown hair, which was balding on top, and he was quite tall. He had big hands, big feet, and a big squishy round belly with a contagious Santa chuckle, which would cheer up the Grinch on Christmas day. His hugs were the stuff of legend and Ellie loved him.
It all started Saturday morning, just as the circus passed through the village. Ellie Smudge was sitting on the family sofa in the living room, watching Mr Gazoo on TV, while holding a large bowl of multi-coloured sweet twizzles drenched with ice-cold milk. Benji the dog was asleep on the sofa next to her while cuddling a cushion and dreaming of munching on a large bowl of sweet twizzles, his nose twitching in the direction of Ellie's bowl as he dozed.
Mr Gazoo is a very clumsy character with a large blue bow tie and a red squeaky nose. He usually has silly accidents and somehow always finishes his shows by getting a custard pie in his face. This episode had Ellie giggling like a hysterical Hyena.
Sometimes things happen because they were supposed to happen. Some people call it fate, and as fate would have it, Rocky the cat, a wild skittish black and white creature with teeth and claws, came hurtling into the living room as though a firecracker had gone off up his bum. Hissing, growling, spitting and generally waking up Benji with a fright.
Benji, a docile and loving Labradoodle who had a history of Rocky being mean to him, awoke in such a panic, his head knocked Ellie's elbow on just the right nerve to cause Ellie to involuntarily throw the bowl with some force. It sent the bowl of milky twizzles clean out of her hand, flying through the air towards the family TV. The contents seemed to separate from the bowl in mid-air, as it flew. It looked quite colourful.
Ellie watched helplessly as the bowl hit the television screen with a crack. Both the screen and bowl shattered instantly, while the air-born milk and twizzles splattered on top of the television and continued to drip inside the television.
Milk and televisions do not mix well. Suddenly, thick black smoke started to bellow from the back of the TV filling the room, then crackling sparks and a bright neon blue flash, quickly followed by the loudest BANG you have ever heard. The bang thundered throughout the house and at that same moment, all the electricity in the house went off. It was such a loud bang Rocky jumped high into the air and stuck to the ceiling in terror while Benji cowered behind the sofa cushion shivering next to Ellie.
The next moment, Ellie heard Arnold thumping down the stairs like a herd of escaping Elephants.
"What on Earth is going on?" exclaimed Arnold, as he rushed into the living room to survey what can only be described as a mad monkey's play ground.
The room looked like a bomb had gone off, which in some ways it had. Ellie was sat on the sofa, with Benji shivering behind a cushion next to her. Smoke bellowed towards the ceiling, and Rocky was nowhere in sight for smoke.
Milk and colourful twizzles on the carpet and up the walls. The television screen smashed with an occasional hiss as if something very hot was about to catch fire. Ellie looked visibly upset and she was still trying to understand what had happened.
A short time later, after the smoke had cleared, Karen had been busy rebuilding the living room and Arnold had disposed of the old broken TV. Ellie tried to explain what happened. It wasn't easy. Ellie did her best, while her parents sat on the sofa and listened. As Ellie heard herself reciting events, it all sounded quite unbelievable. Arnold rested his face in his hands for a moment, and then he said softly,
"We needed a new telly anyway. The old one was on its way out."
He looked at Karen and then at Ellie. They both watched Arnold as his expression changed from a pained expression to one of confused excitement
"Do you know what this means?" He said suddenly
"It means, I can finally get one of those super-duper smarter than your average dad, full action, 3D satellite receptive, ultra-high gamma radiation televisions I've always wanted!"
Ellie felt slightly confused, as a grin of pure joy spread across her father's face. Karen got up from the sofa and walked into the kitchen to make a cup of tea while she recovered from the shock of Arnold's sudden inspiration.
"I can see it now Ellie." he continued as the excitement built in his voice
"I'll be able to see the ball when watching football and snooker balls will look less like fuzzy smudges and colour too!". He glanced at Ellie, who looked somewhat uninspired, then hastily added
"and that Gaboo on those shows you like, will look and sound even funnier. In fact, we won't need those fuzzy subtitles anymore." as if trying to sell the idea to his daughter. Ellie was already sold. They needed a TV.
Arnold stood up abruptly and started to hunt for his car keys with some urgency. While he hunted in bowls, draws and cupboards, he said
"How about we go get one of those new televisions right now Ellie? Want to come with me?"
Karen's hand appeared holding the car keys.
Ellie expressed her uncertainty about wearing her pyjamas to the store. But twenty minutes later Ellie was dressed, her teeth were cleaned, her hair was under control and Rocky, although still rigid, had finally fallen from the ceiling. Ellie and her dad were in the car on their way to the electrical shop to buy a brand-new television.
Arnold's excitement must have been contagious. Ellie was starting to feel excited to see all the different tellies in the store and she was no longer feeling upset about the mornings disaster.
While all of this was happening in the Smudge household, the circus had stopped in a field just outside the village. There was some commotion in the early hours, as several small figures dressed in brown suits, sneaked into one of the caravans decorated with mystical paintings, then left carrying a large square object wrapped in a brown blanket.