The constant jangling and chattering of the long silver chain sang like a tormenting symphony, accompanying every movement I made. I could feel the rough iron links scraping against my naked wrist as I paced around the confined space of my room.
I remember clearly when my father told me I was betrothed to someone even before I was born. Marriage felt more like a prison sentence than I could bear. Fear gripped my heart, and for my safety, I fled from the palace. But unfortunately, I was caught by guards who brought me back to my father. He ordered me to be thrown into this cell, with manacles on my wrists, locking me away from the world.
"You won't ruin my plans," he had growled in rage.
I was young then, and I had no idea why I would ruin my father's plans. Even now, as I have grown into a beautiful lady, I still don't understand. Or perhaps I do.
My narrow window faced the vast and beautiful garden of our castle. The view was hidden away from the world. Few people came here, except for the gardener who tended to the garden, keeping it beautiful at all times. Sometimes, my mother would sneak around without my father's knowledge. I was supposed to be hidden away where no one could see me. My father couldn't see me, unless there would be deadly consequences.
I stood silently, watching as the unchanging strip of morning sky melted into the hot noon. The chirping of birds and other little creatures was gone, replaced by muffled echoes from a distant life I was cut off from. I couldn't resent my father more for taking away my freedom. I hate him.
Just then, the creaking open and shutting close of the heavy door broke my train of thought. I whirled around to see a familiar guard entering, and my whole being stiffened.
I noticed the gleam in his eyes as he approached—a look I had dreaded so much. He inched forward slowly, like a predator waiting to devour its prey.
"Good day, princess." Though his words seemed harmless, an icy feeling had already crawled up my spine. Memories of the last visit stirred in my head, and terror gripped my heart. Rough hands pinning me down on the cold floor, muffled sobs in the dark. No, I couldn't let him do that to me again.
Instinctively, I backed away until my back hit the brick wall behind me. If there is a God, please save me. The guard didn't stop; I could see the evil smirk that curled his lips as he stood in front of me.
With my heart shaking and swelling in fear, I wrapped my hands around my body and shook my head incessantly.
"Please... Don't touch me..." I began to cry.
"Why shouldn't I, princess?" he huffed and brought his stinky fingers to my face, caressing my jawline while I cringed. "You're really beautiful, and I wanted nothing else than to…"
"Please, stop it...!" I snapped at him, terror clutching at my heart. I knew what he wanted to say, and I wished the ground would open and swallow me whole. Dear Lord, please help me.
I tried to move away, but he grabbed me by my shoulders and slammed me against the wall, harshly, making a wince escape my lips.
"Oh, don't cry. Just give up already, princess," he spoke in a tone that sent shivers down my spine.
Just then, the key jingled from behind the door. The guard's eyes snapped to the door, and a frown settled on his ugly face. "Another time, princess," he muttered before taking his leave.
My knees gave way as relief washed over me.
The door swung open again, and a different guard walked in. Without saying anything, he began to uncuff me. Uneasiness prowled through me, setting every nerve on edge. What are they playing to do to me?
"Your Majesty wants to see you," he finally said. I sighed with little relief.
Finally, I would be able to see the outside of my room.
As I strode down, I could feel my heart beating faster in my chest. My footsteps became heavy and loud, echoing in the silent hallways, letting my father know that I was coming.
"Here," the guard slightly pushed me forward as we reached the door of the throne hall.
The door opened, and a shiver ran down my spine when my eyes met my father's. I was scared of him.
The guard stayed behind, and I moved forward, my legs obviously trembling and my heart beating faster at the sight of my father. I managed to look at his side and saw my mother. The horrifying look on her face told me that something was wrong. I wondered, what could it be this time?
I fell on my knees once I reached the throne seat. That was something my father warned me to do anytime he called.
"Finally, you are here," he grunted with no interest.
"I... I didn't mean to keep you waiting, father," I tried to sound neutral, not letting my fear show in my tone.
"Hmm," was his short reply before he continued.
"Be prepared. You will be getting married tonight," he announced.
I felt my chest tighten at the news and quickly glanced up at my father with tears in my eyes. Maybe I wasn't hearing right. Yes, I wasn't.
"Y-Yes, father?" I asked, needing to confirm if I was hearing things.
And I regretted asking when I saw the deadly look on my father's face.
"I said you're getting married! What's so hard for you to understand, Alanora? Or have you also become deaf?!" He boomed across the room, and I trembled.
"Your Majesty... don't you think she is too young to..."
"Layla!" He sharply interrupted my mother, and she shook, quickly looking away. She was too scared to say anything.
"You better keep your mouth shut, woman," my father continued with the same tone.
I was getting married. This was the day I had been dreading so much in my life. I didn't want to get married when I knew nothing about the person I was going to spend the rest of my life with. I didn't want to get married, even though my father told me that I was betrothed to someone. What if the person I was marrying was worse than my father? What would I do?
No. No... I shook my head. "Father... I-I can't get married," I voiced my thoughts out, knowing full well that my father was going to kill me for challenging him.
He glared at me as though he was about to tell the guard to throw me out or drag me to my room.
"Don't make me go back on my words, Alanora. Now get out of here!" my father spoke demandingly through gritted teeth.
A tear rolled down my cheek as I quickly got up and walked out of the hall.
I strode down the hallway, the guard trailing behind me. I couldn't believe what I had just heard. I was shocked, even though I already knew the day was coming, but I never thought it would be this early. I was still barely nineteen.
I entered my room and walked straight to my bed, waiting for the guard to handcuff me, but he didn't. He simply locked the door and left me alone.
No... I can't get married. I stood up and walked to the window. I was going to jump down from here, even though I might fall and hit my head. I would rather die than get married.
Yes, I was going to take my own life. I climbed onto the window ledge. Now I was crouching on the window, my legs shaking. This was going to be the end of everything.
I closed my eyes and was about to jump down when I heard my mother's voice. "Alanora..." I froze.
"M-Mother?" I quickly climbed down and ran to my mother, wrapping my hands around her as I buried my head in her chest, letting all the tears flow out.
"Mother... please... I don't want to get married..." I cried, while she kept patting my head.
"I'm sorry, my baby. I wish there was something I could do about it... I'm sorry..." her voice cracked as if she was holding back her own tears.
I knew there was nothing she could do. But I wished there was.
I broke the hug and looked up at her sorrowful gaze.
"I'm sorry... for bringing you into this type of life," she said, and a tear rolled down her eyes.
I just kept staring at her as the tears continued to flow out, not knowing how to react to her words. My mother had just apologized for giving birth to me. I could see the fear and concern in her eyes. Then I began to wonder, who was this man I was marrying?