Abel's attempt to understand my hurt came as an unexpected surprise to me. Even though we were now married, I knew I meant nothing to him. I knew how much he loved his space. I knew how irritated he felt towards me for sharing that same space. For being a part of his life, and so, therefore, I'd expected cruelty. Snide remarks, shouting at any slight provocation, hatred... I'd expected all of it. But this, this kindness? This shocking concern...was any of it genuine at all? Was it borne out of pity? Did he really care? I didn't like it. I wanted him to hate me just like the rest, not care for me.
And what was that sizzling heat that pooled between my legs when he held me down? My body had never betrayed me until today. Until that very moment. I made a mental note to avoid every circumstance where he'd be anywhere close to me. I couldn't trust my body around him at all.
