Kathy....
I had just hung up the phone after a long call with my client when I heard the familiar crack of my manager's door behind me. There was a brief pause to the sound of my colleagues busily typing away as her footsteps approached my desk.
"Kathy, I need you in my office for a quick meeting," her commanding presence loomed over me.
The wondering looks on my colleagues' faces didn't help my nerves as I slowly got up from my desk. I couldn't think of a single reason why I'd be 'called into the principal's office' since I'd done nothing but hit all my targets for the past year. But still, that nagging voice in the back of my head wouldn't quiet down.
"Am I in some kind of trouble?" I peeked my head through the door to my manager's office before walking in.
"Not at all," she said, laughing softly. Probably because I looked like a nervous wreck. "Quite the opposite, really. Take a seat."
A wave of relief washed over me and I went to sit down. She offered me a glass of water and I took a small sip, hoping it would have a calming effect. Then I waited, my fingers drumming the side of my chair.
"How do you feel about relocating to New York?" Straight to the point. Just like that. A small half-smile played on the corner of her lips.
"New York?" I nearly spat out my water. "You're asking if I'd move to New York?"
My manager nodded. "Your performance metrics for this quarter have been excellent, Kathy. There's a position that just opened up in our New York office and I told upper management you'd be perfect for it."
I swallowed the shocked lump in my throat, mind reeling from the news. "Starting immediately?"
"Yes," she noticed the unsure expression on my face. "Listen, I know it's a big decision, but you'll be working directly with the CEO which is great for your career. Throw in an attractive joining bonus and a 15k raise…"
"Fifteen thousand dollars?" I gripped the edge of her desk, suddenly dizzy.
My annual income was already the highest it had ever been right now, and my small-town brain could barely figure the instant raise she was talking about. Then there was the question about the city itself. I chewed on my lip as I considered her words. New York sounded so exciting but also daunting and big. I'd never traveled outside of New Jersey before. It would be a whole new start for me. A whole new life.
Then it dawned on me. I would start anewlife. These last few months had really taken a toll on me. I'd be leaving behind the scars of a messy break-up with my cheating ex and the wound from a heartbreak that kept me holed up in my apartment…except when I was burying myself in work.
Maybe a change of setting was exactly what I needed.
"I'll take it," I said, a surge of unexplainable confidence calming my nerves.
"You will?" My supervisor seemed pleasantly surprised by how fast I had made the decision.
Frankly, I never thought I'd do something like this either. When I was dating my ex-boyfriend, he would always discourage me from taking trips outside of town.
'What's the point? You can stay at home. I'm here and that's all that should matter to you.'
And since I was totally in love with him, I listened. Now that he was gone, I knew I had to make changes and step out of my comfort zone.
"I'm sure," I said, and the corners of my lips curved upwards into a smile. "I'll move to New York."
Accepting this new position felt like a whirlwind but it was a step in the right direction. It had to be. Before I knew it, I was packing my bags and getting on the next flight out.
"We're going to miss you so much," my mother hugged me tightly as I was about to board.
"I'm going to miss you, too," I replied, feeling emotional.
My mother and I were very close, especially after a drunk driver took my father from us when I was a kid. I was too young to understand the grief of losing a parent back then, but even so, my mother made sure that I never felt his absence. She tried her best to be there for me in every important moment of my life. So, saying goodbye to her at the airport was a bittersweet experience.
"I'll call you every day," I promised, before giving her a final kiss on her cheek.
This was the start of a new chapter in my life. One I was going into completely alone.