On a certain day in the now quite lively"God's Garden".
"I-it's bad, Saintess-sama?!"
It all started when the pig welcomed me with a loud shout just as I got back.
"What's wrong? Why are you panicking?" I knitted my brows, giving him a questioning look.
The pig looked around before whispering into my ear, "T-there seems to be 'breast milk thief' on the loose…"
"..." Hearing that I blinked two or three times then directed a disdainful look at the pig and said, "You finally crossed the line, huh?"
"No, it's not me?! O-or rather, do I look like someone who would do something like that?!"
I answered instantly, "Yeah. I mean, you're the kind of person who'll first shout 'Who's farted?!' when you fart in a crowd of people, aren't you?"
"That's a cruel prejudice?!"
I sighed then asked the shocked pig, "Then again, if you were the culprit, you wouldn't have gone out of your way to spread your deed. I'm still suspicious of you, but I'll trust you for now. So, whose breast milk was stolen? Arcadia? Or Magmell?"
"No, it seems that everyone has been victimized… before anyone knew it, all the children were full."
...Mm?
"Huh, what are you talking about? Did they leave something else in exchange for stealing the breast milk?"
"No, it seems that someone has been breastfeeding the children without permission and everyone is feeling uncomfortable because their breasts are overly full."
"???"
Eh, what is this pig talking about?
"You mean, someone has been feeding the children the stored breast milk without permission?"
"Eh, is that so?!"
"No, you said that?!"
"Huh?"
"Huh?"
After a beat.
""Huh?""
◇
I seriously couldn't understand what was going on, so I had him explain the situation in detail, and it turned out that there had been a 'breastfeeding time thief' who had been breastfeeding the children without permission when the mothers took their eyes off them for a moment.
I'd like to ask him why would he call it 'breast milk thief' but I didn't want to stress my unborn child with such a useless thing, so I chose to let it slide.
You'd better be grateful, pig.
"Breastfeeding without permission, huh? Only one person comes to mind who'd do something like that."
"Is it Magmell-sama, after all?! I mean, her breasts have gotten even bigger?!"
"No, why are you getting excited… or rather, your face is too close?!"
After pushing back the pig's face who was breathing roughly as he leaned toward me, I said, "Not her. No matter how big her breasts get, she wouldn't breastfeed a child without their mother's permission. There's only one person—or should I say, only one god, who would do something so crazy."
"D-don't tell me…?!" The pig said with a startled look "I-is it Terra-sama…?!"
"You… you'd better stop making decisions based on breast size," after giving him an amazed stare, I sighed and said to the pig. "I'm talking about Phinis-sama… She thinks all Exa's babies as hers, after all…"
Surely, once my baby was born she would be like "Cute child… my cute child…" and then proceeded to breastfeed them.
I mean, not that I'd mind it, but I hoped she'd at least ask for my permission…
Well, even if I didn't give her my permission, she'd still do it, anyway… as I released another sigh, the pig asked with a solemn expression, "Saintess-sama, may I have the honor of becoming your slightly big baby…?"
"Right, it may be my role to deal with you to prevent future troubles."
"Eeek?!"