MO RAN SAID NOTHING for a long interval; the jut of his throat
merely bobbed as he swallowed. He was drowning in torrential desire,
clinging desperately to a piece of driftwood to keep himself afloat as he
thought in a stutter:
R-respect and cherish him.
Respect as in respect and cherish, cherish as in respect and cherish.
Do not defile, do not harm, do not have any unnecessary feelings, and
definitely do not commit those outrageous acts he had committed in the past
life to humiliate his shizun.
As the inside of his chest burned like hot lava, Mo Ran silently
repeated that litany four or five times before he finally had wits enough to
step into the room with feigned composure and greet Chu Wanning with a
smile. "Shizun, so you were here after all… Why didn't you say
something?"
"Just woke up," Chu Wanning replied dryly.
The dryness was no joke: his throat was dry, and so too was his
desire. So dry that a single stray spark might set off an uncontrollable blaze.
Mo Ran was holding a heavy, five-layered bamboo food box. He
thought about putting it on the table, but it was covered in a mess of files,
drills, joinery, nails, and all manner of blueprints. There was no other option
but to carry the box to Chu Wanning's bed.
Chu Wanning's morning grumpiness seemed even worse today than
usual; he was visibly agitated as he glanced at Mo Ran and snapped, "What
do you want?"
"Shizun woke up pretty late. There's not much food left at Mengpo
Hall now. I had nothing else to do, so I made breakfast to share with
Shizun."
He opened the box as he spoke and began to unpack it. The topmost
level held a plate of sauteed mushrooms, the next a plate of tender, stir-fried
celtuce with water chestnuts, then silk-thread rolls and honey-glazed sweet
lotus root, and on the very bottom were two bowls of rice, each grain plump
and translucent, as well as a bowl of bamboo shoot and ham soup.
Two bowls of rice… Chu Wanning was a little speechless—
did Mo Ran really think he was that much of a glutton?
"The table is a little messy…does Shizun want to eat in bed, or should
I tidy the table and move the food over?"
Of course Chu Wanning didn't like eating in bed, but the quilt was the
only thing hiding his yet-to-subside arousal from view. He wavered
between decorum and dignity, then firmly chose the latter. "There are too
many things on the table, it'll take too long to tidy up. I'll eat here."
Mo Ran nodded with a smile. "Okay."
It must be said that Mo Ran was quite a skilled cook. He'd been good
five years ago; now, he was easily better than most ordinary chefs. What's
more, Mo Ran also somehow knew Chu Wanning's tastes incredibly well.
He knew that Chu Wanning didn't really like congee in the morning, made
sure to pick straw mushrooms for the mushroom dish, stuffed the silkthread rolls with sweet potato rather than bean paste, used only the tenderest
tips of the bamboo shoots, and chose a cut of ham with a generous amount
of fat, red and white streaked like dusky clouds across the horizon…
Mo Ran had never asked him what he liked to eat, yet he had made
everything just right, as if they'd already lived together for many years.
Chu Wanning was delighted with the meal. Though he maintained his
cool expression, his chopsticks never stopped shoveling for even a moment.
When he finished the last sip of the soup and looked up, he saw Mo Ran
sitting at the edge of the bed with one foot propped on a chair nearby, cheek
in hand as he watched him with a faint smile.
"What is it?" Chu Wanning instinctively took out a handkerchief to
wipe his mouth. "Is there something on my face…"
"Nope," Mo Ran said, "I'm just happy to see Shizun liked the food."
A little perturbed, Chu Wanning said in mild tones, "It was good, but
there was too much rice. One bowl will do next time."
Mo Ran seemed like he was about to say something, but in the end
decided to let it lie. He grinned at him instead, revealing a row of neat,
pearly teeth. "Got it."
What a dummy this man was. So careful and meticulous about serious
things, but absolutely oblivious when it came to the day-to-day. He had
completely failed to notice that there were two pairs of chopsticks at the
bottom of the box. He'd eaten two servings of food all by himself, then
turned around to tell him that there was too much, that he was a bit
stuffed…
The more Mo Ran thought about it the funnier it became, until he put
a hand to his brow and let his lashes droop as they quivered with laughter.
"What's so funny?"
"Nothing, nothing." Mo Ran didn't want to embarrass him—his
shizun valued his pride above all else, after all—so he quickly changed the
subject. "Shizun, I just remembered something that I forgot to ask you
about yesterday."
"What is it?"
"On my way back, I heard that Great Master Huaizui left the day
before you came out of seclusion."
"Mn, correct."
"So you didn't even see him after waking up, right?"
"I did not."
Mo Ran sighed. "Then it's not a matter of Shizun being discourteous
at all. I overheard some people on the outside saying that Shizun had no
manners, that even though Great Master Huaizui had spent the last five
years bringing Shizun back to life, he didn't even get a thanks for his
trouble. But if the great master left first himself, it'd be totally unreasonable
to expect Shizun to run over to Wubei Temple the instant he woke up, to
kneel outside shedding tears of gratitude or something. Those gossips are so
annoying. Now that we've cleared that up, I'll have Uncle address it at
tomorrow's morning assembly—"
"No need," Chu Wanning interjected.
"Why not?"
Chu Wanning paused. "The great master and I have long since burned
our bridges," he said. "I wouldn't have thanked him even if he were still
here when I woke up."
Mo Ran was taken aback. "How come? I know Shizun chose to leave
the temple of your own volition and had already severed the master-disciple
relationship with Great Master Huaizui, but he still came to your rescue in
your time of need, and—"
"Things between him and me are hard to explain," Chu Wanning cut
in. "Nor do I care to discuss it. If people want to call me a cold-blooded
ingrate with no conscience, then so be it. It's only the truth."
"How is that the truth?" Mo Ran fretted. "You're clearly—you're
clearly not that kind of person!"
Chu Wanning's head snapped up and his expression iced over, blood
pumping like a dragon touched on its inverted scale. "Mo Ran," he said,
"What do you even know about me?"
"I—" Mo Ran studied Chu Wanning's bright eyes, cold as frost. Here
was a man who never let his guard down, who always kept his distance. For
a moment, he wanted nothing more than to disregard all consequences and
say, I know. I know a lot of things about you. I understand, and even if there
are some things in your past I don't know about, I'm willing to listen, to
share the burden with you. Don't just keep everything to yourself, locked
away behind those walls. Aren't you tired? Isn't it difficult?
But what right did he have to say any of that? He was Chu Wanning's
disciple. Be not impetuous. Be not irreverent.
In the end, Mo Ran said nothing.
Several seconds passed in silence, and Chu Wanning's tense frame,
taut as a bowstring, finally relaxed by degrees. He sighed, as if depleted,
and said, "People are not saints, and one cannot fight against fate. Certain
things can't be changed even if you want them to be. Forget it; don't bring
up Master Huaizui to me anymore. You may leave; I'm going to change."
"…Yes." Mo Ran quietly collected the meal box, his head hanging.
As he reached the door, he suddenly asked, "Shizun, you're not mad at me,
are you?"
Chu Wanning shot him a glare. "Why would I be mad at you?"
Mo Ran beamed brightly. "That's good, that's good. Then can I come
again tomorrow?"
"Suit yourself." Then, as if something had just occurred to him, Chu
Wanning added, "In the future, there's no need to say things like 'I'm
coming in.'"
Mo Ran blinked. "Why not?"
"You're going to come in anyway! What's the point in saying
something like that?!" Chu Wanning was getting worked up again, but
whether it was due to Mo Ran's untimely bout of purity or his own uselessly
reddened face was anyone's guess.
Chu Wanning didn't get out of bed until after the still-perplexed
Mo Ran had left. He didn't bother with shoes, but padded barefoot to the
bookcase and removed a bamboo scroll. He unrolled it and stared at the
words written there with an unreadable expression for long, silent minutes.
Huaizui had left this bamboo scroll by his pillow before leaving, with
a spell that prevented anyone aside from Chu Wanning from opening it. The
writing on the front was neat and straight, and read, Confidential. For Chugongzi only.
His own teacher calling him Chu-gongzi. Ridiculous.
The letter was neither long nor short. It listed some things Chu
Wanning should be mindful of after waking up, before going to great length
"entreating" him to do one thing.
Great Master Huaizui asked Chu Wanning to meet him at
Dragonblood Mountain near Wubei Temple when he had recovered. He had
written, in earnest terms, that he was getting on in years and was not long
for the world, and that he felt immense guilt over certain things of the past.
This old monk hopes to speak with you before his passing. You still
carry that old injury, and on hearing that its adverse effects force you to go
into seclusion for ten days every seven years, this old monk feels truly
remorseful. If you are willing to come to Dragonblood Mountain, it can be
healed. However, the healing spell carries its own risks. You must also
bring along a disciple with dual wood- and fire-element spiritual energy to
stabilize the array.
Old injury… Dragonblood Mountain…
Chu Wanning's brow furrowed deep, and his nails nearly drew blood
from his palm. Healed? How? Something once destroyed, once lost, those
one hundred and sixty-four days spent at Dragonblood Mountain—how
could any of it ever be recovered? How masterly did Huaizui think he was,
that he could smooth out a scar this deep?!
His eyes snapped open as golden light crackled in his palm. The
sturdy mottled bamboo of the letter instantly shattered into powder in his
hand and puffed into the air.
He would never set so much as a single foot into Wubei Temple for as
long as he lived. Nor would he refer to Huaizui as Shizun ever again.
Four days had passed in the blink of an eye since Chu Wanning came
out of seclusion. On the fourth day, Xue Zhengyong called him to Loyalty
Hall and handed him a letter of commission. Chu Wanning shook open the
letter and read the few simple lines written on it, then looked up and said, "I
think you gave me the wrong one."
"Huh?" Xue Zhengyong took the letter and read over it again himself,
then replied, "Nope, this is it."
Chu Wanning narrowed his eyes. "It says they need help with the
harvest at Yuliang Village."
"What, do you not know how?"
Chu Wanning's glare intensified.
Xue Zhengyong's eyes went wide. "Wait, you seriously don't know
how?!"
Backed into a corner by this line of questioning, Chu Wanning
seethed. "Isn't there anything normal, like putting down demons or
whatnot?"
Xue Zhengyong said, "Y'know, things have been pretty peaceful
lately, so there actually aren't any places troubled by demons right now.
Aiya, it'll be fine! Ran-er's going with you, so you can just sit on the
sidelines and take it easy while he does all the work. Harvesting some rice
or threshing some millet's no big deal to the young and spry."
Chu Wanning's inky brows drew low. "Since when did Sisheng Peak
start taking odd jobs like these?"
"Since…always? Like when Granny Wang's cat gets stuck in a tree in
Wuchang Town, Shi Mei goes to get it down. It's just that there are usually
tougher issues to deal with, so I never bothered you with the small ones,"
Xue Zhengyong said. "Besides, didn't you just wake up? I was gonna send
someone else, but I thought you'd be bored just sitting around."
"But even then I don't… I don't want to harvest rice." Chu Wanning
narrowly avoided blurting out that he didn't know how to harvest rice.
"Like I said, Ran-er will be there to help you out," Xue Zhengyong
insisted. "Just consider it a chance to relax and stroll around a bit."
"Can I not relax and stroll around just fine without taking an
assignment?"
"I mean, I guess." Xue Zhengyong scratched his head. "But Yuliang
Village is pretty close to Butterfly Town and that Heavenly Rift Ran-er
patched up last time. He's not you, after all, so why don't you check on it
while you're there and see if there's anything that needs reinforcing?"
Only then did Chu Wanning finally see a need for him to go. He took
the letter without another word and turned to leave Loyalty Hall.