Rong Jiu was of course referring to Mo Ran's actions on that first
day of his reborn life, when he had been full of resentment. Thinking back on
it now, while it was true that Rong Jiu had wronged him in the last lifetime,
in which he had teamed up with Chang-gongzi to scheme against Mo Ran's
life, none of that had happened in this one. This Rong Jiu hadn't yet gotten
that far in his plot with Chang-gongzi, and Mo Ran really had no good
explanation for having taken his money and things back then.
That being the case, Mo Ran didn't want to fight. "It was my bad," he
said. "Everything I took from you that day, I'll return in the future."
"And how do you intend to do that?" Rong Jiu asked. "Or rather, what
good would money and earthly treasures do me now?"
Mo Ran could think of nothing to say.
"You can return the bracelets and pearls to me, but what about my
life?"
"What?" Mo Ran was caught off guard. "Your life?"
"Yes, my life." Rong Jiu's expression clouded over, the topic still
clearly a raw wound in his heart. "Do you know how I died?"
Mo Ran did not reply.
Rong Jiu had likely been holding this in for quite some time, and now
that the lid was lifted, the steam beneath burst out in a torrent. His face
flashed with a rage that slowly grew twisted, and before Mo Ran could say a
word, he continued wretchedly, "That Chang guy was ruthless. Once you cast
me aside, I had no further value to him. He fed me some lies about how he
really, truly liked me, but his family objected because I was a prostitute in a
brothel, not clean, and said it'd be best if we stopped seeing each other. I
was blind back then. I thought his feelings were sincere, that he had no
choice, that his parents made him…bah! I can't believe I fell for that
garbage!"
"Well, what are you blaming me for," Mo Ran said. "Shouldn't you
blame that Chang guy?"
"Why shouldn't I blame you?" Rong Jiu snapped angrily, "I had
enough saved up to buy my freedom, and you stole it. I was too miserable to
stay at the brothel any longer, but I couldn't leave without money, so I ran
away in secret. If you hadn't robbed me, I wouldn't have ended up like this!"
"You ran away?"
"That's right, I ran away. I ran to his place." Rong Jiu's tone was
hateful. "But that Chang guy wouldn't open the door for me, even when the
people the brothel sent after me were closing in. All my struggles were futile
in the end. They dragged me back there, beat me to a pulp, and locked me
up."
"But that Chang character said you died when you went to visit
relatives in Butterfly Town and the ghost realm barrier broke," Mo Ran
muttered.
"Hah!" There was a shade of mockery on Rong Jiu's androgynous
face. "How shameless can he be. Relatives? What relatives could I possibly
have in Butterfly Town!"
Mo Ran had no reply to that.
"What's that you said about living under a knife? I'll tell you what it
means to live under a knife!" Rong Jiu was getting more and more worked
up, his features more and more twisted. In that moment, he truly looked like a
vicious ghost. "I'll tell you how I died! You and all my other dear patrons!
Ha ha—patrons!
"I was locked up in the brothel for ages without food, starving and
suffering. Not a soul cared whether I lived or died. Days passed like that. I
was just about to give up hope when that Chang guy turned up again. He came
crying, telling me he couldn't let me in that day because his parents were in a
bad mood and he was afraid if he did, they'd have the servants beat me to
death!"
Mo Ran shook his head. It was obviously a lie. "Surely you didn't
believe him?"
"No." There were motes of light quivering in Rong Jiu's eyes.
"I believed him."
Mo Ran was speechless.
"I believed him." Rong Jiu bared his teeth and smiled through his
resentment, the corners of his mouth curling. "Why wouldn't I? Doubt is the
privilege of those with a way out. What am I but a peddler of flesh? If I
didn't believe whatever people threw at me, how could I survive?" He
paused. "That Chang guy said he would be true to his word and take me into
his home, but that his parents couldn't accept me just yet. So he asked me to
go with him to a nearby town and live there for a short time first."
"Butterfly Town?"
"Yes. Butterfly Town."
Mo Ran's expression darkened. He already knew where this was
headed.
Sure enough, Rong Jiu continued, "So I happily packed my things.
Actually, there wasn't much to pack, since you stole everything I earned
selling my body all those years on a lark. But that's all right, I thought at the
time, I have Chang-gongzi now. Heh…" He was silent for a spell, his lips
twitching with a soft snicker. Then he hatefully spat out the name again.
"Chang-gongzi."
"So, he tricked you into going to Butterfly Town and then killed you
there?"
Rong Jiu paused again. "No." He wore a savage smile, and bitterness
flickered in his eyes. "He wasn't the one who killed me. It was all of you,
who blocked my paths one by one until I had no choice but to accompany him
on that shady venture. It was all of you. It was all of you who killed me."
Rong Jiu took a deep breath. "When we arrived at Butterfly Town, I
followed the Chang guy to a large manor. It was quiet and empty, and there
were no servants. He said he hadn't had a chance to decorate yet and told me
to stay there and rest while he went out to make some purchases. So I stayed
and waited. After a while, he came back with some man—"
Upon hearing this, Mo Ran's expression shifted. "Did you see his
face?"
"No," said Rong Jiu. "He wore a mask and a cloak with the hood
pulled up. I couldn't see his face at all… And then I saw that Chang guy
kneel before him, groveling even more pathetically than I do when I entertain
guests. If he could have seen himself in a mirror just then—disgusting. He
told the man I had residual wood elemental spiritual essence on me or some
such thing, that I'd been intimate with you before—a good offering.
Something like that. Who knows, I'm not a cultivator, nor do I want to be. I
don't know what they were on about."
But Mo Ran felt his scalp go numb. It was true that he had been
intimate with Rong Jiu before, and that would have left traces of wood
elemental spiritual essence in his body. That fake Gouchen had been looking
for a suitable replacement for the Heart-Pluck Willow. Although the lingering
spiritual energy would be very faint, it would be pure—indeed suitable for
use in spells.
"There's not much to say about what happened next." Rong Jiu's
usually easygoing expression now held a bone-chilling coldness. "As Mogongzi can see, I died."
If the Mo Ran before him had been that of the past life, or even the Mo
Ran recently reborn, he would've scoffed and mocked, "So what if you died,
what's it to me?"
But as he was now, Mo Ran couldn't find it in him to laugh. He did
loathe Rong Jiu, and Rong Jiu was unscrupulous, a man who had gone so far
as to plot his death in the last lifetime. But though he had been physically
intimate with Rong Jiu before, never had they had an open, honest talk.
Hearing such plain-spoken admissions from Rong Jiu now, down here in the
underworld, filled Mo Ran with a hundred mixed emotions. He mulled it
over and came to a decision: There was no way to untangle all these
countless threads of bygone affairs. He might as well just let it go. He sighed.
"I'm sorry about everything, Rong Jiu."
Rong Jiu was caught off guard. Not once in his whole life had anyone
said sorry to him. He looked Mo Ran over with wide eyes, like he didn't
recognize him. "Even if you say that, I'm still not going to tell you where to
find that man in the drawing."
"This has nothing to do with the drawing."
Rong Jiu was still for a while, his head lowered. He suddenly spoke:
"Mo-gongzi, did you know—Chang-gongzi was plotting with me to kill you
and steal your cultivation."
"I know."
"You…you know?"
Mo Ran nodded. "I know."
Rong Jiu stared with blank eyes. Then he said resentfully, "That Chang
bastard must've ratted me out!" His head snapped back up, eyes aflame with
hatred. "If I'd known it would end this way, I would've listened to him and
killed you. At least then I might've enjoyed a good life, instead of dying
miserably like I did."
Mo Ran gazed at him. "Do you always do whatever other people tell
you to?"
"So what if I do?" Rong Jiu asked. "All I wanted was to live well. I
sold my body, but what's wrong with that? Is it any different from selling fish
or meat? It's merely a means to make a living. I knew all you young masters
looked down on me, but it hardly mattered. What's the point of stuff like
reputation and dignity? I'd rather have good wine and good meat. That's why,
if I could've killed you back then and saved myself, why shouldn't I have?"
Mo Ran's lips moved slightly. He thought to retort, but then he
remembered what he himself had done in his past life, and found he had no
rebuttal to these words.
"People kill animals and eat their flesh in order to live," Rong Jiu
spat, "so what's wrong with killing people in order to live?"
Mo Ran sighed. "Is there any meaning in living like that?" he
murmured. The question was directed at Rong Jiu as much as it was at his
past self, the one who sat high on his throne a lifetime ago.
"I don't know. I don't know what meaning is," Rong Jiu said dully. "I
was sixteen when I was sold into the brothel, and my first customer was a
cultivator in his fifties. What gives something meaning? I wouldn't know.
When I was alive, all I wanted was money. Money could buy my freedom,
and then I wouldn't have to bow and simper to anybody anymore. But I never
got it, even until death, thanks to you beasts."
A long silence. "So if you could do it all over, you'd help that Chang
fellow murder me?" Mo Ran finally asked.
"That's right."
"All right then, if I could do it over, I'd still turn around and filch all
your money just to screw you over."
"You—!" In his anger, the faint blush on Rong Jiu's cheeks from the
rouge flower was all the more vivid. His body swayed for a second before
he slowly mastered himself. A minute passed. Rong Jiu was aware that he'd
lost his composure. He reached up to tuck a few errant strands of hair into
place, then pulled himself together and schooled his features into their usual
coy smile. Still, anger flickered in his gaze. "You can say what you want. I
can make my own way."
"Enjoy your time in the underworld, then."
Rong Jiu narrowed his eyes. "I fully intend to. All I have to do is lie
back on the bed and I'll be spared the misery of reincarnation for the rest of
eternity. I know a good deal when I see it. Unlike those idiots back there, I'm
more than willing."
Mo Ran's lips tugged up in a brief smile. "But Rong Jiu, those soldiers
work for the Fourth Ghost King. Whether you live, whether you stay—it all
hinges on his pleasure."
Rong Jiu flinched. He was immediately on guard, staring at Mo Ran
with those pretty eyes of his. "What are you trying to say?"
Mo Ran would have had no desire to go on quarreling with him even if
the situation had been otherwise. But though Rong Jiu had a docile
temperament, once he began to hate someone, he was unrelenting. Mo Ran
did his utmost to remain calm as he spoke. "You may think the person in the
drawing is average, but I think he's great. Beauty is in the eye of the
beholder, after all. Who's to say the ghost king won't take a shine to him?"
"With a frigid face like that? Who'd be into him?"
"You never know," Mo Ran said. "If the ghost king liked the soft type,
then why didn't he pick you?"
Rong Jiu fell silent, but his expression darkened somewhat.
"He has a fierce temper," Mo Ran pressed. "If he gets picked, he'll
probably flip the entire underworld upside down. And when the time comes
to assign blame, the Fourth Ghost King's people definitely won't get off easy
—some of those soldiers will hang for sure. If you wanna make like a
climbing vine, at least climb a sturdy tree. If the tree topples over when
you've barely coiled yourself around it, losing your support will be the least
of your worries. Chances are you'll get uprooted right along with it, and
that'll be a soul-scattering kind of end."
Rong Jiu's already pale face seemed to blanch further. But still he
persisted, coy yet vicious: "I doubt any of that will happen."
Mo Ran said nothing.
"All right, Mo-gongzi, let's bet on it. I just can't stand to see you doing
better than me."
A few moments passed in silence. Then Mo Ran turned vicious as
well, his eyes fixed on Rong Jiu. "I'm not betting with you," he said. "I will
rescue him, Rong Jiu. But if that's how you wanna play, then I'll put my life
on the line."
Rong Jiu tipped his chin up, and something flickered in his gaze. His
palm shot out to press against Mo Ran's chest like a serpent strike, like the
sting of a scorpion. "Who is he to you? How long have you been lovers?
Longer than the two of us? Is he better than me in bed? Is it that he knows
more tricks, or that he cries out more prettily?" He paused, lashes lowering.
"Mo-gongzi, you're not the kind of lovestruck fool who would risk your life
for another. You hold no affection in your heart. You can't fool me."
He had barely finished when Mo Ran pinched his cheek painfully. Mo
Ran peeled Rong Jiu's hand away, his ink-black brows drawn low and fire
glinting in his eyes. "I didn't have a heart before. I do now."
Rong Jiu's eyes snapped up and locked onto Mo Ran's face. He
suddenly noticed that this person was scorching hot and even a little
unfamiliar. The young man before him still appeared to be that free and easy
Mo Weiyu, but there was something different about the soul inside.
Rong Jiu flinched like he had been burned by this kind of Mo Ran. He
wanted to turn and run, but Mo Ran's hand locked him firmly in place.
"And," Mo Ran went on, "between him and me… From here on out,
there will be no impropriety. I respect and love him without a single impure
thought. Don't you ever sully him again."
At this, he shoved Rong Jiu away. Rong Jiu knocked into a column,
staring incredulously at the person before him. He was too much in disbelief
to notice the strangeness of the phrase, "from here on out, there will be no
impropriety." Had he his wits about him, he would've certainly realized the
subtle implications behind those words.
No impropriety from here on out—that was to say, there had once
indeed been impropriety.
But Rong Jiu didn't catch that. "He isn't your…isn't your…"
"No," Mo Ran said. "He's my shizun."
Rong Jiu fell silent. He was the type who could always sniff out even
the most subtle of sentiments hidden within the words of others. Mo Ran
himself might not recognize those feelings, but Rong Jiu could smell them. He
was almost certain that Mo Ran loved the person in the portrait. As someone
who had never managed to obtain anyone's genuine affection, the thought
filled him with bitter jealousy. So, there was someone even the dissolute Mogongzi would willingly risk life and limb to save.
Rong Jiu suddenly wondered: If he had been more sincere toward Mogongzi back then—if he had been earnest and wholehearted—then might Mo
Ran have also…shown him some real feeling?
He was still caught up in wondering when Mo Ran spoke again in a
cold, vicious voice without the slightest hint of humor. "Rong Jiu. I will ask
you where he is one last time. If you still claim not to know…well, I'm a
cultivator, and I know of plenty of drugs and spells that will make a person
talk. And if that fails, do you think I won't take the plunge and go see the
ghost king myself?"
Rong Jiu was completely dumbfounded now. "You…"
"I've committed every kind of transgression in my life," he said softly,
"but now I want to live properly. However, if no one will lend me a hand,
then I'm still that same Mo Weiyu. Rong Jiu, think carefully before you
answer. I'm not afraid to die, nor am I afraid of having my soul scattered. If
you insist on standing in my way, I won't hold back either."
Neither spoke as they stared each other down: the resolute against the
resentful, the unshakable against the unresigned, the fiery against the frosty.
Then the ice in Rong Jiu's eyes melted, as if defeated by the wildfire in Mo
Ran's oppressive gaze. Rong Jiu's envy and hatred ran deep, but Mo Ran's
obsession was no shallow thing either. Head-to-head, he was no match for
Emperor Taxian-jun.
Rong Jiu's face was so ashen that even the vibrance of the rouge
flower couldn't disguise the gauntness of his cheeks, hollow as ruins and
wreckage. "Why would you go so far for him?"
"He treated me better than anyone, but I tormented him like he was my
worst enemy. I owe him."
A long moment passed. At last, Rong Jiu whispered, "I really haven't
seen him." Seeing Mo Ran's expression, he added, slowly, "I'm not lying.
But—I do know that all the newly captured ghosts are kept in the biggest hall
on the east side. They're locked in individual cells patrolled by the guards.
You should be able to find him there."
Mo Ran didn't wait even a second; he turned and rushed off into the
night. Rong Jiu stared after him distractedly, feet rooted in place. A strange,
bitter feeling flooded his chest, and despite himself, he yelled after Mo Ran's
retreating back, "Mo Weiyu, you—you want to lead a proper life now? Fat
chance! You and I are both covered in filth! Neither of us gets a do-over on a
proper life!
"Mo Weiyu! Just you wait—I'm going to live well; I'll do whatever I
have to do to cling to life. Even if I have to sell my flesh and my soul, I'm
going to live lavishly, even if my whole body rots away! Just you wait! You
think you can just wash away the stench of blood? As if! The filth's in your
bones! Go ahead and play at being reformed, and I'll keep whoring myself.
We'll see who gets to live a good life, Mo Weiyu!"
He shouted until even Mo Ran's silhouette had disappeared. Only then
did he drop into a crouch. His hands came up to cover his face as he choked
back his sobs. "How come you get to do things over? How come you get to
have someone who treats you well…even someone as rotten as you…how
come…"