We may have heard, read or watch somewhere that some bonds like families or parents are made by God itself but bonds like friendship are something which we choose but what if, it was all destined before only? What if it was send to you, to heal something which was not broken by them? Just imagine, gradually with time the walls you build up long before is now breaking down, even though you don't want it to happen but you can't stop it to happen.
.....
Some days passed, just a day before the of military training camp, I reach the university on the time to attend my first lecture. Upon reaching there inside the room, as usual after sharing smiles with Asher I sit beside her and soon she start talking...
Asher: So, all set for tomorrow?
Me: No, I will be doing packing after reaching home today. What about you?
Asher: Hmm half of my packing is done and rest of it I will do after reaching home today.
Me: Okay.
Asher: You know I am glad you and others are here with me because there was this time when I needed my friends the most but unfortunately, they were never there for me and sometimes they even judged me, when I was going through rough time.
Me: Ohhh it seems like you have many friends in past.
Asher: Umm yeah, it was a complete gang of eight people and we used to enjoy so much but now they are friends just for name sake.
Me: Ohh okay, umm is it easy to share out your feelings?
Asher: I think it may or may not be but it totally depends upon whether you are okay to do it or not.
Me: Ohh then why people think wrong of you or judge you when you don't do so?
Asher: This may be because, they must be having too much expectations from you and when these not get fulfilled, it hurts badly.
Me: Hmm yeah right. You know I have read somewhere that, sometimes god took some people away from us but he also add some people in our lives.
Asher: Ohhh okay.
After this, both of us become silent, perhaps we got lost in our own thoughts but the next moment only I realized how serious and sad things had become so, I thought to cheer up the mood by diverting the topic.
Me: (Try to sound as excited as possible) Well, lets leave this topic aside, tell me something is your family happy to live without you for a week?
Asher: (Chuckled out lightly) No no, in fact they are sad that I am going out for a week because they won't be having any kind of entertainment without me.
Me: (Surprised) Wow, that's really good.
At this moment rest three of our friends enter inside the room and lecturer too enter inside so, we stopped talking immediately and pay our attention to them. As usual Michiko go and sit on the back seat with her friends and here both Carissa & Savannah sit beside us, after taking attendance lecturer start teaching and my mind start his own conversation...
Mind: (Mockingly at me) Look at this bro, on one side is Asher's family who doesn't want her to go and on the other side is yours, who doesn't give a them about you.
Me: (Getting annoyed) Huhh no need to exaggerate, even you know how busy they are in their lives and because of that only they don't get time to spend with me.
Mind: (Unbelievable tone) Wow, amazing bro. Defending those people who never took a stand for you.
Me: (Getting offended) Hey, I am not defending anyone it just, I am stating the fact.
Mind: (Laughing sarcastically and applauding) Stating a fact... well, then stay with your damn fact.
Just like this me and mind goes away in different directions, but what he said keep roaming in my thoughts like two persons talking inside my head and I am feeling exhausted and sad about it. Soon first lecture finished, I lazily walk out of the room with my friends and in between that I keep yawning often.
After few minutes when we settled down inside the other room for our second lecture, Asher initiated the conversation with me...
Asher: (Speaking in low voice so, that only I could hear) Hey, you look quite tired and sleepy, hadn't you slept properly at night?
Me: (Half lying) Yeah, plus I found first lecture a little boring.
Asher: (Nodding in understand for a moment but next moment she sounded a little surprised) Ohhh okay. Well, you know I thought you enjoy psychopathology, I mean I always saw you paying attention on disorders.
Me: (Mentally scolding myself for saying the boring part) Ohh yeah yeah I really enjoy studying that topic but you know studying it just in the morning itself, can be really tiring and that too when you doesn't have a proper sleep in the night.
Asher: Yeah right, I got it.
At this moment the lecturer enter inside the room, soon start taking the attendance and we are listening carefully for our roll number call but we both get distracted hearing Carissa's voice...
Carissa: (With excited and curious tone) What you two were talking about Siya?
Me: (Almost scolding tone) Will you keep quite for sometime because my roll number is about to come?
Savannah: (Agreeing with me) Yeah right and just because your attendance is done, that doesn't mean that you will speak in between.
Hearing us, Carissa huffed and in the next moment I feel Asher poking her fingers in my waist so, I look at her with my eye brows raised but got confused because she is not looking at any of us, in fact she is looking where the lecturer is standing. At this moment I realized that the, lecturer is all silent and when I look up at her, I found her already looking at us with scowl on her face..
Me: (Whispering) O shit.
At the same moment Savannah too, say this and hearing this, Asher start coughing so, that she can control her laughter. I roll my eyes mentally at her for this behaviour and curse Carissa for her timing to talk to me at this time. Well, just after few minute the lecturer start speaking or should I say start scolding....
Lecturer: (Loudly, scolding us) What so interesting to talk about girls, that you are not even listening to the roll number calls.
Me: (Speaking in almost whisper tone, while looking at my lap) Umm nothing ma'am, I am sorry.
Lecturer: Well, don't you have manners Siya? You are getting scolded, right but look at you, still sitting. Huhhh now get up and speak up loud and clear.
Me: (Feeling embarrassed, but still I get up and look at her, then I speak up the way she wanted me to do so) I am sorry for the gossiping ma'am, this behaviour won't be repeated again.
Lecturer: I hoping for this but yeah if this will be repeated then you will out of this room, now sit down and be quite.
Me: Okay.
And I do what I was ask to do, I filled with anger with this scene. Thankfully, none of them speak up, I can feel Asher feeling sorry for me but I choose to ignore this, keep quite and let this lecture get over fast.
Well, sometime it does happened that, you wish for something and it got fulfilled immediately...
Mind: All of this happened because of Carissa, that bloody....
Me: Shhh, shut it. I can understand you feel bad but still control your language.
Mind: Bro, do you even know what exactly happened? No, right. Okay, let me enlighten you, the lecturer insulted us in front of the whole class and none of them took a stand for you but yeah if you have those old graduation friends, they would have took a stand for you.
Me: O please, if these people have taken up a stand for me then, they too have gotten scolded so, nothing wrong in protecting yourself first then others. And if we talk about my old friends, then no doubt they must have done this because we were immature at that time.
Mind: Huhh this is completely unbelievable bro, even you know what happened today is wrong because you are not at fault but still you are defending them.
Me: Huhhh, enough of this man. Why you keep saying that I am defending them? I know today what Carissa did today was not good and I am angry about it but, mistakes does happen so, one should not keep grudges.
Mind: Fine, there is no point talk to you because you won't understand.
Soon this lecture got over too, with other students only, we too also start moving outside of the room and while doing so, all three of them tried to talk to me but I intentionally avoid talking to them and move fast towards the other room to attend the next lecture. After reaching inside the room, I choose to sit on the last row seat only and once I settled down there, I look up only to found Asher sitting in the second row looking at me with sad expression on her face.
Just before the lecture could step inside the room, Michiko enter inside the room and with a smile on her face she comes where I am sitting at, then sit beside me. Soon lecturer too enter inside the room and after taking attendance she start teaching but rather than listening to her, Michiko started paper conversation...
Michiko: Hey, are you okay?
Me: Yeah I am all fine, even though I am feeling slight angry about what all happened before but its okay I guess.
well, I would have lied but since she said those three words so, I just surrender to truth because these three words are something which I always wanted to listen from others.
Michiko: Hmm, look I can understand whatever happened in the second lecture, that shouldn't have but sometimes things just happen and we can't do anything about it. Your conscience must be provoking you to thrash or insult Carissa but you do understand, right? that everyone can make mistakes, unintentionally.
Me: Yeah I can understand and may be that's the reason why I am being silent for time being.
Michiko: Okay, that's good.
Me: How are you, all set for a week trip?
Michiko: Yes bro, I am ready and even though if I don't want to then what other choice does I have?
Me: (Smiling because I remember this line, which I read once in a story) You know everyone have this second choice.
Michiko: (Hitting me slightly a notebook) You idiot, stop reading such books or stories.
And we started smiling widely, a series of thoughts pop up inside my head...
well, isn't' this amazing when you have someone who share common interest of hobbies and you can discuss it with them, whenever you feel like to do so.
i literally never wanted to have friends again in my life but look at it now, I have someone with me, who is making me smile in my angry state. Who said only family is god gifted, I can see this friendship is also just like this.
Just like this second lecture also got over, by this time I can feel my anger almost gone so, when our chance to come out I walk out then meet with Asher in the middle of the room and Michiko just behind me.
Asher: (Feeling guilty) I am sorry, I shouldn't have laugh at that time.
Me: (Feeling surprised) Hey, are you mad? Who say sorry on such small things? Its okay, I can understand it happens.
Asher: (Looking sad) But...
Me: (Jokingly) You know I would have laugh too in such situations. In fact, when someone is getting scolded, its really hard for me to control my laugh.
Hearing this, she chuckled out and this brought smile on our (Me & Michiko) faces, together we walk to the park because we have almost three hours free. While we are walking and settling down in the park, my mind started speaking again...
Mind: What kind of people they are and what kind of activities they do, the one who did nothing wrong is apologizing and the one who did all this ran away.
Me: This is only called Kaliyuga...
Mind: (Dramatically) O yeah, that's what was missing, your nonsense knowledge about spirituality.
Hearing this, I internally smirk at him and he rolled his eyes at me. The moment we settled down, we started to talk, well, as usual they both speak a lot and I just listened to them patiently. Fortunately, three hours passed just like this and only we three spend some quality time together, where we eat our lunch as well as planned about.. how we will spend our time there and what fun activities we will do there.
After this we attend back to back lectures, till four in the evening and during this whole time Carissa never come forward to apologise but Savannah come and ask for forgiveness, this change my perspective a little about her in positive. The moment last lecture got over, before leaving the room the lecturer told us that, we have to report at university, at six in the morning tomorrow and soon we too move out of university, bidding our good byes to each other.
I reach back home around five forty five, after getting fresh, I walk out of my room to prepare a hot cup of coffee for me. Upon reaching there, I found mother there starting her preparation to make the dinner, while taking sip of her tea from the cup. Seeing me there, she started talking...
Mother: How was your day, Siya?
Me: (Boiling the milk for the coffee) My day was good.
Mother: (Scolding me) Why are you drinking coffee, you should drink milk, no?
Me: (Rubbing the back of my neck) Umm actually, I am very tired but I have to do packing for the camp so, I will be needing energy for that and coffee will be the good choice.
Mother: (Rolling her eyes at me) Huhh okay, got it.
Once my coffee got ready, I walk out of the kitchen with the cup in my hand and then enter inside my room, later, while listening to soft music I enjoyed my coffee. The moment coffee got finished, I connected my phone to the room speaker, then I start doing my packing while listening to some energetic beats and in between I danced on these beats too.
It took me around forty minutes, to finish packing but still I keep dancing out a little on the beats but my trance broke hearing loud banging sound on my door and without pausing the music I opened the door, as soon as this happened Aunt barged inside the room. Well, I tried to stop it but who can do so when she is here, as usual without taking my permission she settled inside my room and I keep standing near the door.
Aunt: (Sternly) Will you stop the music for sometime, I want to talk.
I do, what she asked me to do so without saying anything, but not my mind...
Mind: And why should I do so? I don't want to do it because I don't want to talk to you.
Aunt: At what time you have to leave tomorrow for the camp?
Me: At four thirty in the morning.
Aunt: Ohhh okay and when will you be back? Have you completed your packing?
Me: After a week, I will be back and yes my packing is done.
Aunt: (Standing up) Okay, take care and have a safe journey, now I am leaving.
Me: Okay.
And she just walk out of the room, here I am like...
Mind: What the hell was that?
Me: I am confused bro, I though she will be complaining about something but she just asked me to take care and walk out.
Mind: Yeah, I thought same too.
With these thoughts in my mind, rest of my evening passed by then soon the dinner time come and here also father asked me same things but later told me to leave at five in the morning because, there will be literally not traffic so I will reach the university early. After dinner, I walk inside the room to give a final check of things i.e. whether I have packed every required things or not
Later in the night around twelve in the morning I fall asleep with a excitement and hope in my mind for a amazing week.