A cocoon of shadowy brambles opened on one side of Diagon Alley, from which Barnaby and Tonks emerged, looking around.
"You. Have. To. Teach. Me. That." The young witch poked Barnaby's arm with each word, loaded with envy and jealousy. "Do you know how uncomfortable it is to use Apparition at work?!"
She still remembered when Moody ordered her to train with that magic, constantly going back and forth between different points to get used to the dizziness and disorientation.
She couldn't look at food for two days!
"In order: I can try to teach you, but it's a bit different magic than you're used to, and you'll need a staff instead of a wand. As for Apparition, I said then that it's a half-baked job, and I stand by it," Barnaby replied calmly.
"Fine!" Tonks sighed and gave him puppy-dog eyes. "I suppose my manly boyfriend wouldn't mind carving me a staff with his big, strong hands?"
Barnaby looked at her, speechless, momentarily stunned by such an abrupt and flirtatious behavior that was…unusual for her.
Not that it made her look any less cute.
"Nice try, but no," Barnaby replied with an indifferent look.
"Aw, come on!" Tonks clicked her tongue and put on her usual energetic expression. "Why not?"
"For it to work, you have to get involved yourself and carve the staff with your own hands," Barnaby summarized, getting to the point. "With my help, you should be able to finish a decent one before the summer ends."
"That sounds pretty boring," Tonks made a face, not to mention that her vacation leave couldn't last that long.
"What if you consider it a couple's project?" Barnaby proposed.
Hmm, seen that way, Tonks found it much less boring and even interesting.
She and Barnaby alone in the forest at sunset, wood chips flying in the air, their eyes meeting, and…
"Tonks? Tonks! You're drooling."
Barnaby snapped Tonks out of her fantasies, er, deep thoughts, and she hurried to wipe the corner of her mouth with her robe sleeve.
"All right, I think I can try it!" she concluded suddenly, motivated for no apparent reason.
"Really?" Barnaby didn't understand the change in attitude, but he was secretly pleased that Tonks decided to go ahead. It meant spending more time together. "How's your Occlumency practice going?" he asked as they held hands and entered the main street.
"I think pretty well," Tonks rubbed the back of her neck, a bit embarrassed. "I usually practice more on weekends, since during the week I end up physically and mentally exhausted. Though I think my Patronus will soon be able to take form!"
"That's fantastic," Barnaby squeezed her hand a bit to show his support. "You know, it's a relief that you and Sanshi got along so well."
"I also thought I might have overstepped when I asked her to let me ride on her back, but it was an exhilarating experience!" Tonks said excitedly, recalling the wind against her face. "She's surprisingly agile. I doubt many wizards or witches could react if she decided to strike them by surprise."
They entered an ice cream parlor they knew, less crowded but still very popular, specializing in rainbow slushies. After a bite, they enjoyed the cold flavor along with a tongue that constantly changed color. They ordered three slushies, two for them and one that was discreetly taken by Sanshi when no one was looking.
"By the way, do you know who's going to be the new DADA professor at Hogwarts?" Tonks asked while taking a spoonful of the slushie that left her tongue yellow.
"Actually, I do," Barnaby nodded without showing much enthusiasm, his tongue turning blue. "Do you know a certain Lockhart?"
"You've got to be kidding," Tonks rubbed her ear, thinking she misheard the name. "That insufferable guy is coming to the castle as a professor?!"
"Wow," Barnaby raised an eyebrow. "Did you read some of his many books?"
"NO!" Tonks looked genuinely horrified, to the point where her hair momentarily turned white. "Do you have any idea what brainless zombies women who read his books turn into? I even confiscated some to see if they were cursed or something, I'm serious."
"It can't be that bad," Barnaby dismissed with a wave of his hand, but Tonks stared at him intently. "Right?" he added with a growing tone of doubt.
"You have no idea the nightmare you're in for this year at Hogwarts," Tonks said seriously, so serious that Barnaby started sweating despite still eating the slushie.
"How do you know about him, if not from the books?" Barnaby asked curiously.
He knew of the smiling man from some overly grandiose book signing event he had passed by on an errand in the past. He didn't seem to be a great professional in his field, much less someone to be hired as a professor at Hogwarts.
Not that he would ever offer himself for the job, knowing it was cursed and seeing the workload it entailed along with the meager salary.
"Moody," Tonks said the name through gritted teeth. "He made us review some old dismissed cases to familiarize ourselves with the details of the interrogations. Several of them mentioned a wizard or witch who was the victim of a powerful memory wipe, but one detail that caught our attention was that Gilderoy Lockhart's name appeared several times among those present at the scene."
"Isn't that too much of a coincidence?" Barnaby would definitely suspect something like that.
"Yes, we did too, so he led us to meet the man," Tonks seemed to be recalling a trauma by this point. "He's the most vain and incompetent man I've ever seen in my life. Forget about a powerful memory charm, that guy wouldn't even know how to levitate a feather if his life depended on it!"
"It can't be that bad, he graduated from Hogwarts if I'm not mistaken," Barnaby put on a thoughtful expression. "Wasn't he a Ravenclaw?"
"He must have fallen headfirst from the top of the nest," muttered Tonks. "That reminds me, be careful with your creatures around him."
"What do you mean?" Barnaby got serious and looked at her intently.
"That guy has the tendency to lie and exaggerate as easily as breathing," Tonks painted a not-so-pretty picture. "It wouldn't be surprising if he sees Sanshi and claims he fought a dozen of her kind in Tanzania while rescuing a group of Muggle tourists."
"That's impossible."
"But his crazy fans will believe it without question! And I don't think there'll be just one or two in the castle…"
Barnaby sighed a frosty breath of resignation. It seemed that after the commotion with Quirrell, they were going to have another eventful year because of his replacement.
"Hey!" Barnaby raised his hand to call the staff. "Three more rainbow slushies, please."