Another round of giggles and hushed whispers causes Shiv to become even more annoyed than he already was. The giggles started several minutes ago, and were originating from a bush just within the tree line. Or more accurately, from the kids hiding within the bushes.
He was working on his new farm. With his powers, he'd already managed to get a decent amount of land cleared out, and was now pulling the weeds and small plants out of the ground that were too small for him to accurately grab with his manipulation powers.
The only issue was that he wanted to be alone. The bugs and insane mixed up creatures that were constantly attacking him were bad enough. Now he had to deal with children? Things weren't looking bright.
He bent over to pull another weed out, but was surprised to find a snake-like bug launch itself toward him instead. He reacted immediately, throwing himself back and summoning a wall in between himself and his probably poisonous little assailant. He then set his hands on fire and jumped over the wall to punch the disgusting thing to death.
When he was finished, he took a deep breath and glared at the bush, where an endless stream of giggles was emanating. "One more squeak and I'll use all of you as fertilizer!"
His declaration only prompted more laughter, much to his annoyance.
"Alright, that's it. I'm taking you to your parents. Everybody out of the bush before I burn it to the ground." Shiv approached the bush with an annoyed expression, and set his hand on fire to accentuate his point.
Immediately, a group of kids tumbled out of the bushes, laughing and elbowing each other. Shiv came to a stop in front of them and crossed his arms. "Which one of you big-headed little midgets is in charge?"
Several of them raised their hands only to be out-shouted by a girl, who looked to be the oldest and tallest, and a boy, who was the shortest and looked ferocious. They stepped forward together and crossed their own arms as they peered up at Shiv.
"Where are your parents?" Shiv raised an eyebrow.
"They're dead. What's it matter to you?" The short boy answered with a clear attitude.
The oldest girl gasped. "No they're not! Don't go lying to strange men like that, Halestorm."
Shiv blinked and suppressed the pity that had immediately begun to build up. "Dude, that's a really cool name." He knelt down and looked Halestorm in the eyes, and nodded with respect.
"Why did you call him a dude? What is that?" Both Shiv and Halestorm ignored the girl, as Shiv was already tapped out on his patience when it came to answering that question, and Halestorm was too busy sizing Shiv up. He knew it was a compliment. He just wasn't sure how to take it.
"You're dumb." Halestorm pointed at Shiv's face and sneered.
"Halestorm, don't call names." Bossed the girl before she turned to Shiv and stuck her hand out. "My name is Betty. It's short for Beautiful, which means pretty. I'm sorry my little brother is such a jerk."
Shiv looked at her hand, looked at her face, then looked at her hand again. "Why are you holding a spider?"
She blinked and blushed as she dropped the spider she had been trying to conceal in the offered hand. "It's impolite not to tell someone your name when they've told you theirs." She sniffed.
"You're bossy." Shiv yawned. He didn't want his name getting out. He wasn't sure how infamous he'd become after his many adventures, and really, really did not want to be found. "I'll ask again: where are you hooligan's parents?"
"Hey! How'd you know our name, Dummy?" Halestorm asked suspiciously.
"I knew it because I'm only a dummy in disguise." He paused. "Wait, no. I'm a dummy disguised as a… dummy. Yeah, no. I guess you're right. I'm an idiot." Shiv sighed as a round of laughter made its way through his audience. "Last chance before I make you my gardeners who don't ever get to play: where. are. your. parents?"
"You're dumb." Halestorm replied.
"Yeah, yeah, I know."
"They're in the town. Like always. Dummy."
"You can lay off the 'dummy's, kid." Shiv glanced at the sun, gauging the time. "How far is the town from here?"
"Come on, we'll show you!" Betty said and began tugging on his hand. The group of kids, Halestorm excluded, immediately surrounded him and echoed Betty's statement.
Shiv sent one last, longing glance toward his farm before letting the children drag him into the woods.
On the trip there, the group of kids, who proudly called themselves the Hooligans, decided that Shiv's name was 'Dude', and went on to repeatedly call him 'Uncle Dude' every time they wanted his attention. Which to him, seemed like always.
"Uncle Dude, look at this! It's a leaf shaped like a heart!"
"Uncle Dude, why are you so dumb?"
"Uncle Dude, Uncle Dude, Uncle-"
"What!? What do you want, you annoying little-"
"Can you be my daddy? My old one ran away."
"Uh."
"No he didn't, you liar!"
Laughter ensued while Shiv groaned and wished he was anywhere else but here.
***
"I wonder what those kids are doing this time?" The beloved mayor of the town was sitting on the well in the center of the town, smoking his pipe and gazing up the hill at the tree line.
"It looks to me like they've got themselves a man." His friend, the blacksmith, said from where he was leaning on a post built to hold up the roof over the well.
"Oh, he's quite handsome, if a bit dirty. I wonder who he is?" The mayor's wife smiled viciously at her husband, who now had a sour expression.
"Can't you two keep yer fightin' behind closed doors? It's aggravatin' ta watch." A man, also leaning on a post, who had a marked resemblance to Halestorm scowled.
"Why are our children dragging a strange man into the town? What if he means to kill all of us?" The woman continued as if she hadn't heard.
"I think if he meant ta kill all of us, he woulda started with the kids out there."
"He wouldn't!"
"Clearly not, as the kids are right there." The mayor interjected tiredly.
"You're not one to talk, by the by." The mayor's wife turned away from her husband.
"'Bout what?"
"Fighting with your spouse. That's all you and-"
"Bah! Nobody asked ya yer opinion, so take it and shove it." The shaggy man made a rude gesture, then turned to yell at the children, who were excitedly approaching. "'Lo there, kids! What have ye caught this time?"
"A dude!" One particularly excited little girl who actually did have a father responded with a hop and a skip.
"Can we keep him? I promise we'll take care of him and feed him and everything." Betty said with big eyes and a practiced batting of the eyelashes.
"Hey! Don't go draggin' us inta this! I don't want no part in dealin' with this dummy." Halestorm voiced his opinion.
"Hmmm I don't see a problem with it." The man said after rubbing his hairy chin in thought.
"Maybe you should try opening your eyes, then." Shiv said blandly.
"Woah, it talks!" The hairy man turned an accusing look to Halestorm. "Ya said it was a dummy, so how's it talkin'?"
Halestorm frowned. "You said yerself that the biggest dummies are the ones who talk too much. Like Mrs.-" He began to motion toward the mayor's wife, only to be cut off.
"Ahhh! You've been paying attention, have ya? Good boy!" The mangy man smiled proudly then abruptly began yelling at the top of his lungs. "NO YOU CANNAH KEEP HIM! What do you think he is? A stray donk? He's a human bein' for Uriel's sake! So let him go!"
The kids reluctantly did so, and Shiv took advantage of it by turning himself very light and launching himself into the air, back toward the tree line. He landed on a treebranch and glanced over his shoulder at the quaint little village snugged into the clean valley surrounded by hills and giant trees, then retreated back toward his new home. He had a lot of work to do, and the sun was almost hidden by the horizon.
That meant that he had better hurry.
***
He woke up to the sound of liquid trickling, and a blast of cold air in his face. He sat up in a panic and saw with relief that his cleverly-placed pan was catching all of the piss his neighbors were sending his way.
Now feeling relieved, he smiled and lay back, putting his hands behind his head. His smile soon faded as memories of Blaze and his friends crowded his mind. Then memories of his family that, whether they had forgotten him or not, he'd never get to see again.
He rolled over and curled up, feeling very sad and small.
Then, with an annoyed grunt, he got up and got to the one thing he reckoned would always be there for him: farming.
***
And so time passed.