"I feel like I haven't seen you in ages, Mr. Halm." My dad said, unusually chipper. "It really has been years since we've sat down and talked like this."
Mr. Halm, or as I usually called him out of respect, Officer Halm, was the Sherrif of Dutchman, the man behind the button. I don't mean to be rude, and I couldn't; he's against some sneaky motherfuckers, but all the same, I can't help but put some blame on him for the shitty city we live in. Maybe if he issued some sort of "crackdown on crime" crime would magically disappear from Dutchman, but even I know it's a stupid pipedream.
"It really has..." Officer Halm nodded. "It really has been some time, eh Grinner?"
They gave one another a firm handshake, taking a swig of whiskey in unison with their free hand. That kind of brotherhood was something I rarely saw with dad, and perhaps, that respect had trickled down the family tree and into Baun. As Baun always boasted, he could get that silent statue to talk without either wanting something or trying to be profound.
'What am I even thinking?' I brought my hand to my head.
But seriously, what was I doing? I sat there, a mere audience to their conversation as Baun and Lorelai talked in the kitchen... She wouldn't tell Baun, would she? I'm overthinking. My mind couldn't settle no matter how hard I tried.
"Is everything alright, Amson?" That comforting voice came from my side.
"Y-Yes, ma'am." I told her, scootching closer to her.
Lorelai'd only inherited that comforting air, an aura that'd nearly send me into a joyful sleep. I could listen to that voice a million times. I leaned against Mom's side, and the tension from my weekend alleviated for an instant, nearly bringing me to tears. I sucked them up before they could surface, but I'm sure she felt that one tremble of my body.
"No..." She pushed me to where she could look me in the eyes. "Amson... Is there something wrong? Are you disappointed with how your birthday turned out? I'm sorry, but the Fletchlins are having... troubles right now."
For a moment, I thought I might tell her, but looking in those eyes, the eyes that put my mind and body at ease, I couldn't bring myself. She was considerate enough to lower her voice, getting all personal, but it wouldn't release from my mouth had I pried it out.
"No, no, no..." I hugged her again; I would never burden her heart. "Everything is perfect, just right."
I felt her hesitation hugging me back, her mom senses kicking in. All the same, she let it remain a mystery to herself, gifting me with that voice again.
"Just know you can tell me anything, always." She whispered.
"Yes ma'am." I responded, returning my attention to the brotherly conversation between dads.
///
I wandered around the perimeter of the house with Baun and Lorelai, hanging out like we were kids again. Grass crunched beneath our feet, and the forest around the house was silent for the most part. Lore and Baun seemed like quick friends, yet according to Lore, they'd already met before. I couldn't find the memory for the life of me, though. I don't think Baun nor Tora knew she existed before high school.
"What to do now..." Lore uttered, hands behind her head. "Mom and Dad say you can't open presents until nightfall, for god-knows what reason."
"Were you born late?" Baun nudged me on the shoulder.
"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked, confused.
"I mean, were you born late at night?" Baun clarified. "Sometimes, parents like to match different parts of a birthday according to that."
"Oh..." I thought for a moment. "I wouldn't know. Lore? I doubt you'd remember at such a young age, though--"
Lore quickly shut us up.
"Yeah, you were born late at night." She interrupted. "I remember most of that day. Dad drove us to the hospital in a hurry while we'd just about gone to sleep. I can remember the smile on his face; he was really excited, knowing it was a boy and all."
"Wow..." Baun muttered in awe. "So, you're one of those people who actually remember their early years?"
"Nah, just that part." Another shutdown by Lorelai.
Baun laughed a bit.
"Well, that's all interestin' and shit, but I gotta use the restroom." He pointed to the door. "I'll be back soon enough."
And, just like that, Lorelai and I were alone again. As Baun left us, we found a decent spot to sit in the backyard and looked through the glass, into the house. The inside of our house was bright compared to the, now, dimming sky above.
I took a sigh of relief.
"You're all stiff talking to him, huh?" Lore said, sitting with her legs crossed and her arm holding her head upright.
"I can't shake the feeling that I'm lying to him." I said, pressing my palms together.
"You won't be lying to him once you tell him the truth." She responded. "I'm sure he'd understand. He's known you long enough to know you wouldn't lie or joke about something like that."
My mind wouldn't allow me to listen.
"What am I supposed to say: 'Hey, Baun! I just, though non-consensually, fucked your girlfriend!'"
Lore shoved me, pushing me clean in the dirt. I rubbed my head as she grew angrier.
"Quit being facetious and listen to me for a second! The sooner you make things right to him is the sooner you make things right for yourself. It's not going to help you a damn if you keep bottling up shit..."
She looked me dead in the eyes, this time not even a hint of weakness like she had before.
"...You know where that nearly left you. Dead-- and what would Mom and Dad have the room to think; how would I even tell them?"
She mocked me, and as I heard it replayed through her voice, I realized how ignorant I sounded.
"'Ooh! Your son's dead and I allowed the shit to happen! Duh-Dur!' Hell no, and you know it. Don't even act like you're stupid, because you're not fooling anyone that knows a damn about you like family does."
She grabbed me on the arm, urging we with that pleading face.
"How long are you going to keep them out of the loop, keep them ignorant of who you really are, if you don't give them even an inch of it?"
I had nothing to say, only sit there and act like I was thinking. There was nothing I could say as a response to that, and looking into her eyes, there wasn't much I thought might satisfy her. I dropped it, and after a long silence, I whispered to her.
"Are you going to tell them?" I asked, sure she'd understand what I meant.
"I don't think it's my room to." She sighed. "From here on out, you're going to take responsibility for the shit you've done... As will I..."
Lore laid against the grass, stargazing. The sky was dark now, the light of the house and stars being the only illumination allowing us to see one another.
"They'll find out soon enough, but it's up to you whether you allow it to go smooth or boil over." She turned over to look at me. "Once they find out what you tried to do, whether its sooner or later, I doubt it'd be pretty."
The sliding door could be heard opening, and both of our heads rose to meet the source.
"Hey, guys!" Baun called from the door. "They say they're ready to open presents if you are, Am!"
Lore sat up, and Baun closed the sliding door, not allowing any bugs to get inside the house. Just as I was about to follow, Lore spoke, still sitting there. I looked behind myself to meet her eyes.
"I'll likely be out of your hair before you wake up tomorrow." She said, nearly laughing as she thought of her next sentence. "I won't expect you to feed my babies, but I want you to know that I love you and always will..."
I smiled, extending my hand to her. She grabbed it, and I pulled her up. She wiped the grass from her black jeans, fixed her hair, and followed me from the dark into the light.
She put a hand on my shoulder.
"Happy Birthday, Amson."