Your POV:
'I made my way down the familiar marble hallway, nodding at my coworkers I passed along the way. I finally reached Laurie's office, the huge dark wood door was such an intimidating site. I knock on the door and await his permission to enter.
"Come in," I hear from within the office. I enter the room to see Laurie with blood stains on his expensive shirt. I look down to see him standing over a pretty girl with short brown hair and blue eyes. It's Celeste.
"Ah my Peitho," said Laurie, beaming at me with his amber-coloured eyes and deceivingly handsome face. "I hope you have better information for me than your friend here." He says as he stares disgustingly at Celeste, "Get up, Clio. And wash yourself off, you won't be needing stitches for those."
Celeste whimpered in response and slowly stood up. I wanted to help her so badly, but I knew it would be worse for both of us if I did.
"Sit, my Peitho, how has my goddess of persuasion done today?" Laurie purrs at me, wiping his blood-covered hands on a handkerchief.
I smile seductively and give him my report, "You were correct, sir. Rodger has been embezzling money from the crown." Laurie smiles widely and lights a cigar, "Excellent, I'll get to work right away."
Laurie runs his fingers through his shoulder-length silvery blonde hair, "I knew I gave you the right name when I bought you."
He stands up from his chair and makes his way over to me. He bends down so he is level with my eyes, fingering a few strands of my (h/c) hair. He looks into my (e/c) eyes with his amber ones, "I can hardly wait to have you all to myself."
I'm very good at hiding my true feelings, it's best not to show any kind of weakness. I smile sweetly at him and kiss his cheek, even though I would love nothing more than to slit his throat with the knife I have strapped to my thigh all the time.
I bow to him as I turn to leave, but he stops me. "You've been requested by George for tomorrow," I pause, hand hovering over the door handle, "Make sure he talks, Peitho. You know you're my favorite, but you know what happens if you disappoint me."
I gulp silently before I turn around to face Laurie again, "Of course sir, thank you for the opportunity to be useful to you." He gives me another big smile and I finally turn to leave.
Once I open the door, I am yanked out forcefully. I'm chained to the wall in a dark stone room with only my underwear on. I try not to breathe too heavily, the pain in my ribs is making it very difficult. He's definitely broken a couple this time.
I see a door in front of me open, and I see Laurie come in. I glare at him hatefully, not even trying to hide my disdain and contempt for the man.
"Oh my sweet Peitho, it pains me to see you look at me like that." He kicks me hard on the side of my face, sending blood spitting out of my mouth. I gasp and cough as I try to catch my breath.
"You left me for that man, (y/n), and now you know there are grave consequences for disobeying me." I knew I was done for when he used my real name rather than the one he gave me.
He unlocks the shackles that hold me to the wall and lays me down on my stomach. I have no energy to try and resist him as he sits over me.
"Is it true that even after being married to him for a year, you still remain a virgin? This is good, that means you're still fit to be mine if you cooperate." He grabs my hair and forces my head up, "But that doesn't mean you're not going to be punished." He slams my face into the cold stone floor causing me to groan in pain.
"I have to give you something to make sure you never do anything like this again." I can hear the evil smile in his voice as he undoes my bra and brings his knife down on my back.'
...
I woke up breathing heavily and covered in sweat. "Are you okay?" I jumped when I noticed Sasha standing next to my bed. "What are you doing up?" I groan, it was still pitch black out.
"You were screaming in your sleep, it woke me up." She answered, staring at me with concern. I take a few more shaky breaths, trying to slow down my breathing a bit. "Sorry, go back to sleep, I'm okay," I say to her as I stand up from my bed. "Where are you going? We still have a couple of hours before we have to be up." She yawned sleepily.
"I don't think I'm going to sleep much more, plus you'll be able to sleep better without me here." I laughed nervously.
Sasha turns back to her bed and falls back asleep, snoring softly. I grabbed a towel and my uniform and made my way toward the showers.
This isn't good, I haven't had nightmares for some time... I guess it's to be expected when people keep asking me questions and bringing up the past.
I reach the showers and slowly remove my sweat-covered clothes. Before I step into the shower, I pause and look at my back in the mirror. I have many scars, but the ones on my back are definitely the worst. Especially a very angry jagged one between my scapulae and across the thoracic region of my spine.
Receiving that scar is probably the worst. But there are also scars I don't even remember how I got. Those events are still locked away in my deep subconscious, refusing to come forward... Maybe that is for the best.
After I showered and changed into my uniform, I decided to go up to the roof and watch the sunrise before breakfast.
As I stare at the early morning sky, my thoughts wander back to my dream. Celeste was probably the closest person to me when we lived at Laurie's. I wonder how she is doing without me around. That was the one person I really regretted leaving behind. She never really learned how to keep her emotions properly in check, and that made her a big target for Laurie's frustrations.
My mind then wanders to my family. I haven't seen my siblings since I married Malcolm, and it's been even longer since I've seen my mother. Not that it bothered me that much, I don't really want to see her. But I do miss my siblings... well two of them at least.
I want to see my brother and sister, but I don't want to put them in a position where they have to lie for me. Laurie is still pretty close with their father, and they are not very good liars.
Maybe I should try and see my mother soon. I don't know how much longer she has to live, and neither does Peter. Her illness is still a big mystery, but she is about the same age as her father when the illness claimed his life.
It is a hereditary disease, but none of my other siblings have shown any symptoms, as far as I know. It would be just my luck if I were the only one of my mother's children to inherit this disease. I chuckle darkly to myself, wouldn't that just be the way?
But that's another reason I wanted to fast-track into the scouts, I don't know if I will have my mother's illness. But I want to put in as much fight as I can either way.
"What are doing up here, brat?" I was so lost in thought that I didn't hear the door open and close, or Levi walking up behind me.
I was so surprised I nearly fell over, but Levi is quick and he caught me just in time. When I'm steady I push Levi away and clutch at my chest, hoping that would help slow my heart rate down.
"You are so jumpy," Levi smirked as I glare at him. "I'm not jumpy," I declare defiantly, "I've never been snuck up on so many times before I came to the scouts."
"It's not our fault, you're the one who is always spacing out," Levi scolds me as he crosses his arms, "What were you so deep in thought about anyway?"
"I don't know, unicorns, rainbows, or whatever girls think about nowadays. What are you doing up here?" I retort.
"I come up here every so often when I can't sleep." He shrugged and grabbed my arm. "It's almost time for breakfast anyway, let's go."
I sigh and let Levi lead me off the roof and toward the Mess Hall. I wondered why he was even hanging on to me; he generally hated physical contact. I feel my face heat up a little bit, so I try to think of something else to get my mind off it.
We reach the Mess Hall and Levi drags me over to grab my tray of food. I go to reach for mine, but Levi swiped it before I can and walks away to an empty table with it, setting it down next to his.
I rolled my eyes and take a seat next to him. "Up late babysitting?" Levi asked after I settled in next to him. "Uh, yeah, kids are a handful," I answer.
"I hear it was my ex that kept you up late." A familiar voice on the other side of me says. I turn to see Peter's handsome smile as he sits down on my other side.
"It's been a while since we talked, so I didn't mind much." I smile at him, "Paul stopped by too, wondering where Ellen was, so I left when they agreed to stay until you got home. But I want to hear about your date!"
"Yes! Dr. Hottie, how did your date go?" Hange appeared across the table from me with Erwin and Mike not far behind.
"It went very well," Peter replies, "It was a nice evening." I punched him playfully on the arm, "Did you not bring her home? That's why I ultimately left a little early, so she didn't feel uncomfortable."
"I want to do this the right way, so we parted ways without even a good night kiss." Replied Peter.
"You should have just taken her to pound town, who cares about the formalities?" I continued to tease him.
"That's interesting coming from you, virgin." He smiles mischievously. My face immediately went completely red.
"Virgin...?" Hange said quietly, "Weren't you married for a year?"
"... Yes," I replied.
"... And you were living with Dr. Hottie for three years..."
"... Yes."
"How the hell does that even happen?" Hange along with everyone else seemed to be surprised.
I didn't think it was possible, but I could feel myself becoming even redder. "Aw!" Hange cooed at me, "You're so cute! My little virgin!" Hange skips around to my side of the table and hugs me from behind.
Levi stepped in and unwrapped her arms from around me, "Leave her alone, shitty glasses."
Hange reluctantly went back to her seat across from me, and I relaxed a little. I notice Peter grow silent and just stared down at his coffee. "What's on your mind?" I ask him, confused by his sudden change of attitude.
"What was he like?" He asked me quietly. I stiffened a bit in my seat, knowing where this is going. "What was who like?" I inquire back at him, even though I knew who he was referring to.
"Malcolm."
"... You've never asked me about him before," I note quietly.
"I've always wanted to, but when we were living together, I didn't want to make you feel uncomfortable and bring up anything that may make you upset." He said gently.
I didn't know how to answer or where to start. It's not that talking about him makes me sad, there was just a lot to our relationship.
"Fine, how did people describe him?" Peter rephrased his question. I consider the question for a moment and I can't help but chuckle a bit, "Frustratingly ordinary, is the term I heard a lot."
I was greeted with silence around me, so I decided I should probably clarify, "People just had their own opinions on what they thought someone who is married to me would look like. But when they actually saw the two of us together, I guess they just didn't understand why I chose to be with him instead of someone more attractive. That's the general opinion in the capital, there are a lot of shallow people."
"I mean, you can't really blame them for thinking that," Peter comments, "Look at you, I'm sure they imagined you would end up with one of your coworkers."
"If I cared about looks, I would date eyebrows or short stack," I said gesturing to the two men. Hange snorts out a laugh when both Levi and Erwin blush. "We are still your superiors you know, you should address us as such," Levi growled at me.
"A thousand pardons sirs, I meant Commander Eyebrows and Captain Short Stack." I smile at them innocently.
"Enough, we are getting sidetracked," Peter interrupted, "Tell me more about him."
"I met him when I was 5. My brother, Benjamin, was his closest friend. And when my brother snuck out of his father's place and came to visit my mother and I, Mac would go with him. I had a little crush on him right away." I smiled sadly, thinking about the times Mac would come down and visit me, even without Ben sometimes. He treated me like a little sister; I thought he would never look at me as a woman. I remember his short brown hair and his kind brown eyes. Especially that lopsided grin he gave me all the time. He may not have stood out in a crowd, but he always caught my attention when he entered the room.
"For a while I thought he only married me to get me away from Laurie," I continued, looking down at my trey, "And I think it started out that way for him, but after a few months of being married, he started looking at me as a wife."
I look up from my trey to Peter, "I was the one who wanted to take things very slowly... and then he died..." I trail off into silence.
"I do have another question for you, and then I will drop it." Peter coaxed, "You know, in the beginning, I did hope we could actually become something..."
"I know," I say gently as I wait for him to continue. "Do you think there was ever a time where it could have worked out between us?" Peter finally asked, looking into my (e/c) eyes for an answer.
I give him a small sad smile, "No," I replied honestly. I notice his shoulders sag a bit, so I put my hand on his, "But not for the reasons you think."
Peter nodded, kissed my hand then got up from the table. I assume to go to his office. I didn't want to upset him, but we have always been very honest with each other, and I didn't see a point in sugarcoating my response.
"Aw! A little harsh, (y/n) don't you think?" Hange complained, "But in your defense, I suppose he should have guessed you couldn't get over the death of your husband."
I shook my head, "You misunderstand me, Hange," I give her a small grin, "It wouldn't have worked out between us because of Grace."
Hange gives me a confused look. "Grace is someone Peter has known since they were very young." I explained to Hange, "They never actually started a relationship because the timing was never right. Then Grace moved away and married a man her parents set her up with. And Peter married Ellen because they hooked up once and she became pregnant."
"The reason he and Ellen ultimately divorced is that she never really felt like he could love her as much as he clearly still loved Grace. Ellen grew tired of putting more effort into the relationship than Peter, so they settled things amicably and separated." I noticed that Hange still looked a little confused.
"Grace left her husband and found Peter again when I first went to live with him. I could tell they still had strong feelings for each other when I saw them together. But Peter rejected her because he didn't want me to have to go back to Laurie." I look down at my hands, ashamed that I was the reason he held back from Grace.
"But he went out with her last night, so since I'm not around he can finally be with her. I had to make sure I didn't develop feelings for Peter because I knew he will always still have Grace in the back of his mind." I look up expecting to see Hange across from me, but she moved around the table again to give me another bone-crushing hug.
"Aw! My sweet little (y/n)! Don't worry, you will find love again!" She squealed as she held me close.
"Get off me!" I gasp as she squeezes the air out of my lungs. Levi unwrapped me from Hange's grasp again and shooed her back to her side of the table.
"Alright, I'm going to go," I say as I stand up from the table, "I can only take you in small doses, Hange." And with that I make my way out of the Mess Hall, not noticing right away Erwin, Levi, and Mike's eyes watching me as I leave.