You're happy when the other man tells you to lie back because you no longer have to suck his cock. Then he enters you. You prefer a lot of foreplay, but that didn't happen.
This other man puts his cock in you and he seems to think he has to slam it as deep in you as he can. And it's not entirely pleasurable for you, but your husband seems to like seeing it happen because he's masturbating and smiling and cheering the other man on. Then, this other man cums inside of you. Yet, that wasn't bad enough. When the other man pulls his cock out of you, your husband gets between your legs and starts slurping out the other man's cum.
You and your husband hadn't talked about him licking up and eating another man's cum from your pussy. Now you're questioning your husband's sexuality and your whole marriage. You know that your husband could tell that you didn't really want to suck this other man's cock, and you weren't enjoying the sex you were having with this other man, but your husband either didn't notice or didn't care what you were feeling or experiencing. The only thing that seemed to matter was that your husband was turned on.
Now, you're questioning your husband's sexuality. Your husband has allowed another man to invade the most sacred part of your body. You felt forced to have sex with this other man, and now you resent your husband. This is not cuckolding. You may have consented, but you weren't all in.
Your husband liked what happened a lot more than you did. This was not a shared experience because your husband got a lot more out of it than you did. And the resentment you feel has a lot more to do with your husband than it does with the man who just fucked you.
The other man leaves, and you are left with your husband, the man who didn't stop what was happening when he saw that you didn't like what was happening, the man who was so excited to get between your legs and lick another man's cum out of you. You don't know if your husband has always been secretly gay, but you do know that he didn't protect you. You're not sure how you feel about your husband. He allowed another man to treat you like some kind of street slut. Now you're not sure if you can trust your husband. And without trust, what do you have?
Let's turn the tables.
Your wife agrees to have sex with another man. She's as excited as you are at the thought of having sex with another man. When the other man arrives, he's as good-looking as he was in his picture. You and your wife talked with this other man on the phone several times. You and your wife have agreed on a safe word, in case she or you want things to stop. The other man is a gentleman. He's nicely dressed and freshly showered. Your wife kisses this other man and things seem to be going well.
The other man undresses your wife and she helps him undress. They kiss some more. Things are still going well. Your wife seems happy, the other guy seems to be happy, and you're enjoying what you're seeing. You realize that the other guy's cock is a lot bigger than you thought it was, and your wife seems to be overjoyed that this other man has what he has. Your wife spends a considerable amount of time sucking this other man's cock, a lot more time than she usually does when she sucks your cock. You deal with it because he's new and she seems to like what she can do for him.
You're impressed that this other guy can stay hard for so long. And this other man and your wife get into positions that you and your wife never have. And she sucks him again and again. Things are still going well. You're a bit envious of this other guy, but you attribute everything to him being new and the experience being new for you and your wife. The kissing didn't bother you. Her sucking him didn't bother you that much, but when he pulled out, got on his knees, and came in your wife's mouth, and she swallowed his cum, that was when a line was crossed.
Your wife never let you cum in her mouth. And now she's let another man cum in her mouth, and she swallowed! What the hell? This wasn't something you and your wife talked about or predicted. And now that it's happened, you're pissed. Why would she let another man cum in her mouth, and swallow, when she would never do that for you? Now you're wondering what else she's done that you don't know about.
You feel betrayed. What happened can't be undone. And it happened so fast that you didn't have time to do anything about it. When the other man leaves, you are left with a woman that you love that has betrayed you. Now you see her as a slut. And you don't want anything more to do with her.
The above examples are not of cuckolding gone wrong. They are examples of couples who didn't fully communicate, who let their feelings get the best of them, and in each situation, some things happened that weren't discussed before the other man had sex with the wife. What happened with each of these couples was not a bad sexual experience. It was a bad marital experience.
The situations above are a perfect example of why, long before another man is invited to have sex with the wife, that the couple must think of all the variables. They must discuss the times when things might happen that they didn't predict or expect to happen.
In the first situation, the wife didn't verbally communicate her discomfort to her husband. And the husband wasn't aware of and didn't notice, that his wife wasn't having a good time. In this situation, both the husband and the wife failed each other and themselves. There was a total lack of communication which led to negative feelings and questions that should have been answered long before another man was involved.
In the second situation, the husband was okay with everything until the other man came into his wife's mouth, and she swallowed. Maybe it was the other man cumming in his wife's mouth that upset him, but, then, maybe it pissed the husband off because his wife swallowed the other man's cum, when she had never swallowed his. This was a one-time experience, one that could have been talked out, but the husband let his emotions take over and the marriage would be stressed going forward.
Again, there was a lack of communication. None of the negative experiences had to do with the cuckolding, it had to do with a lack of communication. In both cases, emotions took over.
Anytime another man, or other men, are invited into the marital bed, emotions will arise. There's no way of getting around that. And that is a downside of cuckolding. It forces us to experience emotions we may not be prepared to handle.
Another downside of cuckolding is that it forces us to communicate. And if you are not good at communicating, then cuckolding will not only not work, it's going to be a struggle while you try to make it work.
Another big downside of cuckolding is the "other men". The other men are going to be as unique as you and your spouse are. And they are going to have unique personalities. Some of the other men are going to be open to the couple's wants and suggestions, and others will want to control everything. When you involve a third, or fourth or fifth, person in your marital bed, you're going to have different personalities, expectations, wants, needs, and desires. And you have to expect this.
Some other men may say, "I completely respect the marriage of the couple I am with. But, that does not make me the slave of the husband. If the husband wants a guy that he can boss around and tell how to fuck his wife, and that is what the wife wants too, I'm out of there. They want a different guy, which is fine.
When we talk ahead of time, I am clear that I am there, first and foremost, for the pleasure of the wife. This is my avocation, giving women pleasure, and I have done this for wives for years. I am there to give them both something that they should want, her wild sexual satisfaction.
Most times, for her to get that, she has to not worry about the husband, his feelings of being left out, his physical pleasure, while we are having sex... at least at first, while we bond physically. He can watch, be naked, jerk, get close, and look, but only after we are all comfortable and the wife has really swung into her full orgasms do we open things up for the hub to be more active.
Some women need for the husband to start outside the room for a while before we let him in. Years of experience with dozens of couples have proved that this is the best way for me to work. Other men who do what I do may be different.
I am completely respectful of the husband. I don't need to make him feel humiliated (although those feelings are part of the experience for some men). When we are all easy, I am happy for the hub to suck me clean, lick the wife, serve us to make things even hotter. The wife often likes to see her husband suck me, as well. As long as she is getting the pleasure that she needs from me, and then if he is happy too, I'm doing my job. And it is some of the best sex that I ever have."
The above statement is not an uncommon one. Many "other men" feel that they should be in control and the husband should be relegated to being just a bystander. This type of situation puts the wife and the husband in a bad place. The wife must defend the husband, or the husband must defend himself. And in this situation, both the husband and the wife want the sexual experience to be good, but now they have to decide how they should act and if they are willing to allow another person, who is just there to fuck the wife and leave, to control them and their playtime with each other.
Being the third for a couple can be tough for the "other men," too. Most of them know that they are nothing more than a living-breathing dildo. Other "other men" feel that because they have a big cock and can fuck for a long time and can cum multiple times that it makes them more valuable to the wife than her husband is to her. Either way, this can become problematic.
Both the husband and the wife may want the wife to have sex with a man who has a bigger cock, a lot of stamina, and can cum multiple times, but they are not looking for a man to replace the husband, sexually or otherwise. They are simply looking for a man who has a bigger cock, who can fuck for a long time and can cum multiple times-and then leave.
The problem for a lot of couples is that they want a man that has a bigger cock, has a lot of sexual experience and can perform on-demand. Where this is a problem is in that a lot of cuckold couples are looking for the same thing. And if a man has a big cock, is very sexually active with a lot of women or couples, and can perform on-demand, he is a wanted man. Many couples look for such a man, but many wives fear that if this "other man" has sex so often, he may not be clean. They have no idea who this "other man" has been with and if he even cared.
Another problem is that if a couple prefers the wife to be with different men each time, they more often just have to trust that the "other man" is clean and DD-free. Some couples will take the time to make sure they and the "other man" are tested, but this is not always the case.
Then you have the possibility that the wife may develop romantic feelings for a man that she has had sex with on multiple occasions. Or, possibly, that the husband may develop feelings for this "other man." What then?
I, as many writers do, may point out the benefits of cuckolding more often than the downsides, but the reason for this is because most of the downsides connected with cuckolding have nothing to do with cuckolding. It has more to do with the couple themselves, their trust level and ability to communicate, and their ability to compromise.