Welcome to the Parahumans Online message boards.
You are currently logged in, Guitar_Boy69
You are viewing:
• Threads you have replied to
• AND Threads that have new replies
• OR private message conversations with new replies
• Thread OP is displayed.
• Ten posts per page
• Last ten messages in private message history.
• Threads and private messages are ordered chronologically.
■
♦ Topic: Über and Leet fail AGAIN!
In: Boards ► News ► Brockton Bay
Ronald_Jizzemm (Original Poster) (Veteran Poster) (Chief of Notcon clan)
Posted on February 9th, 2010:
Yo peeps, was watching Über and Leet's GTA commemoration stream and while they were beating some hooker they got BTFO'd by some kid!
[Hammertime.video]
This is some seriously funny shit! Best content those chucklefu**s have released in years!
(Showing page 1 of 142)
► Carlionus_Franks2 (Brockton Bay Resident)
Replied on February 9th, 2010:
Holy sh**! HAHAHA! That kid just throw a freaking hammer at a cape carrying a flamethrower! The fu***** balls on that kid!
[LeetHammerFace.png]
► L447GG5
Replied on February 9th, 2010:
@Carlionus_Franks2 There's NOTHING funny about this! The only reason the kid got away with it is because Über and Leet don't hurt kids! This is a low blow, and I bet someone put the little sh** up to it! This smells like a conspiracy to me! Why is some kid running around with a hammer anyway!?
► I_Love_Capers_The_Nut
Replied on February 9th, 2010:
@L447GG5 oh I don't know, maybe because there's assholes like Über and Leet running around. Are you really gonna defend those dynamic douchebags assaulting an innocent woman? Unfortunate career choice or not, everyone's entitled to safety!
I guess I shouldn't have expected decency from one of their fanboys. Seriously though, this is a new low for them.
► Clerycul_Error
Replied on February 9th, 2010:
Does anyone actually know what happened here? Outside of another failure from those two. Their theme was GTA but I can't imagine they only stole a car and beat a prostitute?
► PC_EMC_OJJJ420 (Brockton Bay Resident)
Replied on February 9th, 2010:
@Clerycul_Error I live around that area and the ABB is going nuts. Heard some of them talking about one of their hideouts getting smashed. They must've stolen something and went from there... Dunno what they would have done if Lung or Oni Lee turned up, my guess is roll over and die? I would've watched the stream if that'd happened.
It's funny how a kid did more work than the PRT ever has in this area...
► Cowboy_Beatup9 (Brockton Bay Resident)
Replied on February 9th, 2010:
How sure are we that the boy isn't a cape? That throw was impressive, something a regular guy wouldn't manage 9 times outta 10. Maybe a trajectory-based ability?
► EiNoble_Light (Moderator) (Veteran Poster)
Replied on February 9th, 2010:
@Cowboy_Beatup9 Do not speculate on the identity of capes or you will face a ban.
► Genna_Bakker25 (Verified PRT Agent)
Replied on February 9th, 2010:
We at the PRT are looking closely into this incident, if anyone knows the identity of the young man and woman who were involved please refer any information to me or the local PRT office.
We recommend citizens do not take matters into their own hands, what occurred here, while heroic, put many people at risk. Consider what might have happened had one of the villains in question retaliated. Our experts have identified one of their weapons as a flame thrower, something which would have caused major damage to the neighbourhood, and could have very well been lethal.
Again, we do not denounce the young man's actions, but he must be aware of what could have happened. Vigilantism serves no one and only causes more harm on the public. Matters such as this should be resolved by experts and law enforcement. Thank you.
► PC_EMC_OJJJ420 (Brockton Bay Resident)
Replied on February 9th, 2010:
@Genna_Bakker25 "We're not denouncing his actions but tell us where he is so we can punish him.", yeah okay miss. Hey, why don't you tell us if you caught the two 'actual' criminals? The kid already did half your job, and since you guys are all 'serious' professionals you should have had no problem... Right!?
SMH
[LeetHammerFace.png]
► GooseGooseGooseDuck (Veteran Poster)
Replied on February 9th, 2010:
@EiNoble_Light confirmed!?
PRT's either gonna tear the kid a new hole for making them look incompetent or give him a medal. Either way, he's lucky he didn't punk some capes who actually have backing. If he'd done it to an E88 cape he'd probably be in the bay mafia style.
Also [LeetHammerFace.png]
► Ejacul_On_99
Replied on February 9th, 2010:
I'll do you one better.
[LeetHammerFace.gif]
(Showing page 15 of 142)
► Point_Me_@_The_Sky (Verified Cape) (New Wave) (Brockton Bay Resident)
Replied on February 9th, 2010:
I know him! He plays guitar downtown sometimes, never knew he was so kick ass! You do you Guitar Boy! I didn't know I could like you more than I did! I wanna adopt him!
[LeetHammerFace.gif] [LeetHammerFace.gif] [LeetHammerFace.gif]
► Cape_Fan_No_Cap11 (Temp Banned)
Replied on February 9th, 2010:
@Point_Me_@_The_Sky dont go for that kid! go for someone ur own age... like me!
Please...?
► Yufodeitus3 (Temp Banned)
Replied on February 9th, 2010:
@Cape_Fan_No_Cap11 JFC these stalker fans...
...
@Point_Me_@_The_Sky by the way, how much would it cost for feet pics? Asking for a friend...
► Control_Freak5556
Replied on February 9th, 2010:
You guys sure u wanna go with that? Her moms a lawyer u know... And a cape...
-----------------------------
"Oh..." I mutter and look up from my newly installed computer, boxes of camera, audio, and music equipment scattered around me. I only just logged into PHO to check if everything was working properly and to find Canary's email or PHO account. Seeing myself trending on the front page had been the last thing I wanted to see.
Honestly? I don't know what I expected when I jumped in to stop those comically stupid capes from beating that girl... Takeshita could have informed me that those bastards streamed all of their crimes live for their degenerate subscribers to watch and jerk off to.
Now I've got the PRT on my ass, and I was counting on them turning up since I was in the government database. Plus whoever else wants a beef with me now that I'm 'known'.
Fuck. Why didn't I just leave those two cunts to their jollies? They probably wouldn't have killed that hooker, so in the end all I'd done is paint a target on my back.
I broke rules one and two, 'Don't be a fucking hero', and 'Look out for number one'. I can't be acting like breaking up a fight is the same as my old life, capes exist here for god's sake, and if tropes taught me anything it's that being a good person is a great way to get fucked over.
I sigh and squeeze the bridge of my nose, if things got any more stressful I'd need to worry about grey hairs, even as a thirteen-year-old.
"Alright, this is fine, fucked as it is my plans remain the same." I set up my new camera on a tripod, grab my guitar and sit on my bed to begin playing.
I'd thought about what song I wanted to sing and strangely I could recall most I'd with relative ease... I could pick up individual instruments with pretty good accuracy, meaning I could fully recreate these songs if I had the tools to do so.
Maybe my power had more utility than just 'not needing to eat, breath, or sleep'?
Or maybe I was just being hopeful.
Regardless, I soon find a song I think would perk Canary's interest. It needed to be something she herself could sing, but couldn't outright repackage and release as her own. Take Me to Church was my pick, while I didn't have the guttural suaveness of Hozier, I could sing it relatively well. My balls hadn't dropped properly yet, but I had enough 'boyishness' in there to match it somewhat.
I cough into my fist, start the recording, strum my acoustic guitar, and begin. "My lover's got humor-"
Going through it brings up a memory of when I'd first heard it. It hadn't been over the radio, at a bar or club, no... I'd actually heard it from a busker in a subway tunnel while taking my niece...?
My playing pauses, I had a niece? No... The kid's face is fuzzy in my mind, no name... I recall her smiling up at me with a couple baby teeth missing.
I growl and start again, whoever they were, they're gone now. Whatever being stripped me of my memory should've finished the fucking job instead of leaving these ghosts in my head!
"-Good God, let me give you my life..." I sigh, allowing my strumming to come to an end. I finish the recording and almost jump out of my skin when I hear someone clap from the doorway.
"That was beautiful, Kieu." Tiêuve says, drying he watery eyes with some tissue she'd tucked in her sleeve.
"Thanks..."
"You wrote this?"
I nod, I'd done enough research to make sure I wasn't stealing from an actual person. One mistake could through my entire discography into question after all.
"Then... Why are you singing about women...?" she asks, almost accusingly.
I blink, "Uh, -it's just easier to sing about romance, y'know? What else am I going to sing about?" I say, inwardly agreeing with the rushed sentiment.
"Mhm...?" she walks over and sits on a chair near my new computer, crossing her legs, "Why don't you sing about something your age?"
"Like that? Legos?" I snort before pausing in thought, a grin splitting my lips, "Alright, fine, you want something 'nice'?"
I tap my guitar and begin strumming, "Let me tell you what I'm about to do. Hey Mama, I know I act a fool but, I'm going back to school. I appreciate what you allowed for me,
I just want you to be proud of me-..." I trail off as I see Tieu sniffling into her roll of tissues.
"Tieu, you alright? I can stop if you want..." I awkwardly ask, not expecting her to start crying.
She sniffs, "Ah-, no... P-please, continue."
I shrug, "Okay... If you want." I clear my throat, "Mama said, 'Life is like a box of chocolates'_"
She sits there silently as I go through the rest of the song, changing out some lyrics to be less 'rap-like' or that reference artists or things which didn't currently exist. Once done I set the guitar to the side and eye her questioningly. "Can you tell me what's bothering you now? I know for a fact my singing isn't good enough to bring women to weep." I was no Canary.
Tieu sniffs into her tissue once more, "No, I shouldn't bother you with it. It's long in the past now. You just reminded me of something."
"Uh-huh? Pretty sure as your 'son' I'm required to give you a shoulder to cry on. You don't have many other people to confide in around here either." I say, beginning to feel sorry for her. Before I'd come along she'd only really be close with Mr Hotaro, with passing friendships in the neighborhood. No one she could really let everything out to.
I was surprised enough that she let her 'strict facade' drop. Until now she'd been pulling off a perfect caring but emotionally detached Asian parent.
She shakes her head and stands, "No-no, I'm fine... Go ahead with your," she gestures vaguely at my recording set up, "Thing."
I peek around the corner as she steps out and places some lit incense around the photographs of her family... Everyone's got baggage, those affected by the Endbringers more than others.
Why was I feeling like such an asshole? It couldn't be because I was manipulating an emotionally vulnerable woman into taking me in-... No, that was probably it, but I hadn't felt like this before now.
I run a hand through my hair, "Fuck. I'll make it up to her, being an asshole is optional, but not for someone like her."
Shaking my head, I send the recording to Canary's PHO account 'Canary_Cryxx' and promise myself to do something nice for Tieu. Nice enough to make up for lying to her face all this time, at the very least.