We have waited for what felt like an eternity. I have also started practicing meditation along with her. Even though it's just the two of us here I don't hate it but rather find it pleasant. I am sure that if I tell her this she would surely question my sanity. If there was a clock here I am sure that almost 22 hours were spent on meditating and the rest two would be talking to each other as not to lose sight of ourselves and to continue speaking with each other. In there two hours we would continue to move along the place then settle in a place and then continue moving and slowly but steadily explore this 'Palace of Infinity' as I call it and 'The Door of the Infinite' as she called it. Lily to me have always felt like a distant figure. Even when I tried to close the gap, she would always draw an invisible line, which she made clear that I shouldn't cross. But not always could she do it. Sometimes she unconsciously spoke about her family.
While meditating she mostly spoke and cried while mumbling about her mother. Then only did I find a great fact that one's soul who was in a near death state in which the body didn't die couldn't cross over to the land of the dead but also could express complex actions like that of crying in a soul form.
One day in the 'Palace of Infinity' as we were talking something like the talking of people were heard. Lily's clouded dark days have finally begun to see light. At first she was so excited and happy that her throat had become heavy to speak and silent tears were falling in a single file but even then she was smiling. That was the first time in my entire life that I saw her smile that way without putting on a pathetic mask trying to cover her real scarred self. Deep inside me I felt as this blessing was a curse in disguise. But who to tell? if I ever did that not only would I get the contempt of Lily but she would try to stay away from me and treat me as a traitor.
Then moving forward the noises started becoming louder and louder until the point of hearing their conversations clearly and discern their gender. Slowly but surely I could see the changes in Lily which started to worry me. Many worries started to take place in my mind. A truly chaotic place had my mind become and meditating became harder to do but still I was able to keep everything at bay for a short period of time and was able to continue my training using meditation. Lily was also becoming more into a daze about thinking of all the things she had to do once we left this place.
Nothing is free in this world. There is no unfound kindness. Every action had it's own consequences. Who would help a sinner even at the cause of facing repercussions from the public? Why was she labelled as a sinner in the first place? There is no known method for saving a dead person. Why? Why? Why? ..... Why? Anxiety was slowly eating me from inside. Was it a last sympathy to Lily from me for writing this incomplete story or due to everything we've been through? I couldn't decide. I had to stop this or I would surely go insane. But like a slave to his addiction I was going crazy from thinking about her.
There was little to no progress at first but I could feel my condition improving. Meditating while thinking of nothing started to give me newfound peace and if as I had achieved enlightenment. I started looking at things in a different prospective and was able to stabilize my breathing and was able to calm myself down even while thinking of this matter.
Emily, Emily, Emily! Am excited voice of Lily was heard. I could feel my eardrums exploding. If felt as she just ran a marathon, panting and grasping for words or as if she had seen a ghost. But she was not terrified. It felt as if she saw a grandma as a ghost and got all excited or when they said that due to you being a naughty child this whole year you wouldn't get a gift from Santa and you unexpectedly find a gift under the Christmas tree on Christmas Eve if felt kinda that way. The news Lily told me gave me the shock of a lifetime. I....I found a portal like thing formed from light. We might have just found out ticket out. Her joy could not be contained. But instead of me becoming overjoyed I just got some serious chills behind my back. This was seriously giving me some pretty bad vibes. Something about the whole situation was not adding up. Now the only thing I could do was going out and figuring it out for myself.
Hand in hand the girls both started to walk towards the blinding light. Reaching closer with every step. They reached the portal and together touched it. A blinding light covered their whole body. While swallowed by their own thoughts and worries, they finally had started to walk the path of the future while embracing their past and honouring the present, finally ready to discard their identities to fight for their desired futures.