My mother and I got out of the car that was being driven by an assistant manager and in front of us we saw a large property with several interconnected buildings, which houses members of the Kamo clan. My mother's nervousness, which had been with her since the morning, seemed to have gotten even worse at the sight of this place that must be familiar to her. I take a deep breath, take her hand and assure her that we will both be fine, while I give the best comforting smile I can, mother relaxes her shoulders and ruffles my hair, so we move on.
We are welcomed by Noritoshi, who just asks us to follow him. Upon entering the property is when I discover how vast it really is, it is full of dormitories, places for training, open and closed sky, and a lot of other structures that I don't recognize the purpose of, all having the traditional Japanese style, making me notice the how truly conservative they are.
- We're here, I'll be waiting outside for anything. - The student explains in a monotonous way.
- Thank you very much. The meeting may take a while, so if you need to or if you feel tired, you can leave. - My mother says warmly, receiving a nod in response.
We entered what I believe to be the main building, without walking far we came across the meeting room. The door is a shoji, the lighting comes from cloud-shaped chandeliers, the walls are painted a dark cyan blue, at the top having a golden pattern of Japanese Green Pheasant, the national bird of Japan, and right in the middle of the room there is a low table. Despite the very little decoration it is still quite elegant and cozy, the lack of windows somehow helps with this.
- Please sit down - The head of the Kamo clan asks.
- Thank you very much for your hospitality Takeshi. - Masako thanks him by tilting her spine a few degrees.
We calmly sat down in front of the leader and his wife. We remain silent when a maid comes in and serves everyone green tea, as soon as she leaves we start drinking, still in silence, which makes me a little nervous, as I can clearly feel the tension between the two women.
- It's been a long time since we've seen each other Masako-san. - Kamo-sama's wife says in a sickly sweet tone. - And it's a pleasure to meet you Hana-chan. - She adds.
- It's a pleasure to meet you too, Kamo-sama. - I try to be as respectful as possible.
- Please call me mother or Mayumi, after all I am your father's wife. - She asks me, leaving me completely surprised.
- Wait! He is my father?!? The head of the Kamo clan? - I question in extreme surprise.
- Oh? Didn't Masako tell you? What a disappointment... In that case, let me introduce myself. I am Kamo Takeshi, head of the Kamo clan and your father! - He reveals with a mocking smile.
- It's... A pleasure to meet you, I'm Watanabe Hana, grade two jujutsu sorcerer and I recently became head of the Watanabe clan. - I will return it in the same energy.
- It must be incredible to have already achieved the status of clan leader at such a young age, right? - Mayumi asks.
- It's really impressive, but I never doubted my genes. - My father says confidently.
- Thank you, it really is something that I value a lot, although I would still be very happy even if my mother remained the leader, after all I understand that the main reason for this was because I have cursed techniques and can see curses. - I humbly confess.
- You really are a copy of Masako-san, aren't you? - My stepmother(?) says curiously. - Not that this is all bad, after all her skills in fencing, archery and cooking are very good, but she is terrible with political issues. - Miss Kamo complains disrespectfully.
- You can't be good at everything, right Mayumi-san? - Mom throws back the insult.
- You... - The woman with her hair tied up begins to get angry.
- Stop, you two, this is not the time for female rivalry! - Takeshi recalls them irritably.
- Sorry. - They both ask for forgiveness at the same time.
- Now Hana please tell me more about your achievements and cursed techniques. - My father asks with expectations.
- My techniques are blood manipulation and waterbending. I already have excellent control of both, I have recently been training to use them together, learning domain expansion, maximum and reverse cursed technique, although I have already learned to heal myself using blood manipulation. - I speak in an ostentatious way, since it's not often that I can boast.
- HOW? How were you able to achieve this? - The head of the clan asks astonish.
- Well... I had already heard that blood can be used to heal injuries, using platelets. So during a mission against a semi-one level cursed spirit I used this theory to heal my injuries. - I explain this terrible memory.
- What happened on this mission? - My mother asks, very worried.
- That's impressive. - Takeshi mutters thoughtfully. - Would you mind teaching this to the rest of the clan tomorrow? - He asks excitedly.
- Uh... I don't know if I can, since I don't know my mother's schedule. - I try to justify it smiling.
- What does her agenda have to do with you? Will you only teach if she is present? - Mayumi questions confused.
- Well, I don't think my mother would let me come this far without her. - I try to explain.
- What do you mean come? You will live here from now on. - The man appears confused.
- WHAT?!? - Mom and I screamed in exasperation.
- What do you mean she's going to live here? I didn't agree with that! - My mother warns, irritated.
- We know, but Takeshi, as her father, has the right. - His wife explains.
- He really would have... If it was on the birth certificate! - Masako appears more confident and lively.
- What? - The man asks in a state of alert.
- I tried to contact you several times during and after my pregnancy, unfortunately because I didn't receive a response I ended up leaving paternity blank on the birth certificate. - The smaller woman says with a mischievous smile.
- You can not do that! - My father denies it irritably.
- Not only can I, but I have already done it. - My mother responds.
- This is unacceptable! - Takeshi complains discontentedly.
- Since you decided to abandon me and not even look back, I ended up believing that you didn't want your kid either, that you never even met. - The woman I respect most in this life explains discontentedly.
- I thought that last time you weren't pregnant, the test was negative. - He tries to argue.
- Me too! But two months later my period still hadn't arrived, I went to the doctor and discovered I was pregnant. I talked to my gynecologist and she explained the reason it was probably negative was because I didn't have enough hCG for the text to consider it positive. - She explains sadly.
- Is this really possible? - I ask confused.
- Yes, the pregnancy test works based on the amount of hCG in the body, which is a hormone that a woman produces when she is pregnant. If it is negative, but if you still believe that you are pregnant, you should try at least a week after or close to your period. - My mother explains.
- I did not know that. - He whispers thoughtfully.
- I didn't even know it could give a false negative... - Mayumi murmurs, impressed.
- I only found out from my gynecologist.- Mother confesses with an embarrassed smile.
- I'm sure that if I take a DNA test and it comes back positive, I can get custody of Hana. - Takeshi provokes.
- He would have to accept living with you first. - Masako discourages.
- No offense, however I know my mother and I'm used to it being just the two of us. - I try to protest.
- Don't worry, we'll spend a lot of time together, so we can get to know each other. - My father announces with a smile.
- I can assure you that choosing us is a great idea, after all, I am a great stepmother. - Mayumi states confidently.
- That is it! - The leader of the Kamo clan has an realization. - Hana-chan, did you know you have a half brother? - He questions with a macabre smile.
- Serious? Who... Noritoshi-senpai! - Suddenly I have a realization. - I'm Noritoshi-senpai's half-brother?!? - I question in disbelief.
- Exactly, wait a second. NORITOSHI COME HERE! - Takeshi shouts calling the other.
- Yes father? Did you call me? - The Kyoto student asks calmly.
- Come closer, I want to introduce you to your younger half-brother Kamo Hana! - The head of the clan introduces me.
- It's actually Watanabe Hana. - I correct him uncomfortably.
- Small details that we can change in the future, just like your name. - The man with the mustache declares.
- My name... ? - I ask confused.
- Yes, after all you want to have a masculine name, don't you? - He questions.
- Yes! - I agree without even thinking. - However, I still haven't thought of a name and... - I blurt out embarrassed.
-Haru. - My mother says, leaving me confused. - The name I planned to give if I had a boy was Haru. - She confesses with a sad smile.
- Hana and Haru... That's just like you, Masako. - Takeshi praises.
- Sorry for intruding, but what do you mean by half brothers? I was aware of the failed attempts to unite the Watanabe clan with Kamo, however I was not informed about... - The boy finds himself unable to continue the sentence.
- Yes, at that time we were not yet aware of you having inherited the blood manipulation technique, in fact we would not even have thought or checked whether you had it, if Masako had gotten pregnant... Well, told us that she had gotten pregnant. - The father confesses in a carefree way, not caring at all about Noritoshi's feelings.
- I see... - The son whispers, not seeming surprised by the revelation.
- I see that you adults still have a lot to talk about, why don't Kamo-senpai and I take the opportunity to go for a walk? - I suggest.
- Of course, it's a great idea. Noritoshi enjoy and show your little brother the Kamo residence. - Takeshi says, giving a wink.
- Watanabe-kohai please come with me. - My older brother asks, which I quickly obey.
We left the room as quickly as possible without looking suspicious or strange, we didn't need to speak to know that we both didn't want to stay with our father much longer. I don't know why, but something about him seemed very wrong to me, maybe it could be because he abandoned my mother, making me already have a bad impression.
Looking at Noritoshi a little, I can see his similarities with his father, they both have very straight and dark hair, and he takes his very thin eyes from his mother. I have the same hair tone as him, but so does my mother, come to think of it, I really look like a copy of her, we are almost a clone, even in terms of skills we are similar, our only difference is our hair style and that I am good at football.
- Hey Watanabe-Kohai... - Kamo catches my attention. - I don't know what he said before I came in, but think about it a little and don't feel pressured into anything, okay? - The boy assures me.
- Thank you, but don't worry, I think it's just the revelation and the fact of meeting the father who was never there getting to me. - I try to leave the subject aside.
- It's quite complicated to be part of the main families, isn't it? - He asks after a while, making me laugh a little.
- I think so... - I agree, smiling.
- There's a training area, want to try it? I heard you know how to use a bow and arrow, there are a lot of them there. - He suggests.
- Of course, just don't complain when I humiliate you. - I joke with a confident smile.
- The bow is my main weapon. - He states confidently.
- I learned to use a bow and arrow since I was eight years old, I even had to train while riding a horse. - I show off.
- Serious? I thought samurai learned to use swords first. - Noritoshi says confused.
- Yes, we first started learning how to handle weapons, around the age of six and seven. - I explain with emphasis on the last part.
- That must have been complicated, having to learn to fight when you were barely literate. - My brother speaks worriedly.
- In fact, we start to become literate and learn calculations from the age of three. - I confess, embarrassed.
- I will never find the Kamo clan's way of teaching extreme again. - He murmurs.
- If you think that's bad, imagine that after I got used to stationary targets I had to use live animals. - Agreeing with his concern, after all, if I weren't someone who reincarnated I would have suffered much more trauma.
~~~~~~~~~~~
- Come on Hana-chan! Today you will have a surprise, let's move on to the next part of the training. - Keiko-sensei says very happily.
- I'm coming, it's not my fault that Dália didn't want to leave the stable. - Irritated argument, riding my mare who has a beautiful light brown coat.
- Yes, yes... Now let's go! - My teacher goes ahead with Pegasus, her majestic horse. - And don't be so hurt, after all your mother is going to join us today, she's already waiting for us. - She reveals, leaving me excited.
- Serious? Has she really returned from her trip? - I ask hopefully.
- Yes! Masako came back while you were sleeping and left early to prepare the surprise. - Saito explains happily.
- I normally don't like your surprises, but since my mother is involved I was curious, what is it? - I question with a mischievous smile, thinking about several possibilities.
- If I tell you it will ruin the surprise, so you will have to wait.
Keiko-sensei said it was a new stage of training, so I'm quite curious, if my mother is involved it can't be that bad... Why should my teacher be a crazy person, like Hange from Attack on Titan? Seeing this type of person in anime is really cool, but in real life it's shit, you never know when you're going to find yourself in a dangerous situation and it's going to be precisely because of them.
It's a miracle that I made it past ten... It's been four months since my birthday, it won't be long before another eight months pass, time really goes by quickly. It's been so long since I was reincarnated... Sometimes I wonder what it would be like if I hadn't died, thirty years is so young... Did they find out it was Carmen and Tomás' fault? That they murdered me on my birthday? Are they in jail suffering for their actions?
I continued to wonder about this kind of thing for the rest of the trip. On horseback we went up and down some mountains, we went along dirt, stone and a small part of asphalt paths, at some point we got off the horses and crossed a river on foot, guiding them by the reins. No matter how many times I pass this path, I will always consider the landscape to be beautiful.
After two and a half hours of traveling we arrived at the Saito property, we released the horses in the small stable that is closest to the edge of the land, we always let them rest a little after all this walking. Without wasting time I head to the house furthest from the rest of the property, after all the first thing we do is train the katas, which are a series of exercises that serve to meditate and control the body, they are what gave rise to judo and karate.
Finally, after half an hour of Katas, I am dismissed and can take a miniscule fifteen minute break. I take advantage of the time by going to the bathroom, eating and drinking the meals that other members of the Saito clan made for me. At fourteen minutes I start heading towards where my bow and wakizashi are, because I don't want to have the misfortune of being late, after all samurai teachers are very strict, luckily I arrive at the stable just in time, to meet Keiko-sensei taking out our horses.
- Come soon Hana-chan, we don't have time to waste. - She says very excitedly.
- I'm right behind. - I confirm with fun.
- From today onwards we will no longer use mannequins as targets, we will have new and more complicated ones. - The teacher reveals, leaving me a little apprehensive.
- And what would these new targets be? - I ask worried.
- ... Hana-chan are you aware of how on average two hundred animals are abandoned in shelters? And if they are not adopted within three to seven days, they are usually discarded? - She questions me, making me extremely uncomfortable with where this conversation was going.
- Where do you want to go? - I ask very worried, praying internally that it doesn't go where I think it will.
- You have no idea that animal shelters are very happy to dispose of several animals at the same time, especially if they are not the ones who are going to kill them. - My teacher reveals it.
- I know that centuries ago it was common for samurai to train archery by shooting dogs, but... - I find myself unable to finish speaking.
- It's time for you to start putting your teachings into practice. - Keiko says seriously.
- You can't be serious. - I try to deny the reality of the situation.
- Sorry Hana-chan, it was your mother who said you were ready. - The young adult confesses with a slight sadness. - But don't worry, we're not going to shoot dogs, we're going to skip this step and go straight to pigs. Get ready because today you're not just going to rip off your first head, but you're also going to learn how to slaughter animals - She adds.
~~~~~~~~~~~
- Watanabe-kohai? Everything is fine? - Kamo-senpai asks worriedly.
- Yes, don't worry, I just got lost in some bad memories. - I reassure him.
- It was about... - He asks sadly.
- Please, I don't want to talk or remember anymore. - I ask looking at the small Koi pond.
- No problem, let's release this frustration on the bow, do you want? - Noritoshi suggests.
- Definitely! - I agree without hesitation.
We go to one of the open arenas, the one we used is specifically for archery, very reminiscent of those hit-the-target games that are very common at Carnival in Brazil. There is a line determining a distance of what I believe to be twenty meters from the first target, the second being fifty meters away and the last accessed being ninety meters away.
- Do you think you can do it? - My older brother asks.
- Definitely! After all, I already had to train to shoot at distances of three hundred meters. - I boast smiling.
- Huh? You're lying, bows can't launch arrows past a hundred meters. - He states irritated.
- Not with normal bows, but with those used by samurai, which measure around two meters in length, you can shoot an arrow up to four hundred meters away. - I reveal rolling my eyes. - Give me here and I'll show you how to do it, I'll hit that tree behind the last target. - I say confidently.
- Very well, I will watch this feat. If you get it right I'll owe you one, okay? - The boy with "closed" eyes proposes.
- Sure! - I happily agree.
Smiling, I take one of the bows and an arrow, separate my legs, adjust the position of my shoulders and confidently release the arrow. To Noritoshi's surprise and my happiness, it hits exactly where I said it would, in the tree that is approximately ninety-two meters away from the shooting marker.
- You really did that... - He says in disbelief. - Do you think you could teach me or at least help me improve my aim and range? - Kamo asks with a soft smile.
- Of course! - I agree excitedly. - Let's start with the basics, show me how you hold a bow. - I explain less playfully.
So a few hours passed, with me giving one or two tips to him and him to me, that afternoon I finally tried to control an arrow bathed in my blood, it was confusing and complicated in the moments when I couldn't see it, but not impossible. I ended up being praised for my ability to learn quickly, Noritoshi even said that he thinks maybe I might have a gift for that.
During our time together I was able to learn much more about him than I ever imagined, I always saw him as one of the straight-laced characters like Lida from My Hero Academia, in fact he is a bad example, after all he has already tried to kill someone... Anyway, Kamo is quite fun and even used bad words sometimes when he missed a target, it's pretty crazy to think that we are linked by blood.
This all reminded me of Yuji and how he would react to the information that I actually had a half-brother. Would he be happy? Would he accept Noritoshi? If he doesn't accept it, he would be being hypocritical, since he is Choso, Eso and Kechizu's half-brother... I really need to talk to Itadori about them, I'll take the opportunity to do that tomorrow.
- If you just had to kill pigs why did she say all that about animal shelters? - Noritoshi asks confused
- Precisely to make me believe that I would have to hunt dogs. - I explain extremely upset.
- Your sensei has a strong personality, huh? - He whispers uncomfortably.
- Hana-kun! - I hear my mother scream.
- Mother? I am here! - I respond confused.
- I'm glad I finally found you. - She says gratefully.
- So you were around here, huh? - My father appears behind her thoughtfully.
- Did you manage to reach a consensus? - I question cautiously.
- More or less yes. From time to time you will spend a few days here, to learn more about the kamo clan and be able to show what you have already learned. The rest we are still discussing to see how we are going to do it. - He explains in a disappointed way. - During this week you will stay here, don't worry, the school has authorized it and we will take you there by car every day. - Takeshi adds.
- Wow, it's like you've already thought of everything... I'll do my best to be a good visitor in the meantime. - I declare timidly.
- Don't worry, I'm sure you will be. - The tallest one agrees. - Now we better go, dinner will be served any moment. - He reveals.
Me, my mother and Noritoshi followed the Kamo clan head to a dining area. The entrance was a shoji, the walls were a yellowish beige tone, a part of the floor is higher, where the chairs are, lighting coming from the sides of the room, from a hidden light, with the floor, chairs and wooden table. For an appetizer we enjoyed miso soup, the main course was the traditional salmon teppan, and for dessert we had banana harumaki.
Throughout the meal I could feel the tension between my mother and Mayumi, I don't know their history, but I can't help but think that their disagreement is on me. After all, I also wouldn't be happy to be infertile and see my significant other trying and having children with others, with my permission or not.
- Noritoshi, could you take your brother to the guest room? I will guide Masako to her quarters in the meantime. - Takeshi asks.
- Don't worry, you can leave it to me. - The eldest son obediently agrees.
With that we said goodbye to the adults and started heading towards another of the houses, possibly the one with the bedrooms. At that moment, for some reason, I remember Kenjaku and Gojo talking about how I could find more information with my family.
- Hey... Big brother? - I murmur hopefully. - Can I call you like that? - I question embarrassedly afterwards.
- Of course, it will take a while for me to get used to it, but obviously you can. - He says smiling.
- Uh... Remember how you said you'd owe me one if I hit the tree and that I managed to hit it? - I ask looking at the moon.
- Yes, what about that? What favor do you want? - Kamo asks with crossed arms and a tired voice.
- Is there a place where the Kamo clan keeps old information? - I ask nervously.
- Why do you ask that? - The boy with dark eyes asks suspiciously.
- There's something I need to know about my origins and I didn't find anything in my house or in my mother's things. It's Gojo-sensei who suggested that the Kamo clan might have what I'm looking for. - I explain in my most convincing tone possible.
- We have a library with the history of the clan and among other things, I can take you there, as long as you promise not to go to sleep too late. - He declares.
- That's fine with me, just show me where this library is, please. - I beg excitedly, I must sound like a child.
- Okay, okay. Just follow me. - Noritoshi says after letting out a long sigh.
He takes me to the house where the library is located, the first thing I notice when we enter is how big the place really is, there are corridors with entire walls of shelves full of the most diverse books, I wouldn't be surprised if they told me that there are more than a thousand books. Some are visibly very old, while others are obviously new, taking a closer look at the books it becomes apparent that none of them are fiction, romance or anything like that, just historical or telling things about jujutsu.
I thank my senior, before I start searching for anything that talks about reincarnation, after all I know it will take time for me to find it. The shelves are perfectly organized by era, unfortunately this doesn't help me much, I just take the opportunity to look in the sections from one hundred and fifty, four hundred and thousand years ago, after all, these eras were the only ones in the past in which something important related to Kenjaku happened in the manga .
In the first of the three eras I only found out about the old Kamo Noritoshi and the atrocities he committed. I already had a little idea what Kenjaku did, but damn! This book made a point of explaining everything in detail, I'm going to be traumatized, not without even being able to think or look at Choso and Kenjaku in the same way. My respect for Choso is at stratospheric levels, he is incredible as an older brother and as a person, I can't wait to meet him, I hope he recognizes me as someone trustworthy and an ally, after all I've known and looked after Yuji for a few years , besides my mother having adopted him.
The next era didn't have much important things, however the difference in the level of sorcerers became more apparent. In the past, our number was much greater, geniuses constantly appeared, there were even more curses and I believe that the average power of sorcerers was two... No, three levels stronger than today.
The last of the eras, that of a thousand years ago in the Heian period, when Sukuna was the pinnacle of sorcery, there are more books about it than there are stars in the sky. This way I will never sleep again, either because of how much I have to read, or because of how violent and descriptive these texts are. Maybe I should stop for today and continue tomorrow... I'll read just one more and then I'll stop.
I grab the one closest to me and start reading. Oh? The tale about Yamamba, a man-eating witch, I remember that one, was the one with Watanabe no Tusna and Raikō. Oh! Okay, sometimes I forget that Watanabe no Tsuna lived in the Heian era. Now that I think about it, had he ever come across or met Sukuna? I'll have to ask about him tomorrow.
Or I could try to find out by reading a little more... I've never been a reading person, but I've always been an early riser and it's not even midnight... Just another half hour and then I'll go to bed! I declare to myself, knowing full well that I will pass this hour like every other time I've been in situations like this.
It is quite interesting to see the differences in historical texts, legends and the point of view of the Jujutsu world. The same event, but different points of view. They differ in almost everything and at the same time they are the same! It's funny to discover that the demons that my ancestor was recognized for having killed really existed, but they were curses.
There are stories about Watanabe no Tsuna that I had never heard of, he has fought against so many different cursed spirits that I didn't even know it was possible for there to be so many of such a high level. In the middle of these stories, the books started to focus more on the subject of reincarnation and Gakis, because I didn't know what they were I searched on Google, which somehow still had a signal, even though it was on an isolated property, and I discovered that they are a type of vampire, Looking deeper, I find a definition saying that they are when a person dies and is reborn as another creature, in another world.
All of this made me realize that I'm close to perhaps finding the information I'm looking for, at least that's what I thought and I would be right if the damn books didn't skim the surface of the subject. They keep mentioning the Gakis, reincarnation, rebirth and transmigration, but they never go deeper into the subject. It's frustrating!
I understood that somehow Watanabe no Tsuna is interconnected with these things, that it is quite possible that he was reincarnated too, but please explain more about this! Urgh, why do things always seem to be going against me? Having been murdered, continually meeting Yuji by chance when I'm trying not to get involved, not being able to stop Yuji from eating Sukuna's finger, the future not changing regardless of what I do and now not finding the information I'm most looking for . Damn it!
With all the strength and hatred I have I punch one of the walls, I believe I may have even used cursed energy in that punch, with how angry I am, because of that the nearby shelf shakes and drops a mountain of books . I whisper a swear word and go to pick up what I dropped, I end up noticing a book that is very old, with a worn black cover, beige pages already turning slightly yellow, and a large amount of dust, unlike the rest of the books here, which all look like have been restored.
However, what surprises me most is the page that falls out, it is written in the Western alphabet. This paralyzes me, to the point where I am unable to think about anything other than what is in my hands, which is why I don't notice my father entering the library.
- Hana-chan? What are you doing up here? - He asks worriedly.
- AHHHH! - Scared scream. - Oh... It's just you. - I notice when I calm down from the initial shock and hide the paper behind my back.
- Yes, who else would it be? - He jokes. - So what are you doing here at this hour? - Takeshi asks more seriously.
- I just wanted to look at the books for a bit, before going to sleep, sorry if I did something wrong. - I lie in the most confident way possible.
- I see... But I'm going to have to ask you to go to sleep, it's past midnight, it's too late for a child to be awake. - Father scolds me.
- Don't worry, I was going to sleep, I'm just going to tidy up the books I dropped. - I explain with a smile.
- Very well, good night then Hana-chan. - He says leaving.
As quickly as possible, I organize the books, hide the one that was still in my hands and run to the guest room. Once there I do my night routine, then lie down and cover myself completely, under the covers I turn on the flashlight on my cell phone and start reading the note.
~~~~~~~~~~~
Dear José Weber Carter
It's a pleasure to meet you again, son, I beg your forgiveness for not having been present in your life, today I realize how selfish and stupid my suicide was. It fills me with sadness to know that you died, I don't know how old you will be when that happens, but I hope it will be at an advanced age and with as few regrets as possible.
I will try to be brief in my explanations, yes I am your mother, Coral Carter, how do I know you will receive this letter? It's something you'll discover when you're ready, all you should know is that we both reincarnated for a reason, what reason? I don't know yours, only you can find that out.
This was a second chance the gods gave you, so use it wisely. Yes, deities are real and you have probably already met one of them, whether in childhood, in a dream or fainting in this second life. Find what they want you to do and finish the job, so when you die you can choose between finally resting or reincarnating again.
Today I really regret not being there for you, Carmen and Tomás. I wish I could have said and done so many things with you, I really regret being unable to see you grow into incredible man. The gods allowed me to speak to you just once, to give you a single warning, to prepare you for this life, I know they won't let me tell you more things when I see you, so I will say in this letter the reasons for me committing suicide were not It's your fault, never think like that, because I love you from the bottom of my heart.
~~~~~~~~~~~
I finish reading the first page in shock, confusion, despair, happiness, sadness, helplessness and a mix of other emotions. With my thoughts racing a mile a minute, I turn off the light, I put away my cell phone and the note, just to lie down and try to fall asleep, after all this can't be real, it must be tiredness, tomorrow I'll wake up and see that it was just a bad joke of my mind
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𝐓𝐎 𝐁𝐄 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐔𝐄𝐃---->