I didn't know what was going to happen, I didn't know what these sick bastards were about to do to me, so there was no way I could allow myself to lose conscience at this moment in time.
Unfortunately, the mental and physical wear that I had experienced in the last days, and especially today was beyond what I could handle.
Even though I was trying to bite as much as I could on my lips or on my tongue, I was still unable to reverse the damned natural order that my body required.
I couldn't afford to lose conscience but it didn't seem like I had much of a say in this situation. I could only surrender no matter how unwilling I was.
'Baannngggggg~! pssssshhhhttttt~!'
"Don't even think of losing conscience and escaping your punishment you fu*cking motherfu*cker!"
Just as I was about to fall into the unexplored areas of dreamland, for best or worst the fu*cking guy in charge of my punishment hit me on the head with an iron rod and then burned me with his cigarette.
It was painful!
Extremely fu*cking painful!
'Piiinnggggggggg~!'
The moment that the iron rod landed on my head I could heard a deafening sound inside my head, making me wonder why the hell I started all this.
Despite all that, it felt like it was really necessary because the pain helped me return back to 'myself' and at the same time all sorts of memories started returning back to my head.
"Ugggghhhhhhh~!"
It was extremely painful, I could feel my head exploding at that moment, or better yet it felt like I was about to disappear completely.
"Boss you didn't turn him into an idiot, did you!? How are we going to answer to Young Master and his family if that happened!?"
"That shouldn't have happened, right!? I didn't hit him that hard, did I!?"
While those two bastards were having their own thoughts and ideas about the situation, the headache that I was going through it felt like it would fully destroy me.
For some reason, it felt like something had exploded inside my head and a terrifying battle for survival was taking place.
At this moment I was desperate, there was no way I was going to allow anything to happen to me, right now.
The moment that I disappeared from this world, then the cow-licked fu*cker would turn all his hate and attention towards my family, my parents, and my sister.
That couldn't be allowed to happen!
All sorts of images were flashing in front of my conscience, details that I might have forgotten for a long time, details that I might have never paid attention, information from the moment I was born.
Strangely these memories weren't only mine, or at least they didn't feel like they were only mine.
After all, those were memories of being born from a special ground, being born as a treasure of Heaven and Earth, being born as an extremely special being.
Being protected from a Dragon like monster, and then being robbed away from what seemed like a soldier, going through many owners and finally landing unwillingly into the head of an unrelated fool.
Getting roots into the head of the fool, sucking his blood and soul slowly to gain full control of the body, only to suffer more and more.
How many times had this body gone close to death, how many times had he already been tortured, how many times had he been ready to give up and die.
During this whole time 'I' had used all sorts of ways to protect, defend, stabilize, and empower the bastard, only to end up suffering even more.
Even now 'I' was trying my best to keep this bastard alive, only to end up overexerting my strength and will and ended up exploding.
At some point in time I would have gotten rid of that body of mine, I would suck all my bloodline and then fully take over the body I had decided to nest upon.
But now was too soon, too fast, I wasn't ready for this, but there wasn't much of a choice in front of me either, I could only fight for survival.
Fight desperately for survival, just like that idiot was doing!
My head was in tatters, I felt just like I had received the beating of these recent days thousands of times stronger.
During this time I hadn't noticed when but at some point in time I was thinking of those other thoughts as 'mine' as well.
It was extremely weird! I couldn't understand what the hell was going on!
After the first traumatic shock of pain, the headache started reducing and I could feel that I was getting better, but at the same time I felt myself getting stranger.
A lot of knowledge and memories had been added in my head all of a sudden, and even though the worst seemed to have been left behind, I was still unable relax.
It was extremely weird to suddenly feel like two different persona, two different characters, two different beings had actually been combined to one.
That wasn't all, I could feel that my head was about to burst up due to the heavy load of information.
It was just like trying to fill a 2 litres bottle of water with the pacific ocean entirely.
What made everything even more unbelievable was that the memories from the other 'me' seemed to be going for more than a thousand years.
How the heck was that even possible?
Is there any animate object that could live for that long? It was practically impossible to happen.
It didn't matter now though, the game seemed really close to being over for me, I was just one hair's breadth away from my death.
I don't want to die, I can't die, I can't allow myself to die!
Think!
Think for fu*cks sake!
There should be a way for me to survive!
'If we keep fighting we are both going to disappear as it's going, why don't we merge!? I can help you survive, as long as you never give up in the future!
We will become one!'
Just as I thought that things couldn't even get worse than this, I heard a voice inside my head, a voice inside my mind speaking such words to myself.
It was unbelievable, I didn't believe it myself! But for some reason I couldn't negate it, and most importantly I couldn't pretend I didn't hear it, because there was hope in that voice.
Too tired to fight against everything and in desperate need of a little help, I couldn't help but willingly or unwillingly agree to the offer.
'Ok, I promise!'
'Then drop down your defences and let everything under my control!'
'Are you fucking with me!? I have no fu*cking idea who or what you are, and you want me to trust you with everything, even my existence!?
Get real for fu*cks sake or we will both disappear now!'
'Tchee~! Concentrate on yourself, concentrate on your mind and come in front of me! If you are unable to even do that, then there is no meaning to it even if we merge together!'
I was pissed, I was fu*cking pissed!
The pain I was going through just made the situation worse, but now wasn't the time to think about that. I needed to steel my balls and do as I was told to.
With those thoughts in mind I tried with everything I had to completely shut down my surroundings and try to concentrate only on myself, on my mind, on my conscience, on my sentience.
It's difficult, extremely fu*cking difficult but I can do this!
I know that it sounds like a cringe friendship is power anime, but that was all I could do while I was trying with every bit of strength that I had left.
Don't know how much time had passed, but I was finally able to reach the insides of my conscience and was finally able to see the 'voice' inside me, the other 'me' inside me.
I don't know if it was meant to be as a joke towards me and my way of living until now, but what I had in front of me was nothing else but a worm.
The worm was white and long about 10 cm I would say, but at the end of the day it was nothing but a worm. Could this thing really be able to help me!?
Even I wasn't able to accept and admit that I was about to merge with a worm!
'At least you aren't completely useless! I hope that one day I won't regret this and kill myself due to this stupid mistake of mine!'
With that said, he jumped towards me, towards I would most probably call my soul avatar that was just like an x-ray version of myself, and immediately headed for my 'head' in there.
'We don't have time to take it slowly and merge, we can only do this as fast as we can, just follow my lead and the practice that I have just released in your head!
You only have 10 minutes as the situation outside seemed to be getting really messy for us…'