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"You have to do the opposite of what people expect. How else will you surprise them? That's my motto."
- Victor Nikiforov, (Yuri!!! on Ice)
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<(Bruce Wayne POV)>
"So, will you finally tell me where we are going and what type of carriage we are riding on? And how long till we meet your family? By the way, how many people are there in your family? You never told me anything about them." Diana threw a volley of questions towards me with an eager expression on her face as she continued probing for information.
After we arrived at the mainland through Piraeus harbor in the city of Athens, Diana suddenly had a change of personality. Her calm silent visage disappeared as she became an over-chatterer, questioning almost everything she laid her eyes on, her curiosity bubbling out like lava. I understood that this was a new world for her and that her child-like curiosity should be normal but honestly, her constant questions about everything she saw were getting a little annoying. After all, this was already her 100th query for the day.
But still, I didn't let the annoyance show on my face as I patiently tried to answer all her questions, no matter how many there were, "We are going to the hotel where my family is supposed to be staying and this carriage here is called a car. We will be reaching our destination in about half an hour. As for my family, I haven't told you a lot about them, have I? Well, I guess our conversations were seldom about my life and more about the general world... You see, both my parents died when I was young, so I have been raised by my butler, Alfred. He is an honest old man whom I trust with my life.
But besides that, I also have a lot of good... friends whom I consider family as well. You will meet them soon enough. Oh, and there is also Cortana, my trusted AI confidante and assistant. She handles almost all the machines I create including the drones that helped protect your homeland from the recent invasion. But again, you have already met her, haven't you?" I added after noticing my bracelet lightly blinking with a cyan-blue hue, proof that Cortana was actively listening to us.
Of course, this wasn't the original bracelet that I had lost in the storm but a new copy that I had as backup stored in my lab. Cortana just delivered it to me in Themyscira after the war.
"Indeed, I have. My mother and I had a conversation with her when you were resting after the battle. She is quite cheerful and worries about you a lot. Also, she sounded extremely loyal since she mentioned that you created her from something called code, much like how my mother created me from clay with the help of Zeus' last miracle." Diana stated with a wise look on her face. "Anyway, what do you mean by your butler, Bruce? You have a manservant?"
"He is not a servant, Diana. He is family." I instantly replied with a slightly more assertive voice than I would have liked.
"I-I apologize. I didn't mean to demean you or this Alfred. I was simply curious because Lady Helena had once told us that the rich and powerful in man's world hired servants for all their work. I simply thought that Alfred was one such person. I am sorry." Diana quickly apologized in a hurry with a slightly troubled face.
"It's okay, Diana. You wouldn't have known. A lot of people make fun of the fact that a rich orphan who has everything in the world is being raised by his "manservant" but unfortunately nobody understands that Alfred is much more than just a servant or a caretaker to me. He is someone who has always been with me in this life, someone I never thought I would care much for, but I still do. To speak the truth..., he is the parent I never asked for, but one I needed to be what I am... After all, Batman is incomplete without an Alfred." I muttered with a chuckle as I continued to drive the car in silence.
By the way, it was quite interesting to know that Diana doesn't have an actual biological father in this universe. Seems like the Olympian God king just handed over some of his divine godly power to the Queen to help create Diana before he disappeared to God knows where... Wait a fucking minute, don't tell me that Hippolyta sculpted Diana from clay using Zeus' magical jizz or something!
"And what about your other friends? Are they very close to you? Do you think they will accept being my friends as well?" Diana tried to steer the conversation in a more light-hearted direction, breaking me away from my disgusting thoughts and making me look at the Amazonian princess with a puzzled gaze.
"I think they will, they are very friendly... and yes, they are somewhat very close to me," I answered with a perplexed look as I remembered how most of the girls felt about me.
After all, I wasn't a dense idiot like some shonen MC. I knew they had romantic feelings for me, but the thing was one needs to have skin as thick as the hardest military-grade steel to be a harem protagonist and tell their lovers to share him between them, it was a skill that I quite disappointingly haven't developed yet.
Still, I was already thrilled with three girls agreeing to date me simultaneously. I didn't feel the need to complicate things further by trying to pursue more. After all, managing a harem was just as tedious a task as creating one... However, some innocent flirting was harmless, right?
"I see." Diana nodded, pleased at my answer.
"Hey Diana, are you sure that your mother won't be declaring war on us after they find that you have run away from home with me? I really don't want to fight another war for the next couple of years." I asked after a couple of minutes of silence, wondering if I should contact Hippolyta through Cortana's drones and tell her that Diana was safe with me.
"I am sure that she won't do anything like that. I am old enough to make my own decisions now, my mother herself admitted this, even you heard it... Plus, it seemed like Mother trusted you for some reason and even harbored some respect for you in her heart after you helped defeat Hercules, Ares, and Iapetus, three of the greatest dangers to our people. She will think twice before declaring war... I think" Diana responded with a straight face that didn't seem to exude much confidence.
"... You think?" I asked with a gulp.
"Well, maybe I decided to leave too hastily. I probably should have waited till the Night of Love that was scheduled to be held the night you left."
"Night of Love?" I asked while raising a brow.
"Just like we celebrate Hera being at her purest when she regains her purity for her husband every year, we also celebrate a night of passion to respect the blessings of goddess Aphrodite on us Amazons. On that night, Amazons... take part in different bodily pleasures as much as they want under the open sky around a holy fire by giving in to their throes of passion, although my mother never seemed to participate in it herself nor let me or anyone else from the royal family and the royal guards participate in it as well. She considers it to be below us and only meant for the truly "frustrated" Amazons, whatever that is supposed to mean." Diana casually replied while curiously staring at a plane that was flying over us.
'Wait... did she just say that Amazonians of this particular universe celebrate a religious night by having lesbian sex in the open?... Does that mean I just missed an Amazonian orgy because I left a day early?' I thought, in disbelief as I tried to imagine the scene of thousands of Amazons making love to each other around a campfire.
"Why do you suddenly have tears in your eyes, Bruce? Are you feeling some sort of discomfort or pain?" Diana asked after noticing a single tear leaving my eye.
"No, it's okay. There is always next year. Yep, don't worry Diana, I will definitely be taking you back to your home for a visit next year. That's a promise, a man's promise." I said with absolute determination.
"Cortana..."
"I have already added the date to your reminders and calendar, boss. You don't have to worry; you won't miss it next year. Also, I will keep this fact a secret from the others, in fact, I have already sent the information to my more secure servers." My loyal AI assistant chimed in from my bracelet even before I could tell her what I wanted.
"Good, you are the best girl ever, Cortana, a real bro." I nodded in appreciation.
"Are you two discussing some sort of inside joke that I am not privy to?" Diana, who seemed to be too innocent to understand what was happening, curiously tilted her head.
'Hippolyta did me a huge favor by never allowing her daughter in the orgy, otherwise, this would have been extremely awkward. But I do wonder why she never takes part in it herself despite being their absolute ruler for so many centuries. Is it just because she treasures her dignity as a Queen or is there some other deeper reason?' I wondered to myself.
"Sir, I have been trying to give you some privacy and keep work-related stuff away from you as much as possible, but there are a couple of things that really need your attention right now. I don't think it can wait any longer especially since it involves the decision of whether to kill Edward Nashton or not." Cortana suddenly interrupted my thoughts as she displayed small holograms of a stack of documents from my bracelet.
"What? I am driving Cortana; I can't look at any files or documents right now. Is this so important that it can't even wait till we get to the hotel? It is only a fifteen-minute drive from here, you know." I retorted swiping away the hologram that was blocking my vision.
"Negative sir. We must handle this matter now unless, of course, you agree to let Edward blow up the Gotham police HQ." Cortana calmly argued as she displayed a single image of a couple of cars being driven by a bunch of gangsters wearing green jackets and weird masks with weird patterns of question marks drawn all over them. The vehicles were heading at full speed straight towards the direction of the city center where the GCPD HQ was supposed to be located. "Edward Nashton or according to his original birth name, Edward Nygma seems to have just raised the stakes of his game, sir."
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(A/N: Heya guys, I am back after finally being done with my semester exams. And the best thing is I passed them as well... hopefully... I think...)
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