Where were you when it seemed like time stood still?
Were you in the backyard playing with your kids when the fighter jets flew overhead…
Were you on a first date, nervous if she would even show up when gunfire could be heard a couple blocks away…
Were you sitting in the living room, watching the news unfold, when you felt the rumble of tank tracks moving down your suburban street…
Did you witness the mushroom clouds, appearing on the horizon in a flash of white light…
Or did you never see it coming… because you were one of the first to die…
As I looked out to the South and North… all I could think was…
'This is it…'
Two almost identical mushroom clouds hung in the sky, one to the North, the other in the South. I couldn't believe how surreal it looked, seeing the obvious signs of nuclear bombs made me remember the old Cold War training films…
Or the number of tv shows and movies that had nuclear war as its main focus. The one I would most relate it to…
Jericho…
The scene where the little kids are playing hide and go seek, and the boy stands on the rooftop as the little girl is saying that isn't a fair hiding spot, and the camera pans to the boy staring to the setting sun as a mushroom cloud appears over the distant mountains.
I feel just like that little boy right now, I stand outside of the tractor door, on the platform for the stair, unmoving. A look of horror and disbelieve is plastered on my face as my mind just kind of goes…. blank.
I grab my phone and call the one person who I thought always had the answers.
It rings and rings and finally I here the gruff and deep voice that has chewed my ass and given me more words of wisdom then I care to explain.
"Ayden, how's it going? Done with the field?"
I feel like a weight has been lifted off of my shoulders, "Dad, yes I'm done with the field, where are you?"
"In town at the Pub eating, your mom and brother are here too."
"Do not leave there, I'm on my way."
"Wha-.."
He wasn't able to answer as I hung up the phone, getting back in the cab and putting the tractor in gear. I fly down the gravel, turning off the safety locks on the transmission as I hit nearly 40 miles per hour on my way to town.
Thankfully I was only a few miles away from the outskirts of town, not that it really mattered to me right at that moment, but then again, driving a 40-ton tractor into the middle of town really isn't the smartest idea I've ever had.
I came up the main road, feeling like I was flying in the massive machine, as cars pulled to the side of the road and on-lookers stopped to stare at me as I went by.
'You live in a town surrounded by farmland, shouldn't be the first time you've seen a tractor.'
People really do get their interest pulled by the weirdest things, but hey, when I was 7 tractors amazed me too. Just didn't think it would amaze a dude in his 40s.
Anyways, I rounded the bend and main street came into view. The old buildings lining the sides of the road, different little shops, bars, restaurants, and benches line the sidewalks. People and college students celebrating being done with school, moved from place to place going about their days. They turned to look at the massive tractor moving through the middle of town, emergency lights flashing, and traffic blocked both ways.
I slowed to a stop in front of a building with 'Main Street Pub' on a sign plastered to the second floor of the building. Placing the machine in park I almost dove off the 10 ft platform onto the concrete below. Somehow, someway I didn't break anything, and I flew into the restaurant.
The first thing I heard was…
"Ayden…. You better have a damn good reason for bringing that thing into town…."
Yeah…. Dad wasn't too happy with me, but I shook my head and said, "Please tell me you know what's going on, have you checked the news?"
Sitting in a booth near the window, all three of them, my dad, brother, and mom all looked at me like I belonged in a mental asylum.
"Dude what are you talking about? Do you mean the protests? Yeah, we saw them, but they're in the cities and coasts, not around here."
My little brother was quick to point out that he knew everything. He's always been like that though. If he wasn't the smartest in the room or someone proved him wrong, then he'd be bitter about it and come back the next day with a full understanding of the subject. With never being the biggest guy or the best looking, his brain was always one of if not the biggest in the room.
I looked at him, "Man, I was listening to the markets and the emergency signal came over the air….. The country is falling apart…."
They went a little quiet, their faces looking at me with a confused tint to them.
"Ayden, what are you talking about? Yeah, we heard the protests were bad but it wasn't anything that we needed to worry about.." My mom looked at me with the same hint of confusion that, frankly, the entire restaurant was looking at me with.
"Ok listen, so, I saw mush…"
The sounds of sirens cut me off and a loud crash was heard. I looked up from my family to the window and saw a van flipped on its side, slowing to a halt from the skid it took while moving down the street. People rushed outside to see what was going on, my family included.
'This can't be good…'
Police cars were arriving on the scene but the van was hit by a semi that was turning onto main street. The semi blocked the way for the police cars, and in that about minute or so it took for the cops to get past the semi, all hell broke loose.
As I turned from the semi back to the van I saw that the driver, or at least one of the people that were in the van, had gotten out and was limping his way towards us. Blood poured down his head, sealing one of his eyes shut as I'm pretty adrenaline was the only thing keeping him standing.
He came to a stop, probably about 15 yards from us as he looked at the crowd of people standing there. He then turned his head to the area the cops were at as a few officers had gotten out of their cars and were running around the semi.
Looking back towards us he grinned and mumbled something that no one could hear. He raised the detonator in his hand and I could see the explosives wrapped around his chest.
I froze and immediately looked to my family, seeing them stare at the man in shock.
The bomber then shouted the words that will be burned into my head for the rest of my life…
"FOR A NEW WORLD!!!"…..
A flash of light and an immense heat wave followed those words as a small click occurred. He pressed the detonator as the explosives were triggered…
The last thing I saw before being blasted back by the shockwave and fire was my brother and mom, both wrapped in my dads embrace. My dad looked up, and gave a sad smile to me while saying the words, 'I love you'.
I was hit with the shockwave and thrown through the window of the Pub, my body landing under a booth table at the opposite end of the restaurant.
Everything faded to black as I lost consciousness, the sounds of gunfire and screams the carrier of my mind into oblivion as I passed out….
….
….
….
….
"We found one, we found one!!"
My eyes slowly opened as I moved my free arm to wipe some of the dust and dirt from my eyes. My head was spinning as I felt the wake of what just happened wash over me. Someone was pulling away debris from on top of my body, but…. I didn't care….
"Mo-…. Mom?.... Dad?.... Little Bro?...."
All I could think about was….
'I'm alone…'
The last piece of stone was lifted off of me as strong hands grabbed ahold of me, in my daze I could kind of recognize the man who was dragging my body up. It was one of my dad's friends, Beck Ernhardt.
Beck farms with his brother, they are both around my dad's age, but now that he's pulling me out, I remembered that he is also a volunteer firefighter.
How much time had passed since the explosion… I have no idea. I could barely see through the dirt and dust that clogged my eyes. I could hear a chorus of shouts and the sounds of multiple sirens wailing in different directions. As I walked, while, mostly assisted walk, out of the remains of the Pub I could see a crater where the explosion occurred.
And blood….
A lot of blood….
Bodies lay strewn around the street and sidewalks, most of them unrecognizable.
There were wounded as well, screaming for help and to make the pain stop. The blast didn't discriminate. Young and old, men and women, and even children lay on the concrete, begging for it all to go away.
In my daze I look for my parents, trying to find them, and when I look at the spot where I could vaguely remember seeing them last, I freeze in my tracks…
A shadowed outline and a pile of ash…..
That's all that remained of my family.
….
….
….
What I was feeling in that moment, was pain, fear, sorrow.... and most of all... pure and unbridled fucking rage….
My body shakes, and tears flood my eyes, washing away the dirt built up. Once I can see, I regain majority of the feeling in my legs.
By some miracle, being thrown by the shockwave, has only given me some minor cuts and scrapes, definitely a few bruises that will show up tomorrow. But, considering how close I was to the blast. It's almost like something was watching out for me. Who or what it is…. I have no idea….
But even now, I am grateful…. Because it gives me the opportunity….. to get revenge….
New World huh? I'll make damn sure that never… fucking…. happens…..
Beck had said something to me that I didn't hear, something lucky to be alive… or some shit along those lines. But I really didn't care. I noticed my dad's pickup that had been sitting out front was completely destroyed, the flames made quick work. I shook my head and turned to the tractor sitting nearby.
By another unlikely miracle, the tractor didn't appear to have any damage to it. I slowly walked to it, climbing the steps, opening the door to the cab and hopping into the seat. I shut the door, turning the ignition as the beast fired to life. I shifted and slowly began to take off.
At this point Beck had seen all of this happen. Instead of trying to stop me, he just directed the parked emergency vehicles to make enough room for me to pass. As I moved past him, he looked at me and held his hand up. I just gazed at him, moving past the blockade of flashing lights and driving back towards…..
Home…
I….
Is it even home anymore? Without…. Without them…. I don't even know.
Right now there's a mixture of a million things going through my head and absolutely nothing. Nothing, just a sea of black that flashes in the chaos, bringing an eerie silence to my head only broken by the noise of the engine.
I got off of the oil roads and started taking gravel back to the farm. It takes way longer….
But…
I look out the window and see the ground that my family has farmed forever.
Poe's, Kelly's, Bush's, McKee's, Wilson's…. Ground that my dad broke his back on, worked his life to give it to me and my brother…
But, they're gone now….
Gone….
My Dad, my brother, and my Mom…. All of them…. Gone.
I didn't even notice when the tears started flowing, and they didn't stop, not when I passed the next field, not when I pulled into the yard, went in the house… they didn't stop.
My sadness heard by no one other than the gods….
A trail of tears, left on an old, beat up road, passing fields that used to contain hope for a brighter future.
Now, they are only a swath cut through the earth, turned into fields of sorrow.
….
….
….
My sorrow….