Xie Bian and Fan Wujiu were escorted out of Chujiang's residence by Dongfang and Susu, who was particularly vicious towards Xie Bian. He kept dodging the snake's lunges, but that only made her more persistent. She didn't stop until he was well out of her line of sight.
Afterwards she returned to Chujiang's lap to coil around her middle and rest her diamond-shaped head on her ample bosom. She raised her snout in anticipation of receiving the scritches she loved so much.
Chujiang cooed at her. "Look at my little darling, so jealous. Did you bite him, uhm? I bet you tried."
Yanluo eyed the snake warily. He knew a hungry demon when he saw it. 'Darling' Susu was starving for spiritual energy, she was close to a breakthrough and would be able to reach a human form soon. If Chujiang wasn't careful she would become her pet's meal.
He swirled the tea around his cup. It had long gone cold, not that it made a difference. "I'm going to tell the others about Xie Bian, but it's a good thing he won't be here."
Chujiang kept petting Susu. "Qinquang is going to give you trouble. You know he's a stickler for the rules."
"He got over Fan Wujiu."
"It took him a decade."
"Time is all we have in here."
Chujiang gave him a petulant look from under the sweep of her curling lashes. "Don't be so sullen. We have fun here. Or would you still rather be in the Heavens? Don't think you'd have as much freedom up there."
"That's true," Yanluo said, rubbing his chin. He raised his eyes to meet Chujiang's with a smirk. "They're very particular about not interfering with mortal affairs."
"Which is only your favourite activity."
Yanluo sighed. "You're making me sound like a gossipy old aunt."
"I think it's endearing," she said, reaching out to pat his knee. "Now this Xie Bian...I'm very curious to see what he'll do. The things you told me about his mortal life..."
"He and Fan Wujiu have a score to settle. I'm happy to help," Yanluo said, all the while wondering if it wasn't too late for his help to do any good to anyone.
---
Xie Bian wasn't expecting it, but they really did leave right away. Fan Wujiu made one last stop and came out of a tailor's shop with an infinity pouch he threw at Xie Bian.
"Keep everything you need in there. Except your weapon. Always have that at the ready," Fan Wujiu said, walking quickly through the busy streets of Youdu. The oncoming crowd avoided him easily, sidestepping him as soon as they saw him approaching.
Even the most muddle-headed ghosts looked frightened to see him.
"Why does it look like you're the scariest thing down here?" Xie Bian said, amused by an imp that had fallen on its face in its hurry to avoid Fan Wujiu.
"Because I am."
Xie Bian rushed ahead of him just to give him a disbelieving look over the shoulder. "I'm terrified."
Fan Wujiu overtook him easily. "They'll fear you too. As soon as you learn to exorcise them."
That had Xie Bian's attention. "And when will I learn that?"
Fan Wujiu cast him a dismissive sideways glance. "When I find the time to teach you."
His tone conveyed his hopes that that time would never come, but Xie Bian wasn't willing to let the matter drop. "What do I need to do? I'm a fast learner."
"How do you know if you have no memories?"
"I can tell. I have a strong sense of self," Xie Bian said, keeping pace with Fan Wujiu's long strides.
Fan Wujiu turned towards Xie Bian with an inscrutable glint in his crimson eyes. Before he could process what was happening, he had a hand around his throat and his back against a wall.
"And what is your 'strong sense of self' telling you now?" Fan Wujiu asked, his warm breath ghosting over the side of Xie Bian's face.
Xie Bian dislodged Fan Wujiu's hand with an upwards sweep of his elbow. The hand was gone from his throat, but the sensation of a phantom touch remained.
"It's telling me that you're trying really hard to intimidate me." He glared at Fan Wujiu and smoothed down the front of his robes. "And I'm telling you it's not working."
"You're very arrogant. It makes you stupid," Fan Wujiu said. "You think being dead means you're invincible. You're wrong."
Xie Bian snorted. "What's worse than dead?"
"Gone."
Xie Bian paused, pondering Fan Wujiu's words.
"You can disappear entirely. Your existence can be erased," Fan Wujiu continued, "No strolls through Youdu's night markets, no trips to the human realm. You can be removed from the cycle of reincarnation as if you'd never existed at all."
"And you can do that?" Xie Bian asked, eyeing Fan Wujiu's lovely face warily.
"As easy as breathing."
"Have you?"
Something shifted in Fan Wujiu's gaze; he looked away from Xie Bian and put some distance between the two of them, stepping away from the wall.
"We're wasting time."
Despite Xie Bian's best attempts, he didn't get another word out of him until they reached a towering, dark, wooden gate.
They'd been walking for some time and Xie Bian hadn't noticed just how far away from the centre of Youdu they'd gotten. He could still see the impossible spires in the distance, and all the ghostly lights of the suspended red paper lanterns, but around here there was nothing but desolation.
The ground was dusty and grey and the air was still and empty of sound.
Fan Wujiu approached the gates and they opened for them, revealing sandy grey hills covered in bare, tortured trees. As far as the eye could see only a blanket of stars muffling the world.
It was only now that he was about to step out of the Underworld that Xie Bian understood what it meant to be dead.