Victoria held her breath, her heart pounding in her ears with her admission to Gabriel. He blinked at her uncomprehendingly.
"More than that?"
She nodded, her face hot despite the temperate air.
"What do you mean?"
"For goodness' sakes, Gabriel." She took a deep breath. "We're not children anymore, but you're being as dense as one right now. If I have to spell it out for you I will die of embarrassment right here in the street."
"Spell what out??" He asked, and she finally looked up at him.
His brow was furrowed, his eyes a mixture of pleading and frustration.
"Why I got my feelings hurt when you told me to stop caring about you. Why I don't care about scaring off suitors by spending too much time around you. Why I can't decide on my path in life! I've pretended to myself long enough that it was just sisterly affection, but it's high time I admit it's more than that."
Her little rant had cost her some pride, but she didn't care much about that. She was too focused on his reaction to her words. She watched as understanding slowly dawned in his eyes. She resisted the urge to drop her gaze. If he were going to reject her, she didn't want to be a coward about taking it.
Her direct words deserved a direct response, and she waited for several excruciating moments as he processed her words.
It gave her time to debate in her mind what reaction would be worst. Obviously, she knew what she wanted most, but didn't dare hope for it. If he loved her, his reaction would have been faster. Joyful. He certainly would have caught on what she was alluding to.
The longer he processed, the more she determined not to lose her nerve. She was tempted to flee, but he still held her wrist, albeit seemingly unconsciously at this point.
She watched his face, something she was very practiced at. Conflicted emotions warred across his expression. His eyes were unfocused, and she held her breath, afraid to disturb his thinking. An evening breeze blew a lock of dark hair across her face, and she didn't even lift a hand to push it back.
She was almost grateful for the partial veil it provided, giving her some shelter from scrutiny whenever Gabe finished his thoughts and looked at her once more. She decided that she dreaded his pity the most.
Piteous little orphan Vicky. The breeze picked up into a wind, unseasonably chilly, and she shivered involuntarily. The motion seemed to jolt Gabriel out of his stupor, and he dropped her wrist like a hot coal.
Her heart sank as he avoided her gaze. That was answer enough for her.
"I don't know what to say," He said awkwardly. "I'm sorry."
She closed her eyes, hoping the tear that escaped would be brushed away by the hair that whipped across her face.
"You don't need to be sorry. You haven't done anything wrong." Victoria almost resented her urge to be the one giving comfort in a situation where her heart lay breaking in front of her, but she couldn't find it in herself to be mad.
"That doesn't sound right at all." He frowned. "I must have."
"Can you stop that? Let's just get home." She turned and marched in that direction with him following. He didn't say another word, or try to touch her.
It would be nice, now when she was in turmoil, to take his hand like when they were children. But of course, such times of effortlessly being around each other were behind them now. She'd ruined it all by growing deeper feelings than she should have.
She brushed the hair from her face, using the gesture as a cover to also wipe the tears away before Dr. and Mrs. Sherman saw her. It would be terrible to show up on the doorstep after weeks away looking sad.
This was a happy time! She would be back with her adoptive family at last! She spoke to herself sternly about it all the way to the house so that her face would show the joy appropriate for the occasion.
She didn't glance back at Gabe, lest it ruin her efforts entirely.
In a hasty decision, she passed by the front door and went around to the side door into the clinic part of the house. Dr. Sherman wasn't quite as sensitive to emotions as Mrs. Sherman, and Victoria knew that once she was around her adoptive father, she would be cheered up enough to better hide her emotions from her mother… at least, for as long as Gabriel was around.
Raising her hand, she rapped firmly at the clinic door and lowered her voice to an unfamiliar timbre.
"Is this where weary travelers can find the doctor?" She called. Victoria felt Gabe's presence behind her, but didn't turn to see what he thought of her little joke.
"He's out, but he'll be back soon," A voice returned from within just as Mrs. Sherman opened the door. "Oh! Oh, my darling! My sweet girl!"
Mrs. Sherman wrapped her arms around Victoria tightly, and the young woman readily returned the embrace.
"And Gabriel! Our Gabriel!" One of Mrs. Sherman's arms snaked out to grab the young man's arm and pull him into the hug.
Victoria tensed as his arms came around the two women, and unfortunately, both of them seemed to notice. Gabriel stepped back with a nod towards Mrs. Sherman, and picked up the packs he and Victoria had put down.
"I'll take these inside." He said as the elder woman moved to usher them both in.
Victoria's lips pinched together. He could be so awkward when he didn't know what to do! Thankfully, Mrs. Sherman was readily able to cover the confusing behavior with a smile.
"Have you two eaten? Did you meet each other on the road?" She peppered them with questions.
"We have eaten, yes." Gabriel responded.
"Wait, you didn't tell her where you were going?" Victoria asked him at the same time.
Mrs. Sherman frowned. "He had a mission from the Council…"
"That involved searching for and finding Victoria and the rest of her traveling party," Gabriel winced. "I didn't want to worry you until I got her home to you, safely."
"That's a fine thing, to not be told our daughter is in danger!" Mrs. Sherman huffed.
"Victoria's in danger?" Dr. Sherman said from the doorway behind Victoria. The woman turned, and the old doctor's face softened from fear into relief. "Why, no she's not, she's right here."
He opened his arms, and the young woman rushed eagerly into them for a tight hug.
"Who would put my sweet girl in danger?" He asked Gabriel.
"Well, we were afraid of one kind of danger, but it turned out not to be a problem at all, but there were several other problems," Gabe grimaced.
Dr. Sherman opened his arms to look down into Victoria's face. She ducked her head slightly.
"I was kidnapped by bandits. And then sort of held captive by halflings. And then an enormous portal opened and giants came through, but none of that was very dangerous!" She finished lamely. "At least… I didn't get hurt."
Her adoptive parents gaped, and then Mrs. Sherman turned on Gabriel. "And you saved her?"
He shrugged. "Not really. I helped a little with convincing the halflings, but other than that…"
Mrs. Sherman went to hug the young man again.
"Thank you," She whispered, and Gabriel looked at Victoria over the woman's shoulder.
She looked away, unable to bear his gaze now that he'd implicitly rejected her. Victoria's heart was sore, as though it had been kicked, and every time he looked at her was as if it happened anew.
"I'm glad you're home," Dr. Sherman said from behind her. "It's been far too quiet without the two of you."
"It won't be for long," Victoria said suddenly, surprising them all. "I've decided what I want to do with my life, like you asked me to, Papa."
"Oh?" The older man's eyebrows rose with a mixture of concern and curiosity. "What's that?"
The decision was impulsive, but her own home felt oppressive with Gabriel in it. She needed to leave home, and soon. Preferably somewhere that she would never have to see his face again, never hear his voice and be reminded of the pain she was feeling now.
A plan had been forming in her mind since she came in the door, and once it left her mouth, she would find the courage to follow through. During their picnic dinner, the triplets had advised her and Gabriel of the snippets they'd overheard over the past weeks from their parents and visitors.
A Final Battle, danger in the South, the dispatched army… Victoria wanted to be helpful, and she wanted to leave to do it.
"I'll take my exams as soon as they can be arranged, and then I'm joining the military." Victoria replied resolutely.