Chereads / Pushing Back Darkness / Chapter 234 - The Night

Chapter 234 - The Night

Naomi was exhausted, as Caspian had guessed. She didn't realize that he was able to see through her so easily already. 

Not that she was out to deceive him whatsoever, but it was in her nature to downplay any of her own wishes. It seemed he had caught onto that habit. 

She suppressed a yawn, covering it with her free hand until she and Caspian were out of the sight of the wedding guests. 

"We should have left earlier," her husband repeated his earlier sentiment. 

"Not at all, I'm fine," She assured. "I would have been disappointed if we'd left before." 

"If you're sure," he looked at her skeptically. 

"I'm very sure." She sighed. 

She reveled in the easy way his arm was draped around her, and the way his muscles moved under her hand as it rested around his waist. Her heart went a little faster as it remembered the new dance they had done together. 

Her mind was wandering, and they walked in silence. The lowing of the cow made Caspian frown slightly in irritation. 

Her new calf had kicked the water trough over, and more would need to be poured out for them to drink. At least the water barrel was full, and could be used to do it. 

"I'll take care of it," Naomi volunteered. 

"No, you've done enough for today," Caspian said, releasing her shoulder to push her toward the house. "I'll deal with the animals." 

Smiling gratefully at her husband, she took him up on his offer. She headed inside, and noticed that the main room had been left in a bit of disarray due to their hurry to leave earlier. She decided to straighten up before getting ready for bed. 

Waking to a clean home was always happier than having extra chores first thing in the morning. She tied her loose hair back to keep it out of the way and got to work. She was just finishing up when she heard the door open behind her. 

She glanced over at Caspian's entrance and threw him a smile as she turned back to place the last dishes back on the shelf. He was looking at her with a strange expression. 

"Is the little one all right? He really is a beau--" 

Her sentence was cut off abruptly. In the space of her few words, he'd shut the door behind him, strode across the room, and had whirled her around. She found herself suddenly held closely in his embrace, as she had been at the dance. 

Her arms wound around his waist to return the hug. 

"I owe you another apology," He said. 

"For what?" She asked, utterly bewildered. What could he have possibly done wrong? 

"I... after Brenna and the mess with Edmar, I became suspicious of you. The way he's completely lost his reason in being besotted by her spell. And you were nice to her, and... the reasons for my suspicion don't matter. It was unfounded and unfair to you. Will you forgive me?" He pulled back to look her earnestly in the face as she blinked in further confusion. 

"You suspected me of what exactly?" She shook her head. "I don't understand. Of being friends with Brenna? I only knew her by reputation and didn't put it together while I was injured..." 

He grimaced, and Naomi tilted her head as she waited for his explanation. 

"I suspected you... of enchanting me, the way she did to Edmar." He said at last. 

"But... why?" She thought carefully over their interactions. He thought he was enchanted? 

"Because I convinced myself it was not possible to naturally have such strong feelings for you so quickly." He watched her face carefully. 

Naomi tried to keep her breathing even. This was a terribly roundabout way of confessing strong feelings, and she didn't know what to make of it. She turned the words over in her head several times as he stared at her. 

"Will you forgive me?" He asked at length. 

"For having strong feelings?" She'd lost her train of thought when he interrupted it. A hint of amusement touched his lips, drawing her attention. 

"No, for suspecting you of using evil magic herbs to make me love you." He answered. 

"Can you repeat that please?" Her voice sounded a little faint to her own ears. She'd watched his mouth as he said the words, but surely she hadn't heard correctly. 

"I love you," He said. "I know it's only been a short time since we met. I know this might sound mad. I wouldn't have thought it to be possible, but here I am." 

He smiled uncertainly, waiting for her response. Her stomach twisted into painful knots as she panicked internally. Love? So soon? Was it even possible? Why was it so terrifying? They were married, after all. 

"Can you know me well enough to love me?" She tensed, feeling shame over questioning her husband's declaration. He considered the question for several moments. 

"I think there will always be new things we learn about each other. I may never know you absolutely perfectly. I can only say that I love you as you are, and I cannot imagine learning something new about you that would make me stop." He reached up to brush away a strand of hair that had fallen across her face. 

Tucking it behind her ear, he cupped her cheek in his hand. 

"I don't expect anything from you, I just felt it unfair to conceal my feelings. Also, perhaps, impossible. I feel as if my heart might leap from my chest and into your hands if I didn't tell you." Caspian gave her a brief smile before moving to release Naomi from his arms. 

"I... I think..." She stuttered and looked at the floor. "That is, I believe I love you too." 

Her heart pounded at the admission. She knew that she meant it, but revealing it was so vulnerable, even after he said the words first. She felt as if the blood was draining from her head as her heart waited to be accepted or rejected. 

She was already promised to Caspian for the rest of her life, but now, he had the power to truly hurt her, if he chose. And he knew it. Yet, a calmness followed in the wake of the panic. She trusted him. He had laid down his life for her, saved her from death at nearly the cost of his own life. How could there be any risk in loving such a man who had demonstrated his love for her long before he'd spoken the words?

Still looking at the floor, she was a little startled when his finger came suddenly under her chin, tilting her face up to gaze directly into his. 

Caspian's gaze was intense, probing. 

"Do you mean that? You don't have to say it if it's not true. I'll wait forever for it to be true." His voice wavered a little through the last sentence. 

She bit her lip and nodded ever so slightly. 

His eyes dropped to her lip and she released it a little guiltily. Instead of chastising her, he slowly lowered his head. Carefully, gently, he kissed her with a question underneath the gesture: 

Is this a dream? 

She had the same problem in her own mind. This was too beautiful, too surreal, to be her life. Nothing close to this had happened to her before. 

His hand drifted from her chin to the back of her head, weaving into her hair. His other pressed the small of her back, coaxing her closer to him. Her eyes were closed, yet her vision exploded with color behind her eyelids as she reveled in the sensation of his lips as they moved against hers, his beard as it tickled her chin, his muscular shoulders and back as her hands drifted up to clasp behind his neck. 

She gasped for air as he drew back for a moment, trailing his lips along her cheek and up to her temple. He pulled her tight against him, and she could feel his heart beating as wildly as her own. 

"Is... is this real?" She whispered. "I'm not sure I believe it." 

"I'm having a little difficulty with that myself," He said in a husky tone. "But if it is a dream, let me stay in it." 

He tilted her head back and caught her lips again with his, more passionately now. It made Naomi's head spin. The kiss deepened and she gripped him as much for balance as in her ardor. Caspian held her body tightly against his, and yet it still didn't seem like close enough to satisfy either of them.

"I fear I'll faint," She managed to say as he took a ragged breath. 

"Then perhaps we should adjourn," He said, pulling away and taking a step back. She at once felt an immense loss at his withdrawal, but he continued speaking. "Naomi, my beloved wife, would you care to join me in our bedroom?" 

He held out his hand, and her mouth went completely dry with anxiety for a moment. She absorbed the significance of the question as she stared at the outstretched hand, and then looked up into his eyes. 

They were not demanding, nor hungry, nor lustful, nor any of the self-centered emotions she might have feared. They were gentle, and full of love. 

So she put her hand in his.