I became alert and I immediately headed back to my room to check on Kristina but instead of her, what lay on my bed instead was a pig. And before you doubt yourself for perhaps reading incorrectly, it was indeed a pig.
And no. Kristina Bilton didn't turn to one. She just disappeared somehow and for some reason, there was that thing on my bed.
I was thinking maybe she just left while I was taking a shit. Maybe an emergency came up. I wasn't sure. I was trying to be rational and not lose my head somehow.
But as seconds ticked by, I was getting more convinced that there was indeed an intruder in my house. And whoever that person was, he changed the picture in the hallway and brought an animal to my room.
Not that I understood the reasoning behind these actions but that was the only logical conclusion I could come up with.
I went to the kitchen, grabbed the butcher's knife, and I tried to look for the said intruder.
There was nothing worth stealing in my house aside from the smart TV my mom sent me. It was still in the living room so I became sure stealing was not the motive.
But as time went by, and after I foolishly searched my whole house, I found no signs of intrusions. So I sat on my sofa and dialed Kristina. I wanna ask why she suddenly left and to make sure she was safe.
It rang six times before she finally picked it up.
"Idiot, why'd you call this early?" She asked, her voice groggy.
"I'm sorry, okay? I'm sorry. But why'd you suddenly left? You could have told me, you know?"
"Left? What are you talking about?"
And trust me, I could only take so much confusion in a day. And I already had a month's worth of it.
"Look, Kristina. Maybe your head's not fully awake yet but don't you remember last night?" I asked her.
"Last night? Uh, Listen here, Danny boy. You should drink some coffee to sober up. You haven't called me for a week and you're suddenly calling me at three and asking me these—these random stuff. You really should lay off your alcohol addiction."
And this, my dear readers, was when I started to lose my shits.
"Ha? What are you talking about, Kristina? I don't drink." I told her. And I was telling the truth! I really don't drink. Or at least for the 'me' that I know of.
"C'mon, Dandie Gunnerman. Stop lying. You even posted on your timeline last night, drinking with a half-naked girl at the pub." Said Kristina.
"No. YOU stop lying, Kristina. You know I was with you last night. Look. We even did it, remember. You even told me to go harder, faster, and rougher. And my back stings right now with how deep you dug your nails. Don't you really remember or is this another weird kink of yours?"
She was silent for a while. One second. Two. Three.
"Now that's going over the line. Let's stop this. Hmm? And please don't call me for a while." Then she hung up.
I can't remember how long I held the phone by my ears. But there was only one thing that lingered in my head at that moment. I messed up. I messed up big time. I shouldn't have said that. I was wrong.
And it was then that I understood. I didn't know how it happened. But somehow, I was teleported to a parallel world. That there was no intruder in the first place. It was me. I was the culprit all along. The 'me' in this plane or dimension or whatever.
I didn't come to this conclusion just after the call. In fact, I already had my suspicions the moment I got out of the bathroom. I was trying to deny it at first but as I continued to roam around my house, I kept noticing tiny stuff, tiny details that demanded I wasn't in my place anymore.
The picture frame was one thing but the wallpapers were either a shade darker or lighter. Nobody knows my house more than I do so I'm sure I wasn't only seeing things. Well, maybe unless I have a disease that causes a disconnect between me and my memory which I don't!
That was why I concluded I was transported to a parallel world. Whatever caused this was a mystery to me but somehow, in this world or dimension, I was an alcoholic, I don't sleep with Kristina Bilton, and I have a pet pig.
As I was thinking this, a yellow light penetrated through the window of my living room and there was the sound of an engine turning off. And like the curiosity-driven person that I was, I peeked out by making the tiniest gap in the curtains. There was a green jimny car in my front yard.
Loads of emotions bubbled inside me. Confusion, fear, panic…
Then the jimny door swung open. A man, probably in his late thirties wearing a dark trench coat and a hat, got out of it and headed to my front door.
The man rang my doorbell. He rang it once again when I didn't open the door the first time. And as he waited, he took out a cigar from his side pocket, brought it to his lips and lit it.
"Dandie Gunnerman. I know who you are and what you did last night. Let me in before I report you to the police." Said the man in his deep, raspy voice after he puffed out smoke. "I know what's in your closet."
At this point, I was humoring him inside my head. Oh! D'you also know which position and how Kristina moaned then? How she kept screaming my name? But as I remembered… Shit! I'm in a different dimension.
My body moved faster than I could think of. I ran to my room. I ignored the pig sleeping soundly under the sheets and went to the closet.
And just when my fingers touched the knob handle, I stopped, I didn't wanna see whatever was behind those doors. But after I took a deep breath, I yanked it open, and I was greeted by a corpse.