After being deceived I was plunged into regret and anger, but even such a bitter sense of loss does not last forever. There's no telling how long it was before my deep rage subsided enough to allow me to think about anything other than tearing that bastard apart piece by piece without caring that he was in my body.
In reality, hell is very different from how one usually imagines it. Rather than being on a land full of flames and wailing cries... It's more like floating in space.
I mean that in this place there is really nothing but darkness, there is no floor, you cannot know which is up or which is down; it is an empty place plunged in darkness. For this reason, rather than saying that he was walking aimlessly, it would be more accurate to say that he was drifting.
I don't feel my body, it feels like I have no bones or meat at all; although if I try to touch the body that I have now, certainly some resistance and touch sensation is felt, beyond that, that wonderful sensation that you feel when you make an effort to move, it is not present.
The truth is that we have no idea of the pleasures that we are capable of feeling on a daily basis until we lose them.
That being said, there is nothing here, nor can you feel the passage of time; if you try to move, you certainly move, but to nowhere. This is hell; the real hell There is no way of knowing when I completely lost my mind and fell into complete madness.
Perhaps only thirty minutes passed or perhaps several centuries. Either way, there's no way to know for sure.
The only sure thing is that I kept moving forward while I still had any use of reason. Curiously, the only thing that reminded me that I was alive was that horrible feeling of hunger that plagued me constantly. Even torture can be satisfying at times, if nothing else it's a reminder that you're still alive.
I have several completely cloudy memories of meeting a creature or two at some point. Those creatures wanted to kill me, they were as crazy or even more crazy than me. I remember tearing them apart somehow and then I remember devouring their bodies as they screamed in agony in an attempt to assuage some of the uncontrollable hunger I felt.
At least hell wasn't as empty as he thought at first. At some point my only goal was to look for food; Just like everyone else who inhabits this place. It really is an eat or be eaten place; a place where there is no room for reason or thought; only for madness and slaughter.
Who knows how many creatures I killed over the years or how much time actually passed. From time to time you see these crystals from which you can see several worlds, it's almost as if all worlds and realities are connected to hell as a kind of door. Although as much as you wish, you will never be able to cross those doors.
With that as a base, all kinds of creatures end up in hell and are then condemned to wander for eternity devouring each other until their ego is completely lost and nothing remains but a wild beast with no trace of what we call humanity. This is really the demons. Actually, they are not very different from any animal.
In some ways it's a real punishment for someone who is consumed by regret and guilt. In reality, good and bad do not exist. It's not like you'll fall here because of your bad deeds. I know this because what we demons eat is not meat; it is repentance and guilt that permeates the soul. The deeper the regret, the tastier the prey.
For example, if you steal money from your parents and feel guilty about it or regret it enough, surely a demon will lick its lips to devour all that delicious guilt imbued in your soul. So if you don't want to deal with demons, all you have to do is make sure you don't do anything you might later regret.
Well now that I think about it. That's probably why people are so afraid of demons and call them evil; It's not really because they're a bad thing, they fear them because they instinctively know that demons are unforgiving and hungry. Even that bastard who cheated on me was probably drawn to that crystal guided by the guilt I felt for failing my family; because of the guilt I felt for slowly turning into scum just driven by desperation.
It's been so long that I can't even hate that creature anymore. It was when I found a small floating island not very big that I began to recover my reason. It is a beautiful place, it is like a small drifting meteorite in which there is a small cherry tree and an extremely small lake. The place is barely enough for one person and this place has become my home.
It is my personal little paradise located in the middle of hell. I have some recollection of defending it from unwanted visitors once or twice. I really didn't remember that I was strong enough to have torn all those creatures to pieces.
Most likely, that demon was somehow special. I mean, I haven't been here very long and I've never met a demon that was able to talk. As for why I regained the ability to think rationally, it's actually boringly simple.
All I did was just accept the blame...
It was never the devil's fault to deceive me; It was my fault for allowing it. The reality is that saying that a demon deceived me and that is why I abandoned my family in the hope that they would have a better life, is nothing more than an excuse that sounds nice.
The truth is that I was weak, I was tired of failing over and over again in my attempt to get out of the mousetrap that was my life. I did not abandon them because of another, I abandoned them because deep down it was what I really wanted; I wanted someone else to take the responsibility that was my responsibility.
That's how it is; the fault was always mine. I abandoned my family and instead of allowing nature to take its course fighting for a better life until my last breath, I gave up and left it to someone else out of cowardice. That's the truth, as cruel and painful as it sounds, you just have to accept reality for what it is and only then can you move on.
That demon didn't lie to me and now that I'm a demon at least I'm able to understand that my family didn't suffer or be in danger with a creature like that. I know this because only someone who has accepted reality has the right to keep their thoughts in this place. So I'm sure that demon kept his word and did what I should have done from the beginning.
So much time has passed by now that my family is most likely already dead. Although if I were allowed to fulfill one last whim, I would like to see them one more time so that I can apologize for my weakness and cowardice...
So I kept drifting resting on the branches of that tree while drifting, occasionally taking care of unwanted visitors arriving one after another. Actually, I stopped hunting demons for food a long time ago, now I just wait for them to come to me.
If they attack me I destroy them in the most painful and creative way I can think of, on the other hand, if they ignore me I let them go to return the kind gesture; Although this last has never happened, it would if it ever happened.
I mean, if you attack someone, then you can't complain if that someone tears you apart, right? That's how my life was until a certain day...
As usual I was leaning on one of the branches of that tree observing the vast darkness that surrounds me. Even if I wanted to do something more than this, the only thing that comes to my mind is swimming in that little lake and I really don't feel like doing such a thing too much. Mainly because what fills that lake doesn't even appear to be a lake with water, instead it looks more like a hole filled with some kind of bright cyan glowing energy.
"Wow, it's the first time I've seen such a peaceful demon in this place," a female voice resounded from somewhere. "Although I doubt a lesser demon can speak, it's still interesting to see one so peaceful," she said as if speaking to herself. It was evident that she did not expect any kind of response from me.
"And who the hell are you?" - I responded with annoyance to who disturbed my rest. Although it is also true that somehow I am curious to see a demon that is able to speak after so long.
When listening to me, what before seemed to be some kind of shadow that was confused in the void, took on a human form. She is a really beautiful short woman, her unruly hair is orange and it matches her eyes of the same tone and her sharp gaze. She has a rather slim, slender figure and watches me in a curious yet playful way.
"Uhm… you are a lesser devil, right? How come you can talk? —She questioned after approaching the base of the tree and looking at the branch I'm on from below.
"Even if you ask me… what am I supposed to answer?
"Now that you mention it, you're probably a young devil who just woke up," she said with visible disappointment. "Now I feel like a fool for thinking that was a rarity...
-Wake up? —Your comment about him took me a little out of place, because I would think that I have been awake for quite some time; in theory at least.
"Ah… well, you see, when one of the corrupted souls that falls here finally accepts the blame for all their actions, they usually regain the ability to think. Although this is not something common to see in a lesser devil, you know? —Well, the truth is that it is something quite simple to suppose anyway. However, it's a good thing that I can confirm this theory with someone else.
"Is that so?" I guess somehow I knew. So tell me, will you also attack me like everyone else or will you leave quietly?
"Hahahaha, don't be pushy kid, why would an ancient devil like me bother to play with a wretched sprout like you?" Honestly the spiritual concentration a lesser devil has isn't even worth the effort, you know?
"If you say so... I'll take that as a sign of an unspoken ceasefire, in that case." It's not like I've talked to her much, but it's true that I have some questions and she seems like a good source of information. In that case, can I ask your name and how long have you been living in this place?
"If you promise not to run away, I'll tell you my name," she proposed flirtatiously.
"It's not like I'm afraid of you, you know? I would say that you transmit more curiosity to me than anything else.
"Uhm… a brave bud, huh. Well my name is Misery.
"What a strange name… That being said, I guess it's a fitting name for a devil.
—Ah, if you keep flattering me you'll make me blush, couldn't it be that you ended up in hell for going around like a pica flower?
-Who knows? —I told him with a smile devoid of any emotion —Besides, he wasn't a compliment...
"My, what a cruel little creature." Regarding your other question, it is difficult to answer that in a place where time does not exist.
-What are you talking about?
"Well, in hell, the future, the past, and the present all happen at the same time. Basically, time does not pass here, perhaps another way of looking at it would be that all time passes at the same time in this place.
"That's kind of hard to understand, I guess." Or rather, your explanation is a bit confusing. Either way, if time can't be measured, how do you know you're an ancient devil?
—I did not say that time cannot be measured, it is just that it is different for each individual. For example, creatures that come from different planets or dimensions will not have the same way of measuring time. I mean that if the orbit of the planet from which they come is longer or shorter, the duration of days and hours for each one is different. Although, there are some demons that measure time based on the creatures they kill and count each kill as one day.
-I see. That makes sense.
"You won't doubt my words?"
"Well, someone told me that demons haven't been used to lying for a long time."
—Hahaha, and here I was thinking of tormenting you a bit. It really is a shame that person gave you a spoiler like that, hehehe. To all this, what is your name?
—Uhm… I don't know the reason, but I can't remember it…
"Hey, does that mean that instead of coming to your senses after being summoned and given a name, you did it on your own?"
"If your question is, have I ever been out of here, the answer would be that I never had a chance to get out."
"Uh...really?" There is no way…
-It's so weird?
"Most of the thinking devils I know of came to their senses like that, there are exceptions like me who directly came here with their body and eventually turned into a devil, but this is the first time I've heard of someone having come to their senses after accepting all the cupa that houses his soul… In fact, maybe that is why you are so apathetic and indifferent.
-Because? I mean, all you have to do is willingly accept the blame and pay for it, right? I don't see the complication...
"Even if you say it like that, doing that isn't as simple as you're making it out to be, little sprout." Until now we hadn't really moved much from our initial positions except when she began to suspect my words. At that moment his curious gaze lit up literally it is the only light that is seen in a vacuum and then he said the word: [Analysis] shortly after his face distorted in bewilderment —Uhm… because of your spiritual energy it is definitely a lesser devil…. Let's see, let's see her type… Hey! Punishment demon? This is the first time I've seen this kind of demon…" She seemed to be thinking of something while looking at me curiously, apart from the word [Analysis] I didn't hear her say anything else before seeing her immersed in her thoughts.
-Something wrong?
"N-no... do you happen to know how many types devils are divided into?"
"No, I don't know anything about it.
—Until now I thought there were only two classes: Devouring Demon and Noble Demon. The function of the devourers is like their name to devour every creature that enters hell and their intelligence is not usually their strong point, then there are noble demons like me. A class of demon capable of commanding others weaker that by nature is indifferent and selfish. That being said, most high-ranking devils belong to this type. However, you are a punishing demon… he had heard stories about it, but thought they were just myths and such.
"And what are these demons doing?"
"W-well, in theory their only peculiarity is that they are neutral devils. That is, they are not chaotic or evil like the others, so the sacred energy does not affect them. However, he thought it was a myth… Furthermore, they are supposed to be best suited to purify souls with a punishment accordingly.
"Purify souls?"
—Well, I'm surprised you haven't noticed, but the demon that devours another's soul stores it in his body. It is the winner's responsibility to purify the loser's soul through suffering so that he can return to the great cycle of reincarnation as a pure soul.
"That sounds like a really heavy job without pay..."
"It's not like there's no compensation. In exchange for purifying the soul, you can obtain its spiritual energy, which will be stored in your body. In other words, this is how we demons get stronger.
-I see.
"However, with your energy level I don't think I ever have, have I?" I guess it's a good way to pass the time to give yourself a little lesson," he said before hopping to the branch I'm leaning on. "Since you're still one less demon you should only have a thousand or two thousand souls to take care of.
-What are you doing? I complained because she suddenly put her hand on my chest.
"Don't worry, I just want to know how many souls you've stored up to now..." Ignoring my discomfort, she continued on and then fell completely silent, "...this can't be..." she said in disbelief.
-Something wrong?
"Let me ask you one thing, how many creatures have you killed so far?"
—Uhm…. How many will they be, I think since I can remember, about 100 maximum.
-Yeah? And why do you have three million souls stored in your body? She said suspiciously.
-What did you say? F-fifteen million! —even I was surprised —There is no way…
"Your reaction doesn't sound like you're lying, so I'm guessing that in your time as a devouring demon you were quite a gluttonous creature." What impresses me the most is that you could find all those creatures in a place like this, so your innate perception must be really good huh.
"Innate perception?"
—Yes, as you have realized in hell there is nothing like sound, light or even something that stimulates one of your senses, which is why most of the creatures that enter here lose their sanity in a short time. For example, someone who needs to breathe will desperately try to do so after arriving here, but that pleasure will be denied, as well as many other pleasures that you are not aware of until you live here long enough. That being said, most higher beings develop new senses in order to live here. Some have an exorbitant spiritual perception like you and can give an imaginary shape to a world that in principle has no color or shape,
"So that's why I was able to distinguish things from one moment to the next, huh.
"Well, regarding what I mentioned before, all you have to do is search within yourself, choose one of those souls, and torture it in many ways until its soul is eventually purified. It is true that it is a somewhat long process, but it is really satisfying. Since you have so many souls, when you finish purifying all of them you will probably become an ancient devil or maybe even an ancient devil.
I guess I can try...
"Well, I'll leave you a present before I go."
—Why would you leave a gift?
"Because you're a pretty nice little sprout." In fact, it's quite amazing that I didn't feel any kind of hostility from your side and I think I can give you a gift for that, plus I plan to come back every once in a while, you know?
"W-well, whatever you say…
—I like guys who are honest —he said before opening a kind of reddish portal from which several crystals of those that can be found occasionally in hell came out —These are almari crystals that can only be found in hell. Regarding what they are for, these crystals allow you to see other realities and times, obviously depending on where the portal is connected, you will be able to see other worlds through it and learn many things.
After saying that, she left a lot of those Almaria crystals lying around and then went somewhere. After getting annoyed because this felt like a visitor came to your house and took a large amount of rubbish out of his bag to carelessly dump it around... I had to get down from the branch where I usually rest to tidy up the place a bit. .
Various things can be seen in the crystals, some kind of university somewhere, a war zone, even a fantastic elven village that looks like something out of a fantasy tale. These crystals are not very different from watching television and changing the channel.
Anyway, now he had a source of entertainment and an activity. On the one hand, he had to purify three million souls by making them suffer…a task he would prefer not to do too regularly. On the other hand. I had the different crystals that Misery left which would serve me to entertain myself and learn all kinds of things.
So I followed that routine for a long time, thanks to the crystals it was possible to measure time, since in it you could see time go by and since they showed a place similar to an earth in the future, I decided to measure the days with that crystal. So about two thousand years went by, Misery introduced me to some people when he came occasionally and we had a problem or two in that time. She insisted that she should learn to take my real form, but since she didn't know what this body looked like originally that was impossible for me, so she just ignored her.
This was my pleasant time in hell, until one day when I was sleeping on one of the branches of the tree as was my custom, I suddenly saw one of those crystals shine.
I was kind of curious, because I thought that world had ended or the bridge had been destroyed. Whatever the case, it was the first time I had seen something like this and I approached the glass curiously, but I was naive. The next thing I know, the crystal sucked me in like a vacuum cleaner and I ended up in a daze right in front of a strange girl looking at me with fear and suspicion.
Although I didn't know how it happened, I somehow sensed that someone had finally summoned me. However it would be a simple matter of fulfilling his request and then killing my invoked in a painful manner. Then wander for a bit until the energy that sustains the existence of my body runs out and return to hell.
Either way, it's not like I feel any appreciation or empathy towards my summoner. The course of action was decided, although depending on what she asked of me I could just kill her and then fulfill her request. Unfortunately the last part was not negotiable.
Thus I prepared myself to interact with my inexperienced summoner, completely unaware that fate had started to turn with my arrival in this place.
And it is with her that this story really begins, although I hate to admit it. And that's because this woman is...