My restless body was lifted by the unknown man in the room, we were alone, his skin on mine, our bodies both naked.
This night felt way longer than other nights, it felt like an eternity. I was feeling a bit sick, maybe because I had gotten a fever the night before.
I suddenly felt the urge to puke on the spot,
I was strong enough to hold it in, but the feeling of dizziness came to me, and my nausea was kicking in.
I had been using pills. I guess they have stopped working.
I still held it all in, and as that man thrusted inside me I could only moan with pleasure, as long as I acted as If I was taking pleasure in everything would go fine.
It hadn't been long before we both came, it was finally time to end.
As I was left there unaided and worn out, the unknown man departed, I saw the door open and then close along with my eyes shutting.
My eyes opened, and I was laying on the cold wet floor, I curled up like a ball.
I remember Father had hit me until I fell asleep, I was bruised everywhere.
My poor self couldn't help but just lay on the floor alone,
I was an only child. My mother was the only one I could rely on, she was the sweetest person you could ever meet, with her dark black hair with her gorgeous crystal eyes, she was always delighted out in the open,
but it was a different story at home.
Father hit us both, he was acrimonious and absurd. He'd come home drunk constantly complaining about how he could have won games at gambling with his unknown friends.
Father rarely let us see the outside world. He was addicted to gambling, he made us lose our homes and almost live out on the street because of his addiction, and we couldn't benefit from it. He was way stronger than both of us.
I was only five at that time, and I was helpless, but my mother always comforted me when my Father was not around, Father would sometimes hit Mother with his booze bottles, He would lock me up in the cabinet and hit Mother, he would harass her, I could hear everything from outside the cabinet, my poor small feet were constantly trembling, my hands gripping onto my pants.
I really couldn't do anything, only wait for my father to leave. I would go hug my mother, I wish she would have stayed longer with me…It was fathers fault she left me alone.
One day she disappeared. Mother had left through the window Father had left unlocked by accident the previous day. Father locked all the windows and doors.
The day she left she said she would come back to save me and get me out of this agony place…I waited for her..but she never came back,
Father came back in disbelief at what Mother had dared to do.
He sent all the things from the counter and hit me with all of them. He hit me until I was left laying down helplessly without a movement of my poor little body.
he left me there and took off leaving me lonely.
it became his everyday habit to do so,
he was a heartless bastard with no fucking heart, his poor fucking child left alone each evening left in starvation and despair,
I sometimes wish I had died one of those nights.
When my mother left I had just begun school, I have always favored being in school to at home,
The school was a place where I was secure from my father. My mother had taken me on my first eight days of school but on my ninth, she was already gone…although I felt good being at school…mother not bringing me here felt distinct, I got used to it as time went on.
I was already halfway through school when I met him,
The rowdy kid that wasn't in my class, I had encountered him while at lunch, he sat way across from me, and we all were assigned seating charts. I had guessed he had been moved since he was a troublemaker.
I was assigned all alone at one table while my other classmates were at the other one. It Wasn't so bad since my friend was right behind me.
After he moved across from me he would shout at me and call me names and toss food, and the teacher would scold him for doing so, it was until one day he came up to me and hit my back, that was when I took action and whacked him across the face,
I then started to laugh at his entirely flustered and mad look and we ended up hitting each other until a teacher broke us apart and we were sent to the front office where the teacher scolded us and hit both our heads, I used to be very sensitive since Father hit me all the time so, of course, I shed into tears and I sobbed more after they told me they would have to call my guardians.
I remember they told me if I knew his number and of course, I didn't,
They called him several times and he didn't
pick up.
Father didn't care about me…He wouldn't even notice If I passed one day.
After that day that irritating kid kept troubling me, he tripped me while I was strolling in the halls and when I was waiting for my tray of food to be served he used to shove me and make me bump into my friend who bumped into the person in front of him.
My friend one day asked me If I was friends with that annoying kid, and that's when I learned his name. It was Gim Zubin,
that annoying brat.
My friend Kil Yunseo told me I shouldn't get near to him because he was a bad kid and mean to others. I didn't like rude people back then, I abhorred them all including my heartless father.
That's when I began ignoring him but he just kept and kept bugging me.
With all his nuisance I had to talk to him and hit him more. I'm afraid I learned all that from my father, I didn't suppose that when it was occurring.
My friend hated Zubin as much as I did.
We soon moved to the second year of school. I was excited I got new teachers despite all the suffering at home I still held on time with my tiny hand to life.
And to my amazement, I got put with that reckless attention seeker Zubin, but it was fine as long as I was in the same class as my friend, that school year was full of chaos.
I met four more friends but they were not important since they all turned a blind eye to me the next school year, except for Yunseo, Yunseo stayed with me even when I stopped being the happy little kid in the third year of school, he was the only one I spoke to.
Zubin also quit bothering me, but he soon turned into the popular kid, for 2 years straight before he moved schools and I never saw him ever again.
As for Yunseo, he was still there by my side. I liked Yunseo very much.
He was sweet-hearted and he had good grades, I admired him very much.
To spend more time away from home we used to go to the convenience store and he would get me snacks since I had no money.
His father provided him with money each week. He told me he didn't mind sharing with his promising friend, he was the best friend.
Yunseo learned what was happening to me at home when I told him a very long time ago,
He hugged me tightly every day we parted ways back home, he knew I would get home and get hit to death by my father, but I told him to not tell anyone else, he had kept his word since then.
I thought highly of him…
Even to this day…you read that right, Yunseo is still by my side to this day, he works downstairs in the bar, and he serves customers with a full heart. He's still that sweet boy for elementary school, and I work on the second floor, the horny floor.
Where men touch me all over the place with satisfaction in their gazes, as they stroke their bodies onto mine and do as they please, How I love when they exploit the toys and pleasure me like a human dog or when they toss cash on my stripped body and let me keep it all.
That's the only reason I do it…Money is the key to life. It saved me from my father. As a prostitute, I should keep my image and act like a useless rag that is used and thrown to the side afterward.
I would still prefer doing this job rather than being with my heartless father, that's how terrible of a father he was.
I never found out what and where my mother ran off to. I just knew that I was already a seventeen-year-old senior with no life as a prostitute, although I earned money from it I was a useless piece of shit.
Yunseo gave me advice about life all our school year life, I listened but nothing worked out.
It was my fate to do this as a career,
I uttered to myself while getting up and suddenly felt
a sense of throbbing in my back
"Fuck why is it like this"
I rose from the bed bearing the discomfort in my back while clasping it with my right hand, dammit it was a clutter again. No matter how much I tidied up after each client I had,
the whole room would become a mess in the blink of an eye.
"These damn perverts can't control themselves at times like this shouldn't they be the ones cleaning"
I shrugged and began to pick up the used condoms and playthings that were flung on the ground,
As I started to clean, my nausea was coming back. This time it was painful. I put my palm over my mouth and squeezed it hard.
I felt vomit arriving from my throat the burning sensation came up from my throat and it all went up to my mouth, I couldn't keep it in any longer I stood up and sprinted out of the room and I went directly to the washroom still clasping my mouth with my palm, I threw up in the toilet and sat there waiting for more to come out.
How I hated this uneasy feeling I felt in my head.
I began to feel unsteady and unexpectedly fell on my side straight to the ground,
I guess it occurs to every individual who sells their body to random outsiders to touch.
I tightly held onto my shirt, damn it was giving me flashbacks.
The uneasy feeling went away after a while of sitting there with my knees on the ground.
I quickly got up and rinsed my face with water on the sink, I still tasted the bitter with the mix of sourness of the vomit in my mouth, I then also rinsed my mouth out with water.
When I looked up in the mirror I saw that my eyes were red, fuck I hate this…