(Goblin POV)
BANG!
A sharp pain spread throughout my face.
''It was just a prank bro!''
I shouted while looking at a muscular goblin in front of me, who was currently positioned in a fighting stance.
''How was that a prank?! You just jumped out of nowhere and made some weird noise!''
The muscular goblin shouted back.
''Tch! Whatever!''
I replied and frantically ran away from him.
'This is harder than I thought and I don't even know if I am making any progress..'
I have been trying out different scaring methods all around the village, but they haven't been very effective.
Right now my strategy involves hiding in some corner, waiting for someone to come near me and then jumping out while letting out a loud roar.
This method does spook a lot of people, but only momentarily.
Afterwards, It usually ends in me getting hurt somehow.
I either get punched, slapped or something thrown at me. One time I even nearly got stabbed with a spear.
''Sigh! I guess I should try to find some other method of scaring people..''
I decided to go back to my home and smoke some Glitterleaf to get some inspiration, but as soon as I entered my door..
{You are making great progress my disciple, if you keep up this pace you will become the leader of goblins in no time}
A text made up of blood was splattered on my wall.
''M-Mr. Goblin God! I will not disappoint you!''
The bad mood I was in due to getting punched in my face quickly disappeared and was replaced by excitement.
The blood changed its shape and revealed another sentence.
{But remember, in order to become a great leader you also need great underlings}
''Y-yes, Sir Goblin God, I understand.''
''I haven't forgotten that part from the first interaction I had with you, it's just very hard to find goblins that want to follow me…''
I said in a low voice.
{Worry not my disciple, Rome was also not built in a day}
'Rome? What's that?'
I wondered, but didn't dare to question the knowledge of his holiness.
''Yes Sir! I shall find some followers soon!''
After that, the blood on my wall quickly disappeared, like it was never there to begin with.
Although I was very inspired, I was also very sleepy. So I decided to call it a day and invest all of my energy into tomorrow.
I laid in my bed, rolled up another Glitterleaf joint and fell into dreamland…
///
A new day had come and I was as energetic as I could be. I had finally made up a reasonable plan to gain followers and ran out of my door.
Currently, I was walking around the streets of the village with a pouch hanging from my belt.
Inside it were my life savings, 34 gold coins. I was actually considered quite wealthy in the goblin world, that was also why I didn't have to work and could spend my whole day doing things I like.
Usually, it would be quite dangerous to walk around with a pouch full of gold in this town, but I had no other choice.
After walking for a little bit I had made it to my destination, the Goblin Adventurers Guild.
It was a large and beautiful building that stood out from the dirty and crooked houses of this village.
I went inside and headed straight to the counter, where I was greeted by a stunning young goblin girl.
''How can I help you sir?''
The girl asked enthusiastically.
''I'm here to put in a request.''
I answered with a grin.
''Alright, please tell me what you want done and how much you are willing to pay for it.''
The girl said with a smile.
''I am looking for bodyguards to accompany me on a week-long trip to the forest, which starts tomorrow. I'm willing to give each participant 2 silver coins each.''
''T-Two silver coins per person? I'm sorry sir, put we have to make sure tha-''
Thud!
I placed my gold filled pouch on the countertop.
''Your request has been put up on the board!''
The girl said with a blinding smile.
After that I left the Guild building and went to do my daily task of scaring people.
I hid in some dark corner and waited..
After a while, I heard a pair of steps coming towards my location.
The steps were getting louder and louder until they were right next to my hiding spot.
I glanced at my next targets..
They were 2 scary looking goblins, one tall and one short.
'Crap, these guys look like Goblin gangsters..'
I hesitated if I should scare them or not, but in the end..
'Well, what's the worst that can happen?'
I jumped out of the dark corner.
''Meow!''
And let out a terrifying roar.
''Oh! What the hell!''
The shorter man shouted as he took a few steps back and pulled something out from his back.
'Uh oh!'
I froze while realizing what the thing he pulled out was.
It was a bow!
The short goblin drew his bow and pointed the arrow at my face.
''NO, wait stop, I was just joking!''
I shouted and let out a nervous laughter.
Luckily, the goblin loosened his bow, but was still looking at me with furrowed brows.
''Seriously man! Not cool, I hate cats!''
'Cats?'
I was confused as to what he meant, but was relieved that he hadn't shot me.
'Imagine how embarrassing it would be to die like that…'
After a while of throwing insults at me the pair finally left me alone.
After the situation ended I decided to call it a day.
I went back to my home, opened the door and was once again greeted by a wall of blood..
///
(The next day)
I woke up and heard something from outside my house.
I went up to investigate and my mouth fell open..
'Holy crap! Why are there so many of them..'
I thought while looking at a massive amount of goblins standing in my front lawn.
There were around 60 goblins fully equipped with weapons and armor chatting with each other.
'I know I deposited 34 gold, but I didn't expect so many adventurers to show up..'
I was still shocked at what I was seeing, but quickly calmed myself with my trusty Glitterleaf joint.
'Oh well, the more the merrier, I guess.'
I loudly cleared my throat, gaining the attention of everyone present.
''Greetings everyone! I am your employer, I hope you guys will take good care of me.''
I loudly announced and started walking to the front of the crowd.
Once I reached the very front, a large goblin equipped with a shiny red sword greeted me.
''Hello sir! I am Thornboots, but you can just call me Thorn. I am the highest ranking adventurer here so I am naturally in charge of all these rookies.''
''Nice to meet you, we will head out as soon as possible.''
Thor nodded his head and smiled at me.
''As you wish sir!''
Soon enough the whole caravan started moving towards the forest.
After 2 hours of travel, I decided that we were far enough from the village and stopped the caravan.
''Sir! May I ask you why we have stopped? Have we perhaps reached our destination?''
Thorn asked with a confused face.
''Actually, I have an announcement to make to everyone here.''
I answered in a slightly nervous tone, garnering everyone's attention.
I took a deep breath and once again opened my mouth, this time with a loud and confident tone.
''I am sure that the reason everyone here accepted my request was due to them being in a dire need of money.''
A few of the goblins nodded their heads, while the rest of them had confused faces on.
''But what if I'd tell you that I know a way for every single one of you to not worry about money for the rest of your lives ever again?''
The word ''money'' gained every goblin's attention.
''But before I tell you about the way to achieve that, I want to introduce you to someone..''
Everyone had a curious face on and were patiently waiting for something to happen.
I made my voice even louder and said with a majestic tone.
''Let me introduce you to the savior of our children, the hero of our kin, the leader of all goblins...''
A loud rumble echoed throughout the forest as I was giving my speech.
The air next to me warped strangely and something similar to a massive portal appeared.
The goblin caravan was looking at the portal with confusion and also a bit of uneasiness.
After a few moments of eerie silence, something appeared out of the portal.
A colossal green hand holding a massive black spear.
The spectators were shocked at the sight in front of them, thinking about the gigantic body that the hand would belong to.
Slowly the actual body of the mysterious green beast emerged from the portal and everyone could see what it was clearly.
''I-it's a goblin!''
One of the spectators managed to spit out, while the rest were frozen in one place.
A grin appeared on my face as I opened my mouth once again.
"Ladies and gentleman, let me introduce you to the God of Goblins!''
After my introduction was done, every goblin's heart seemed to skip a beat.
After a moment of silence, that felt like an hour in everyone's head, one of the goblins made a move. It was Thorn.
He lowered his body onto one knee, placed his hand over his heart and let out a loud shout.
''I welcome the Goblin God!''
Soon after, another goblin followed Thorn's actions and also showed his respect to the great one.
And in a few moments, the whole caravan of 60 goblins knelt down in front of the giant goblin standing in front of them.
''We welcome the Goblin God!''
All of them shouted in unison.
Phew!
I let out a sigh of relief and looked at the giant god in front of me.
'To see a bunch of goblins respecting something that is not money is a beautiful sight.'
I thought while looking at the spectacle in front of me.
I cleared my throat once again.
''The Great One accepts your welcome and tells me that all of you are worthy of becoming his avatars.''
''Tell me! Will you follow his holiness to the ends of this world?''
''YES!''
Every goblin shouted at once, while pounding their chest with a fist.
'Sheesh, this went way smoother than I thought it would.'
I grinned while admiring the massive goblin crowd.