Trigger Warning: Rape & Violence

"Mama! Mama nooooo!"

Lying in a pool of blood, I thrashed and screamed to move next to my mama.

So much blood. There was so much blood. I did not know if it was mine or my mama's.

I slowly whimpered. They are going to take my mama away!

"Papa! Papa save mama. They are taking her away." I looked at my papa and willed him to check on mama. He laid face flat on the floor, his head bent at an odd angle.

I tried moving towards my papa, when a shrill shout rang through the room. I looked up to see a man standing in front of my mama. She was gagging and crying while her head bobbed up and down in front of his pants. What were they doing? Why was mama crying? If papa did not save her, I had to.

I was my mama's brave girl. She always told me that.

"No! Leave my mama alone! You monsters. I will kill you!"

The movements stopped. The man holding my mama's head turned around slowly.

I gasped. His entire face was marred with scars. And his eyes felt so scary.

Suddenly, he throws my mama to the floor and starts to strut towards me. His pace that of a panther following his prey. I started to drag myself backwards despite the pain in my left leg. I whimpered again.

My mama suddenly shot forward to hold his legs.

"Please, please not my baby girl. She is only 6....take me, kill me, do whatever you want. Not my daughter. Please not my daughter. It's not her fault." She cried profusely.

Her eyes connected with me from between his legs. I don't know what I saw there, but her pain and helplessness were evident. She mouthed to me to close my eyes. So I did, I was my mama's girl. I always listened to her.

There was a loud ripping sound, like something was torn off. I squeezed my eyes shut.

"Sing my baby girl, sing, mama loves you.... " She chocked.

Five minutes later a gunshot went out. I opened my eyes and screamed in horror.

Where there was supposed to be my mama, was half of her face, with other half spread all over the floor blown to smithereens.

I look up. And run.
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The Past: 22 Years Ago (Ivan)

Trigger Warning: Trauma

I reluctantly moved towards the door. My hand rested on the lock and hesitation lined my body.

Another moan, and then a raspy cough behind me quickly changed my mind.

I opened the door and started walking towards my father's office. He always insisted we call him father.

In my mind and eyes, he was a monster. A monster who was slowly killing my mother and a monster who did not care about his only dying daughter.

All he ever cared about was me. Not as his son,no never that. All I ever was to him was his heir.

The next Bratva leader.

My fists clench and I make a conscious move not to look angry. My sister wants to see him. And she did not have much time. I could not fuc* this up.

Joanna at most had probably a few hours left. My fists clench again and my lips press up. I was about to lose the one family member who loved me.

My mother was a mentally broken drug addict. And my father a monster.

He was a Bratva leader through and through. He was even one at home.

Once Joanna is gone, all that would be left of us would be broken.

Lost in thoughts, I reach my father's office and knock twice.

Immediately he barks, "Who the fuc* is this?"

His tone was agitated. He seemed pissed about something. I sigh internally. He would probably beat me to an inch of my life if I said what I came to say.

It's for Joanna. You have to do it for her.

I slowly but confidently slide inside the office. Because no matter how much he hit me, he would never kill me. I was his ticket to his family name staying at the top in Bratva.

Before I can open my mouth. His phone rings. The shrill sound of the landline has his full attention.

Finally, he picks up the phone.

"What do you mean you can't find her?" My father shouts through the mic.

"She is a six year old child for fuc*s sake! Are you all good for nothing? I want her within the next 48 hrs, or I will kill all of you one by one. And make it extremely painful."

He slams the phone down so hard that it almost breaks. My mind instantly turns curious.

Seems like my father was having issues with a girl child. Impressive. And satisfying. The bastard deserved to be cut.

He suddenly looks up at me like he could hear what I was thinking. I looked him in the eyes with challenge. Yes, I was only 12, but I would never back down from my father.

He sneers, all his scars scrunching up.

"What do you want boy?" He asks in an uninterested manner while looking at the papers on his desk. "I am busy."

"She won't make it past a few more hours... " I slowly start. "She wants to see you one last time."

A plead almost on my tongue, I stop myself. He would never meet her if I pleaded. He would "teach" me the lesson of how leaders never pleaded.

He stops. And finally looks up at me.

"I am busy. "

That's all. That's it. I knew it, he wouldn't agree. But rembering Joanna's face. I tried once more, this time with a deal I knew he couldn't refuse.

"If you give her the goodbye she deserves, I will start my first assignment tomorrow."

I had adamantly refused to join the Bratva. No amount of beating or torture could make me agree.

My father looks up with curiousity.

He gets up from the table, looks at me.

A wicked glint enters his eyes.

Looking me in the eyes, he says, "You will ra*e, tort*re, and k*ll the girl I bring you tomorrow. She's 6 and you can't refuse." There is a steely glint in his eyes.

For Joanna. This is all for Joanna. Tomorrow she will die and I could run away from the house. Agree for now.

Swallowing the bile and vomit, I nod my ahead.

My father starts to walk out and up the stairs to Joanna's room.

I follow him silently. All the way praying that they never find the girl.

For her, and my sake.

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