As he pondered so, it had suddenly occurred to him, there was indeed one place Luke knew they would keep away from and although he had heard of how ominous it was, that was not very convincing coming from his assailants, for all he knew that story could have been made up to keep him from escaping into a place their religion forbids them from stepping into.
The ruined buildings and the surrounding debris painted the picture of a place long forgotten, and although he had dismissed the story as mere superstition, he could hardly say the same words now, when every shadow felt like it could jump at him at a moment's notice. Luke had weapons and skills specialized in dealing with most of anything, yet he couldn't feel at ease here. No matter how skilled one became, the unknown could always best them. To accept the fear of that unknown is to be human. As such thoughts raced through his mind, Luke stared wistfully at the ethereal full moon, now directly overhead, wrapping the ruined town in a radiant embrace, midnight was already upon him.
"..."
He pulled out his knives and took his fighting stance. A sort of shuffling sound came from the ruined storefront around the corner. Peering around, he happened upon the silhouette of someone with some kind of sword in one hand, probably one of the townsfolk trying to find him, he thought. They wouldn't let him go that easily after all. It could spell trouble if he was noticed and the man warned the others, with that thought Luke rushed to the man with his blades drawn, and formed arcs with the butt of the knives, intending to incapacitate him.
"...!"
A shrill clanging sound enveloped the soundless night. With his sword raised, the man blocked both of Luke's knives. Luke gawked in surprise that his almost perfectly silent ambush had not just been seen through but also blocked, despite the swiftness of his blades. The man pushed the knives away with his sword and swung it around elegantly over his head, the sword drew a vertical arc over his head and transitioned beautifully into a horizontal one as it threatened to cut Luke in half. With a backward leap Luke dodged the strike, and landed on the street in front of the store. Whoever this was, was exceptionally skilled at close range combat.
Luke took a cautioned stance, ready to defend when necessary and charge whenever opportunity presented itself. The man walked out of the store's shadow with a flowing gait, and the moonlight graced his polished features with it's brilliance. He was given form before Luke's eyes, a well-groomed face with round amber eyes that glistened with innocence, short and shiny hair, flashy clothes striped in red and his sword's scabbard sticking to his waist. He was hardly the type of guy Luke would have expected to see in those ruins.
"Why do you ambush me? Name yourself."
A firm voice, young and lacking in gruffness.
Luke sheathed his knives, from that response it was made abundantly clear that this person had nothing to do with his attackers. Luke bowed as a sign of apology, "I'm sorry, I mistook you for one of the town's people, they started attacking me all of a sudden so I was a little on edge, my judgement was dulled."
To those words the man stared into the distance, "It's my first time hearing such a thing, I've never heard of them shunning anyone else… You… tell me. Who are you?"
"Luke Aleister. That being said, you hardly look like the kind of person who would be at a place like this, what's the story there?"
"Ah forgive me, I should have named myself first, I am the eldest son of the Eustache family, Jack Lysanias Eustache."
From his name and the way that he worded it, Luke could guess that he was of high status.
"You sounded like you know something about what's going on here, mind letting me in on it?"
"That is not the case, I have no idea why they would go after you. However… I know of their fanaticism so I am not entirely sure whether I should be surprised or not."
"I might have underestimated how extreme they could be with their beliefs."
"Did you break any of their rules?"
"No… at least I don't think so. I tried my best to abide by whatever was asked of me."
"That makes things even stranger. Why would they go to the lengths of hunting you down then?"
"Say, do you know of a way out of this town without getting caught?"
Jack shook his head in silence, "Believe me, I would have found it by now if a way like that existed."
"That means…"
"That is correct, they have always ostracized me as the devil, I am safe as long as I am in this ruined section of the town but even a step into their territory and arrows would rain on my head."
"..."
"You do not seem to have a place to spend the night, you can stay over at my house if you so wish."
"Thank you, then I'll take you up on that offer."
"Ah, just wait here for a second."
Jack walked into the abandoned shop and picked something up, as he emerged from the darkness, it revealed itself to be a jute sack, "Our dinner for the night."
--- --- ---
Luke doubted whether he had stumbled back into the main town… no, this was even more impressive than the town, for what lay before him was an extremely luxurious mansion, a red carpet welcomed him into it's premises, the place could never be mistaken to be a part of those decrepit ruins.
Jack bowed his head deeply in an impeccably courtly fashion, "As the eldest son of the Eustache family, I welcome you Mr. Luke Aleister, our twenty seventh guest in a decade."
"Is this supposed to be some sort of prank?"
"It's regretful that you would feel that way, I deeply apologize for the lack of a proper reception, however we are a tad understaffed at the moment so if you would-"
"No no no, that's not what I'm saying, in fact, it's the exact opposite, how did you even get that from what I said… You know what, just continue."
"If that is agreeable with you."
Luke was led inside and shown around, he was assigned a room where he spent some time admiring the magnificence of it all while Jack prepared the food.
Very soon, an equally magnificent table was laid out before Luke, the scraps of food and ingredients that Jack had picked up from random shops had at some point turned into a lavish feast.
As Luke sat dumbfounded, gawking at the scene, Jack munched on his food soundlessly, across the table.
Luke found all of this to be more strange than suspicious, if it was supposed to be a trap then it was completely pointless, since Jack's fighting prowess proved him to be someone capable of defeating Luke, there was no need for any underhanded tactics like in the case with the clubhouse from earlier.
Luke picked up the knife and fork set on both sides of his plate, plucked at the food and with the intent of killing the ugly suspicion still lurking in some corner of his heart, he cautiously but surely munched at the food, the juicy interior burst open into a rainbow of flavors which threatened to overwhelm his taste buds. If he had to describe the taste in one word, it would be 'expressive', the overall flavour hardly mattered, what mattered was that the flavour itself was not compromised during the process of cooking, but rather enhanced.
"I apologize for the lackluster meal. I would have prepared something worthy of a guest if I had known beforehand that one would be coming."
"Are you being serious? What about this looks 'lackluster' to you!?"
"..."
"You could probably give a fair competition to the best cooks in the world, this is genuinely delicious and well made."
A wry smile popped on Jack's face, "I appreciate that you feel that way…"
He did not seem to be entirely convinced. Luke heaved a sigh, Jack seemed to be the type that did not understand his own strengths, "You should think more highly of yourself you know. With those skills, it's absurd that you don't."
Jack shook his head but said nothing in response and just kept staring at the food. Luke made the gentlemanly decision to give him some time to think and honour his cooking by relishi- "You can only say that because you do not know me…"
"Huh?"
"..."
Luke cleared his throat and put the food back on the plate, "I don't need to know you to tell you that your cooking is impressive though? You're so good, I wouldn't doubt if it was your calling in life."
"I… have no calling in life, no reason to live, it is for the best."
"Why do you say that?"
"I am the devil the townsfolk fear, the ones who have purpose, someone like me who has none, only threatens to bring them down, hence I am ostracized."
"That town is just a bit too extreme. You don't have to give such value to their words. From where I stand, you are impressive, not just with cooking, your sword skills back there were no laughing matter either."
"These are just things I have a responsibility to be good at, as the eldest son, there's no merit of mine in there."
"I have been wondering, this mansion is huge and magnificent, it must take a lot of work to maintain, and yet I see no workers, no butlers, no maids, no servants, no anyone else. You seriously maintain all of this by yourself!?"
"I have the duty to see to the upkeep of the house."
"You are this good at so many things, you could probably be really successful if you were in the town."
"I am duty-bound to not go in there."
"Come on, duty this duty that, do you really enjoy these duties so much?"
"But these burdens are all I have. I must not be let free, not again…"
"Why is that? It's very clear that you wish to be freed of them."
"It does not matter what I wish for, all I have are duties to uphold, meaning could not exist for someone like me, it ought not exist… else the tragedy will only repeat."
Luke could understand Jack, he might be unmatched at most of everything, but those were his duties, he could see no colour in them. Luke hardly had any words of encouragement, and yet, "The moment you decide to have meaning, to do anything, you open yourself to the possibility of failure, you must go in accepting that. As someone who's still living, you deserve to give a purpose to that life. Even if it does not have one, even if everyone disagrees, you have the right to give yourself meaning."
Jack stared wide eyed, he was surprised, but so was Luke, he hardly planned on saying something that dramatic.
"But… it is for everyone's good that I do not."
"I don't know what happened in the past, nor do I plan to probe into it, but whatever happened was a possibility all along, you have to accept that if you wish to give yourself meaning. That's right, it was one of the numerous possibilities, you do not have to blame yourself for the whims of fate."
"I am not so sure about that, all the people of the town were assigned their roles in life by the goddess, yet I have never been given one, is it really possible for someone like me to find it? I highly doubt it."
"But it is!"
Jack was startled by the strength of those words.
Luke shot a determined glance at Jack, his eyes unflinching, "If you cannot believe it yourself then I shall prove it to you, you wouldn't be doubting after that, would you?"
Jack closed his eyes, thinking of a response, then a smile spread across his face, "I shall believe in your words then."
Despite the recent developments, the feast ended on a cheerful note.
Luke lay in his bed, feeling a tinge of regret for his irresponsible words, but there was nothing he could do about it, it was as if the words came flowing out on their own, now that he had promised something like that, how did he plan to follow up on it? He could think of nothing. Rolling around in the bed, writhing in lukewarm regret, Luke closed his eyes to the world.
--- --- ---
Jack greeted the morning with urgency, he was up on time, yet that was not enough today for he had to see to his guest's needs. He would usually train with his sword after freshening up, instead he went straight for the living quarters to check whether his guest was up yet, it was a host's duty to wake up before everyone else, he could not afford to compromise here.
The door to Luke's room creaked open, the room was lit up by the sunlight flitting through the curtains, it certainly felt like the same room that Jack was used to cleaning everyday, but that shouldn't have been the case, for today it was supposed to have been occupied by Luke. The empty bed however suggested otherwise.
Jack felt a sense of dread, he was late. He hurriedly shut the door and ran to the kitchen to whip up something good quickly so that he could cover for his mistake.
After a while, an alluring aroma wafted out of the kitchen, it guaranteed to capture the attention of anyone, hungry or not. As Jack laid out the plates on the table, he noticed that Luke had yet to arrive at the table, finding it a little off, he called out for Luke, but when no response came back, he decided to look for him.
With every nook and cranny of the mansion covered, Jack came back to Luke's room, confused. It did not make much sense, there was not a sign of habitation throughout the mansion. Jack plopped onto Luke's bed, was there actually ever any guest? He clenched the bedding with his hand, what if the events of last night were all a figment of his imagination, the comfort of having someone else share in and understand his pain and isolation, the encouraging words, the fun of spending time with another person, was all of it a desperate lie to escape the meaninglessness of his life.
The flame of hope that had been ignited in his heart the previous night, dimmed.
Was Luke a delusion just like the previous twenty six guests?
--- --- ---
The church door was wide open when Luke arrived, there was some kind of commotion going on inside, the quiet and serene atmosphere from the last day was all but gone. Several people stood near the altar, arguing about something. Luke walked inside to see what it was all about, and saw the trembling figure of Pansy, surrounded by an angry-looking group of people. They shouted and hurled insults at her, Luke could hardly stand to watch it, but somehow he felt it would be irresponsible to butt into the town's affairs without even knowing the full story, yet at the same time his indignation wouldn't let him stay doing nothing. As Luke decided on what to do, the harassment continued.
A pale faced man shouted at her, "How is it so hard to identify people? We all have our own unique identity, distinguishing us from the others, is it really so hard to remember them?"
A middle aged woman, standing beside him nodded, "Indeed, it's almost as if you don't acknowledge who we are."
"No! I-it's n-not like that. I certainly recognize the position given to you by the goddess.", Pansy stammered in protest.
"Then why don't you remember any of our names?"
"I-I do remember!"
"Oh? You remember our names? Then name every person in the town."
Luke could stand no longer, he marched to the altar, determined to speak his mind, but as he neared the crowd, sudden mantra-like words echoed through the church halls, making Luke stand still in his spot, as if bound by the magical words. The words emanated from near the altar, they did not mean anything when clubbed together, they held meaning only in isolation, still they were strung together in a meaningless mishmash. Those individual names lost their meaning as Pansy's mouth moved.
The people at the altar were stunned into silence, most of them were names that not even they knew. The possibility that Pansy was making them up on the spot crossed their mind, while that would indeed be hard to do, that was the only explanation they were willing to accept at that point. However after hearing the names of a few of their friends and acquaintances, they started to doubt that theory, after a few minutes, most of them had been named, if she had been spouting random names then it would have taken her a lot longer to hit upon their names.
All of them had been named, yet they stood there watching dumbfounded, finally someone gathered the courage to tell her to stop the endless mantra.
Pansy shook her head, "Please believe me, I do remember everyone's names, I can still continue."
"I-it's alright, you can s-stop. We believe you, we believe you."
One of them motioned uncomfortably for the door, "I-I better take my leave, I have to get to work."
"Y-yeah, me too."
With their harassment countered perfectly, they left the church one by one, by the end only Luke was left standing in front of the altar.
Pansy noticed him and bowed deeply, "Ah, welcome to Merkington Church. Is this your first time here?"
"No."
"I-is that so? Have I perhaps met you before? I'm so sorry if that's the case, I can't seem to remember you."
"You don't have to worry about that, I never told you my name to begin with, of course I don't expect you to know of it."
Pansy was a little surprised by those words, "Can I… get your name then? Please?"
Luke averted his eyes with his hands in his pockets, "I wonder if you can…"
Pansy caught the meaning behind Luke's words, and her lips curled into a smile, "I don't remember who you are, but would you care for some tea?"
"I definitely would."
Pansy brought some tea and the two of them sat at their usual spot, spending the time chatting.
"Would you mind telling me what that commotion was all about?", Luke said, while sipping on his tea.
"Ah, that… well, it's just, I am bad at remembering people, I couldn't even remember their names, so it makes sense that they would be mad."
"What? You really think that's a good reason to harass you?"
"Are you perhaps an outsider?"
"Yes, I am a traveler."
"Then it would make sense that you do not know about our culture."
Pansy sipped at her tea as she continued, "Though no one remembers it now, there was once a time when our people had lost all meaning, everything anchoring them to this world, and the reality that stood before them was one of tragedy. In such hopeless times, each of the town's residents was provided a purpose, a reason for their existence, they no longer existed just to suffer, they had a reason to brave their hardships, and the voice that gave them that purpose was our mother's."
Pansy looked up at the goddess statue, "and that's why, everyone holds their identities in high regard, it is something irreplaceable to them."
Her eyes wavered and she lowered her head, unable to look the statue in the eye, "I have been given the responsibility of a priestess, a bridge between the people and their goddess… but what good is a bridge that is unsteady? I cannot even value the one thing that people celebrate as their connection to the goddess, of course they would be dissatisfied."
An awkward silence descended upon them. Luke felt frustrated by his inability to say anything in response, but how could he though? What did he even understand about the town and it's residents? What did he understand about Pansy? He already had the pieces, and so with renewed resolve he picked them up.
Pansy couldn't remember the people but she remembered their names, that was what she had claimed. It was doubtful earlier how she could say with certainty that the names she remembered belonged to the concerned people, but if Luke took the incident from a few minutes ago into account… Luke's eyes widened, did she really remember the name of every single person in the town? Was that how she could say with certainty that she remembered someone's name even if she could not tell which one it was?
Luke turned to her with a bit of sweat dangling from his forehead, "I do doubt that this is the case, but… do you really know everyone's names?"
"Yes, I do. Please believe me."
"I mean… bu-but, if you can't remember the people, how can you remember their names so perfectly?"
"What I cannot seem to remember are human features, a person's name is a representation of that person, and not necessarily a human quality itself."
"That's a very specific kind of memory loss, but putting that aside, you seriously memorized every single name?"
Pansy pursed her lips, "You don't believe me do you?"
"N-no that's not it."
"Wait a moment."
She got up, picked up a notebook from the altar, and handed it to Luke.
Luke flipped it open and saw a huge list of words with some text presumably explaining the word, written beside them, almost like a dictionary. A closer inspection however, revealed to him, that the words were actually names, and the descriptions, were descriptions of people. Page after page, just noting down a person's name and their characteristics.
Pansy peered into the notebook from behind Luke, "I jotted down everyone's names and qualities in an attempt to remember them… but I still just can't seem to identify people."
It made sense that she would not be able to remember them with just a few defining features, a human is not so simple and predictable that she could ever recognize them, even if she jotted down all their traits. Unpredictability and complexity is what defines a human. Still the lengths she had gone to, to remember everyone, something which even normal people cannot do, was very impressive, and somehow a little sad.
She would always claim that the townspeople's efforts went unrewarded, so she had tried her hardest to memorize some traits to remember people by, but without a face to put those features against, they slipped out of her mind, therefore the one whose efforts went unrewarded was surely her.
Such is the human condition after all, people seek the meaning for things they don't understand. Something that lacks meaning becomes an enigma, on the contrary, if we only remove the subject, that said meaning is attributed to, it becomes an abstraction. She was surrounded by such abstractions, everyone was just a bunch of words on a page.
"You went through all that, just to…"
"It's alright, this is the least I can do to uphold my duties."
"But, how do you remember Mr. Ernst if you can't remember anyone else?"
"... and who might that be?"
"..."
"A-are you perhaps talking about the father?"
Luke nodded.
Pansy heaved a sigh, "I identify him by the church clothing he wears. I don't remember his face, his voice, or anything else… He is supposed to be someone very close to me, yet every time I meet him, it feels like I'm talking to a stranger… it-it's a strange feeling to say the least."
Luke's fingers quivered, his fingertips aching, he clenched them into a fist. Even if no one else understood her suffering, Luke knew in his heart that he did. He understood her isolation.
"You don't even remember the conversations he has with you?"
"That's right, however I need to remember his instructions to carry them out, so he leaves some letters on the altar for me to read. I don't forget the contents of the letters."
Pansy jolted up as if remembering something, "Ah! That's right! I was about to read the letter he left when the townspeople showed up."
She once again got up, picked up a letter from the altar, and sat down beside Luke.
Undoing the folded piece of paper, she laid it on her lap.
Luke got up and made to leave, "Perhaps I shouldn't be reading it."
"No, no. It's fine. It's not something I need to keep a secret."
She read out the contents of the letter.
'Pansy, you have been a little too uptight with the rules as of late and while that is commendable, you need to be easier with them, especially when it concerns the convenience of the people. Rules exist for a reason, judge carefully and make the decision yourself, whether they need to be protected or to be broken. You are no longer the apprentice nun you used to be, you shall soon become a full-fledged priestess. You must be on the side that makes the rules. I do hope you will come to understand that.'
Pansy sighed, "I just can't seem to do things right."
Luke was about to say something to dissuade her from that mindset, but before he could, a sharp sound rang out through the church halls, as Pansy slapped her face with both hands, "This is no good, I must be more confident in myself. There will come a time when my efforts bear fruit, I must endure for that day."
Luke smiled wryly, "You are a hard worker aren't you?"
Pansy needed to return to her duties, so their chatting concluded and she went to see him off at the church gate.
Pansy bowed, "Thank you for spending time with me today, Mr… um…"
Luke turned his head, "Traveler."
A bittersweet feeling washed over Pansy, and an involuntary smile formed on her face, "Mr. Traveler."
--- --- ---
Luke glanced here and there, searching for something as he ambled through the streets. He had asked a few people and they had directed him here, so it should have been somewhere around there.
Then he spotted it, a dome shaped building. It stood out among the other buildings, so it was easy to notice. Luke opened the door carefully and stepped inside, his world was enveloped by the dark brown of wooden shelves, with books of every colour adorning them, he walked through the space, entranced by the sight. The place had a sort of dated charm to it, the smell of wood and paper tickled at his senses, evoking a sense of serenity.
At the center of the space, a middle-aged woman sat on a chair, donned in an orange-black two-part dress, an open book lay on her lap, it's pages turning in the wind, yet she did nothing to stop it, she seemed to be lost in her own world. She sat slumped forward, her short navy blue hair fell on her face, covering half of it. As Luke drew closer, he noticed that her eyes were closed, her skin was fair, and her stature seemed to be of the same height as that of Luke. A strange dot of light was visible on her forehead.
Luke took a chair from nearby and sat on it, then focused on that one dot of light, the world grew distant, his vision blurred, his hearing dulled and soon he was separated from the reality that enveloped him.
The infinite blackness that had become his world, soon transitioned into an array of colors jetting across the landscape of his mind, the red of wrath, the yellow of greed, the green of envy, and so on. The colors represented abstract concepts given form, each carried with it, a thought. The spectrum of colors increased in intensity and variety as a dot of light became visible in the distance, the colors rushed towards that point of white, and Luke was pulled along.
For a moment, everything was enveloped in infinite whiteness, the curtain of white then faded to reveal black silhouettes standing around a stage of colors, the stage swayed and swirled, as if influenced by the mood of the audience, and upon it, stood two figures, one obscured by the same blackness as everyone else, but the other showing their true form to everyone, or perhaps only to Luke, for it was not possible for him to know the viewpoint of the rest of the audience.
"Is that all you got? With knowledge that pitiable, you decided to stand against the strongest person in Headscape?"
Her navy blue hair swayed from side to side, as tangible colors swirled around her, forming a gust of thoughts that shot at the man standing before her, he concentrated all his knowledge and formed a shield of colors, and yet it was shattered in a single hit, representing the complete annihilation of his claims.
A barrage of colourful arrows shot at the man, each one carrying a claim that could pulverize him. The man shielded and dodged with all his might, but flailing around with abstract thoughts could only take him so far, his unstable barriers swayed and broke, thoughts that were not complete could not hold their forms and so the absolute confidence the woman had in her claims translated into a peerless edge which penetrated the man, no blood was shed, all she had done, was defeat him in a battle of knowledge, the man slumped down on the stage and as he fell, an uproar seized the crowd.
Cheers and praise were sent her way, and as she stared at the crowd, unblinking, the stage dissolved into nothingness. Without so much as a word, she turned away from the crowd and disappeared. Luke concentrated his senses, and gradually but surely, he was returned to his reality.
As his eyes opened, he saw someone peering down at him, but in his delirium, he found it too hazy to make out.
"Wake up, young man. How long are you going to lie there?"
As his eyes adjusted to his surroundings, the figure of that woman became visible to him.
In his confusion, he blurted out, "Wha-?"
"What takes you so long to transition back?"
"..."
Her's was an elegance of the scholarly kind. She carried a book in one arm and twirled at her deep blue hair with the other. Luke stared dumbfounded, still unaware of what was going on.
The woman sighed, "This is getting us nowhere, let me catch you up on the situation then."
She spread one of her arms towards the shelves stacked with books, "You are at the Merkington Library.", her hand then settled on her chest, "and I, Salvia Lavendula am the librarian here."
"Oh… I am Luke."
"What reason do you have for being here?"
"I'm a traveller, I was just checking out the place, that's all."
"Secretive, aren't you?"
She plopped herself onto the chair, "You followed me to headscape, didn't you? What reason did you have for that?"
"There wasn't any particular reason, I just thought I'd check out what you were doing in there."
"People do not come here without a reason. You sought out what you did not know, is that not correct?"
"You could put it that way, I guess."
"That is the sole reason people come here. A thirst for knowledge."
"..."
"Very well, you may take your time with whatever it is you wish to read, I shall not pry further."
Luke nodded, and started to search for his desired book, but the number of shelves stacked with books was staggering, no matter how much he searched, he just could not seem to find it. Salvia who had been reading a book on her chair until then, looked up, "This is pitiful, is what you wish to search for really that embarrassing to talk about? What, are you searching for a guide on how to impress girls? You seem to be in need of one, because you certainly aren't impressing me with that loitering around you're doing."
Luke's brows stitched together into a frown, she seemed to be the sarcastic type, "It's not something that confidential, I can tell you if you want to know it that badly. Honestly, the one with the thirst for knowledge here seems to be you."
"Keep yapping young man, you won't get a reaction out of me. Whatever the case, what you are doing is the most wasteful use of time I have seen in my life."
"What do you mean?"
"If it is some sort of knowledge you seek from this library…", she pointed at her head, "Then all of it is already compiled in here."