Oh hell, nah! No way am I gonna do that.
You want there to be a murder case on school grounds.
The moment I saw that smile on her, I knew it.
If I don't do it, who knows what she's going to do next.
She's already exhausted most of my privacy time.
Hmm, now, who to choose?
HIM or HER?
That's a no brainer, HER of course.
So I held out my pinkie, trembling of course. With this, my end was edging nearer and nearer.
And it was witnessed right before poor Mitsuki's eyes.
The legendary PINKY PROMISE!
One problem though!
"Umm, Sakurai would you mind letting me go now?"
This bitc-!
Ahem.
Guess who wasn't letting go?
SHE was the one who had a tight hold of my pinkie!
SHE was the one who wasn't letting me go!
And now she blames it on me?
Is this her revenge for my revenge?
This isn't even a joke anymore, I'm dying soon!
I wanted to retort, but I knew doing that would make things worse.
…
But I couldn't do anything.
This was checkmate.
After seeing me suffering so much, she finally let go and I did not say anything after that.
I just left.
Leaving the two alone as they continued what they were doing.
Wish you the best of luck dude.
Now that I was walking back alone to the classroom, it was only about time when I would meet the grim reaper!
Not only Mitsuki, but most of the people if not everyone in the cafeteria noticed what happened.
I'm not over hyping her!
She's just that attractive and popular. Trust me.
Leaving me with one question. Why did she start wasting her time on me?
I know you must be thinking, cause she likes you duh, but I'm not too sure about that.
Well, no point in thinking about this.
After school…
"Hey sup."
I froze when I heard that voice. You thought I was making jokes huh? Well, jokes on me because my time is up.
Ahh! What a short boring unhealthy life this was.
Couldn't my life have been spared for just a single day more?
"Are you ignoring me dude?"
It was at that time that I finally willed the courage to force my head to look where the source of the sound was coming from.
And there that person was, HER!
I wish!
HIM!
Mitsuki. My overly brawn-brained life-long pal who is about to incite imminent death to me a couple of seconds into the future.
I know this guy is already intimidating as is but for some reason, today he looks different.
"Heeey….Mitsukiiiiii….my pallllllll, how're doinggggg?" I faked a smile.
"Drop it pal, you sound weird. Lets head home."
"Don't you have any clubs"
"Didn't feel like it today. I'm skipping."
"Is that so…" I said as finished packing my things.
I know what you want to ask.
Where are the other people?
How come they are not reacting to this?
Did they disappear?
And to answer that, yep. Yeah, they did.
Everyone has already headed home.
Sayumi was dragged around by her friends and since she couldn't neglect them too much, she had to comply.
And she is also the class rep so she must be busy.
Huh, why am I even talking about her?
Its like as if I was expecting something from her.
And don't get me talking about the reason why I am last, even I don't know how it happened so lets leave it at that, okay.
"Its still out of character for you to fetch me from school. And how did you know I was here."
"I tracked everyone at the school gate as I waited for you but I didn't find anyone who looks like you. So I just assumed you were in your class as I know you are too lazy to do anything."
Bruh!
"Is that so?"
"But since I've found you and we're alone now, I think its perfect."
"Hih!?!" I shrieked a bit.
Perfect. Perfect for what?
"You and Sayumi seem to be pretty close these days." He said whilst leaning on the window basking in the fresh air that wafted in.
I didn't realize the confrontation was going to occur this early. But what's there to hide anyway. I got nothing suspicious.
"I guess you can say that."
"Since when?"
"A little less than a week."
"What happened today really surprised me to be honest. Seeing you two bickering and chummy and all, it made me realize something."
Whoa! Bro is actually going full all out sentimental on me!
"You know what's funny," he continued, "it wasn't until a few days ago that I decided to reveal some truth about myself and told you about how I've liked someone for the first time in my life in that sort of way."
"Interesting fact, that very same week the chemistry between you and her seems to have spiked out of nowhere as if like it was fueled by my words."
"It's like the moment I told you about this you decided to do something right behind my back and the more I think about it, I still can't help but feel betrayed even right at this moment, I don't know what to think of this anymore."
"So I often ask myself, is that what having the hots for someone actually feels like. There's this certain ache that just seems to not go away which makes me just want to crush you right now."
"…"
"But then, through my conflict I also realized something else."
Oh, come on!
"Maybe I'm the one who has a problem. Maybe its just me. Maybe I'm the one who just pushed everything onto you just like that without even caring for how you feel on the matter."
Now you're feeling compassionate towards me. What about the hits I get everyday?
"So Sakurai, answer me this, honestly." he then faced me with the most serious expression I've ever seen him make my entire life.
"Do you like Sayumi?"
Good question, what do I think on the matter?
"I do." I replied honestly.
"But only as a friend." I lied through my teeth.
I lied through my teeth?
Huh!
I lied?
Why would I lie when it's true, it doesn't make any sense?
"If you are telling the truth, then why are looking to the left and not facing me properly. I've been your friend for more than a year now. And I know you cast your eyes slightly to the left when you're lying."
Didn't peg him for the observant type. That's new.
What, do I do that? Even I didn't know I lied like that! Huh! Am I even lying in the first place?
"As I said, I only see her as a friend. Nothing more."
"You did it again."
"But its true though."
"I'm trying to have a man-to-man conversation with you and you're still playing jokes. Do you think this is funny?"
"No, I'm not playing jokes. I truly mean it."
He had a perplexed face with a slight hint of anger written on his face as he was clearly observing me, which led me to come to a conclusion that I did that again.
Do I seriously like her?
That can't be possible.
Unless…
"I used to like her." My voice echoed through the whole classroom.
"What?"
"Yeah!"
To make sure I wasn't lying, the guy started observing me again.
How come I didn't realize the guy was like this sooner? I thought he was just brawns and muscles and all!
"But don't worry, it's all in the past now."
"What the hell do you mean?"
Sigh! I hate recounting my previous dumb actions but if it's going to help me resolve this issue then I have no choice.
"Long story short. I used to have those types of feelings for her so I decided to-"
"Decided to confess huh?"
"Yeah."
"But then, I was outright rejected on the spot without remorse. So now its kind of a thing of the past."
.
"So basically, what I'm trying to say is, I shot my shot and failed miserably. Even if we seem kind of close now, we'll never be more than what we are now."
For some inexplicable reason, saying these words hurts.
"Besides, you know these days who I'm fawning for?"
"Shizuki, is it?"
"Correct!"
That's a lie, I shot my shot too and this time it missed as well. Wait a minute, I think I'm the one who missed the ball?
That didn't come out right. No matter how much I think about it.
"What about Sayumi?"
"Who?"
"Do you still like her?"
"Well that's-"
Do I?
"No, I don't."
The guy once again was scrutinizing me very hard to the point where my guilty conscience was responding.
And what he found was…
"I see."
"Man, you got me worried for a sec there! I thought our friendship was going to end. Yeah, I believe you."
Phew!
At least that was resolved peacefully.
What he failed to notice was that although my hands were in my pockets, they were squeezed very tight to the point that I could feel my very small nails digging deep into my palm.
And I don't even want to think the real reason behind this or I'll be too disgusted with myself.
"Really? You were going to end our friendship just because of that?"
"Provided the circumstances I would."
DAMN!
"But whoa Sakurai, you really are amazing, aren't you?"
"Who? Me?"
"Yeah you."
"Despite being shut down twice, you just had to stand tall once again and pursuit another target. Makes me question how you fall so easily. I'm honestly surprised that Sayumi was on your list. It's like you never learn."
Except its three times!!!
"I don't understand. How does that make me amazing?"
"I figured out how amazing you were after having the hots for a girl."
Can't you just say you fell in love like a proper person?
"Expagorate further please."
"To tell you the truth, I don't even know how to look at her properly and the thought of being denied by the person you have hots for is enough to make me commit suicide. But seeing you standing like a normal person after those real life downfalls more than once is a majestic sight to behold."
I can't tell if he's being sarcastic or it's just a compliment.
"Phew." He exhaled loudly once again whilst still looking outside the damn window.
"Knowing you, you are probably going to confess to Shizuki, right?"
Congrats bro that was spot on. Except, I already did.
"Nah, this time I'm going to lay low."
"You lied again."
Weren't you looking out the damn window a moment ago?
"Oh did I?"
"Wish you the best of luck bro. Or, whatever that means."
"What about you?"
"I'm different from you. I'm going to do it when it seems right. You've taught me many things to not do."
What am I, your teacher?
"What did you say?"
"Well, since I've confirmed what I wanted to confirm, it's time we head home."
Whoa. I didn't even notice the time.
Of course, as we went home together, we parted midway.
"See ya tomorrow."
"Yeah, yeah."
When I returned home, I went straight to my bed as today was a mentally strenuous day for me.
And to think it was all because of a single person.
Despite my desire to leave all this love talk alone, it just keeps on haunting me as people keep bringing it back to me one way or another.
Spare me please.
Just how do I separate myself from all this?
It's just not my thing.