I had moved house. I was in the house in Kansas and I had slowly got myself together to deal with it, but I wasn't sleeping. I feared Damon, and very much so. He had tried to make the lesson one where he would have a fear reaction, what he could control, but being what I am, things don't always go his way.
Now I was understanding what Rebecca had been talking about. The bad side of Damon. The dark side. The side of without humanity. There had been rumors at the wedding, or I'd heard, of women telling horror stories of how Damon had tortured many women, including vampires, at one time or another.
Just as Damon had fucked those hundred virgins. I'd dissed the talk thinking that these women were jealous of me, but maybe they were trying to warn me that with Damon you should always behave. Damon had even killed people in his lessons. Now I knew.
And I committed myself to him forever. No wonder he had been happy. To be bound by a creature that can't die. To whom he could do whatever he pleased. Just take his humanity off and let it burn.
Was that to be my fate? To be a victim of Damon's torture. I didn't bother to speculate further because I can't see into the future. I wouldn't know if it was just a coincidence and if the women were telling the truth or not.
Damon was now in my mind all the time and not in the way he would like. My head was full of speculation and my own reflections. The only fact I knew was that I was so afraid of Damon that I had never been afraid of anything before. Never.
And no amount of reminiscing about our good times was going to help. It would not take the fear away at all. Because it was like a different man that had been with me, and somehow I didn't believe that the man actually existed, that it was just a shell. I did not know how fucking right I was.
I couldn't think about it all the time. I was concentrating on doing something else. However, there comes a time in life when we must confront our fears. Although it may seem tempting and secure to ignore reality and hope for the best. But it is not for me, never will. Maybe others can do it, but I can't ever.
Damon was ready. The gigs were done, and he'd done what he had to do again, as cruel as it felt, and Damon knew no one could ever understand him. He was on his way out to see Mimi and hoped he could do something.
Damon had called Magnum and Magnum promised to help. Somehow, he realized that Damon and Mimi belonged together and Damon regretted it. All people and creatures do things they regret, and Mimi has a really hard time recovering. Magnum knew that all too well. He could even smell it again, hear their pleas. He pushed the thought out of his mind. He wanted to help Mimi.
Although she had tried to act strong, even Magnum had seen Mimi's hands shaking or her lips almost trembling when they had talked about Damon. Magnum also knew that Mimi doesn't sleep and although Mimi might have been a little cranky with him for a while, Magnum was determined to act.
Magnum phoned me and said he was coming over, he had something to talk to me about, over coffee. I welcomed him and got on with my business. Magnum would have a key so he could let himself in.
I had actually bought this house and Magnum had been there, so I had given him the key. I had said nothing to Adam about it yet. I now wanted to put this house in order. This was a four-storey house, but there was a heap of building rights here and it was already big. This was a wonderful project for me to immerse myself.
I had baked and made some food in case Magnum got hungry. There I was, downstairs in one room where I was planning a greenhouse when I smelt him. Damon. I saw from the reflection in the window that he was standing in the doorway. There was only one door in the room, and Damon was standing in it. Now I couldn't escape. Fucking Magnum.
For a moment I thought about running out of the window, but fear froze me in place. I tried to hang on. Not die out of fear. I had done it too.
Damon came just a few steps closer and said, " Baby, I'm really sorry for what I did. Magnum showed me the video. I'm okay now. I had my humanity gone, too. I'm like that at the time. I didn't react too well to your velvet. I understand you don't want to have anything to do with me, but baby, please, say something."
His voice was calm but there was such clear desperation in it that cut my heart, but the terror and fear didn't loosen its merciless grip on my mind.
I swallowed and said in a quiet voice. "Damon, at the moment, I can't move. I'm paralyzed with terror. You made a big deal out of me. I've never been so afraid of anything in my life as I am of you. Please. Don't come any closer. I can't even look at you. Now I don't know if I ever will. Is there any more of us? I know I'm your vampire wife, but for now, I am barely hanging on that I will not jump right out the window."
Damon sighed. This was even worse, heartbreaking, and made his self-loathing spill all over the place.
Damon slipped into Mimi's mind. He was an existentially strong, if not powerful, telepath and that had been a great advantage in his day, but he didn't want to spy on other people's thoughts or get anyone's delusions in his head, so he controlled himself and kept his abilities hidden.
Part of that ability was that he could project fear and terror into the minds of his victims. It had once been his favorite trick. Especially if he was eating from a human. That the victim was absolutely terrified when he ate from them had given him a sense of power.
But he had gone to do it to Mimi and was still under the influence of the dental substances. He gave lessons and few survived. He recalled giving four painful lessons, even to Elena when he was occasionally fed up, but it was futile when Stefan aided and always erased it from Elena's mind.
He remembered the sound he made when he had broken Mimi's ribs. He remembered the feeling of it strengthening him. He hadn't done this out of malice, but out of rage. He'd just snapped out of his rage.
Colin had examined the substances found in the shed, and most of them were psychotropic. He'd sort of brainwashed Mimi into fearing him.
He felt a huge black ball of fear and terror in Mimi's mind. Damon knew he could get that ball out, but it would take time and he needed to be as close to Mimi as possible while restoring the sense of security he had taught his wife.
He had to act. He knew that this first contact was terrible, but necessary. He talked to Mimi and approached her. He had to do this even if it felt awful.
He went to wrap himself around Mimi and his soul almost broke when he smelled her pissing herself with fear. Self-loathing reared its head once again, but that would come later. He tightened his grip and bit down on the new anesthetic his teeth had just made. Mimi went limp in his arms.
Damon came closer and closer and spoke in a low voice.
"Mimi, now I will come and hold you. We will go to the bedroom and you will come into my arms again, clinging to me like you do every night. I will take that gigantic ball of fear and terror tangle it out of your mind at the same time. It will take time and you have to hold on, but this will help. I promise."
Damon was behind me and wrapped his arms around me. I felt my bladder empty with fear. The smell of my piss was clear. I had peed my pants when I was so scared. I was shaking all over and I couldn't do anything, not even move a muscle.
Damon soothed me, talking low, but I couldn't make out the words anymore as the terror rolled over me so hard. I felt him brush the hair from my neck. He was quick. He tightened his grip, sank his fangs into my veins, and let the substance drain out. It felt like satin and my knees were left under me and the world went black.
He carried Mimi into one bedroom and undressed. He walked over next to Mimi holding her tightly against him so that if she woke up, she couldn't escape but not in too uncomfortable a position. He untied the black ball in Mimi's mind, one strap at a time. When Mimi woke up, he would persistently continue to dismantle this horrible ball of fear. He had never seen such a ball in anyone's head.
Mimi was very unique, and he remembered how he had planned the fear was programmed only supposed to come on when he told it to, but it hadn't worked and he had just kept on torturing her, anyway.
When Mimi woke up, she was shaking. He spoke to Mimi in a low voice, kept his grip tight, and continued his work. Damon put the matter out of his mind and concentrated on the ball. It took time and patience to dismantle the ball, as Mimi almost built the ball back up faster than he could dismantle it.
Eventually, he had the whole ball out, and Mimi's shaking had finally stopped. Damon soothed his wife for a while longer. Soon he found Mimi relaxing completely and falling into a healing, deep sleep.
I woke up and remembered and smelled. I shook. I was paralyzed with fear and I couldn't do anything.
Damon held me close to him, and spoke in a low soothing voice, "Mimi, listen to my heartbeat, concentrate on the sound of it, just listen to it, don't think about anything else, it's all right, just listen. Take your time. Good girl. Everything's going to be all right. You're safe. I'll take care of you. There's nothing to be afraid of."
He kept going on and slowly the fear faded. It took a while, but it went away. I could focus on Damon's calming rhythm completely, and I was no longer shaking. I finally relaxed.
Here was a relief. This was safety. I was safe. All the fear and terror had gone out of my head. I was no longer afraid of Damon's passionfruit scent at all, but let it put me in a peaceful sleep. I was so damn tired.
Damon broke away from Mimi. He smiled coldly, left his phone and wallet on the bedside table, took the car keys, pulled another phone out of his pocket, and called Cindy, promising a good time and a good go.
He was now on the surface and it was time to hit the obstacles again to that love that was threatening to blossom, and what better way than to get the fuck machine going? He didn't care so much about fucking himself, but he knew how to manipulate the good one into this mode where he would fuck anyone he could catch, usually taking out his frustrations and now his conscience.
The evil one already knew how to manipulate the good one into doing exactly what was most damaging to their relationship. Now the couple wouldn't sanctify anything or buy a single sex nest for a while. Now it was his turn to be on the surface and it always gave him opportunities, to make his plans, to think about the future, and to enjoy. To grow stronger.