-Charlotte
There's this period when you're young where you've only just figured out what it means to be a person. You see people making jokes about it online, that time when you blink and think 'Hey, I'm myself!'. Sadly, I can't remember such an experience, but I do remember one thing.
At the tender age of six, I learned what it meant to hate another person.
Every year at my elementary school, each grade was required to take part in the science fair. Back then I was only in kindergarten so you'd expect some lackluster results wouldn't you? Maybe I tell my parents about it and they do all the work while I write one or two words on the poster. By the end, I don't learn a single thing, but I'm still rewarded with a good mark in the grade book.
You'd be wrong. I mean, you should've seen the way that they waved around in the first place. To me, it was like waving a carrot in front of a horse. The instant I got home I worked my ass off to get a prize in that damn competition.
A month later, the staff had placed every science fair project in the cafeteria, separated by grade level, to be viewed by the students. They called everyone down, class by class, to take a peek at all the amazing projects and wonderful experiments.
As we marched through the cafeteria, my heart was damn near in my throat. Just a few moments earlier, the boy in front of me nearly burst into tears after he'd found his project only got a participation award. Just like me, he'd poured his heart and soul into his project. The experiment he'd picked was odd but unique and his board was all handwritten. That's why his pain struck a chord with me. Even now, the image of him attempting to hold back his wails exists so vividly in my mind. The dark-skinned boy with messy, uncut black hair... Who was he? I feel as though I know his name...
While the projects were separated by grade level, they were ordered by last name. My last name, Toledo, meant that my project would be one of the ones at the end. Safe to say I was given more than enough time to stress over my placement.
Time has a way of slowing down at the most crucial moments. For me, I guess seeing my project's placement was one such moment.
'Bronze Award'
I did it. I got myself a medal. While it may not have been the golden first-place award that I'd been shooting for, I was still over the moon with excitement.
My school was a bit extra when it came to encouraging students and celebrating achievements, so they made giving out medals its own little ceremony on a different day.
That day when I got off the bus I ran that short way home. There wasn't a single thought in my mind, only the surging tidal wave of happiness rushing through my body.
But then when I got home my parents were already celebrating something. My older sister, age 13, had done something incredible. She'd won first place in the district for track and field.
The living room was decorated with balloons and streamers, a large "Congratulations" banner stretched across the wall. My sister stood in the center of the room, her usual beaming smile painted on her face, her medal glinting under the lights. My parents were fawning over her, taking pictures and praising her accomplishment.
They barely even noticed my existence at that moment. In my left hand, I clutched a small flyer.
'Come Support Your Child At The Science Fair Award Ceremony!'
It suddenly felt like a waste of time.
"Charlotte, isn't this great?" my mom finally noticed me, her eyes alight with excitement. "Your sister is amazing!"
"Yeah, she is... Hey, Mom, I've something to tell-"
I didn't even get the chance to speak, she just turned back around asking my sister all sorts of questions. My father was the same. Drowning her in their suffocating affection.
My parents had brought my sister a gift, a small silver watch. Once I saw it, I only had one thought.
'I wished it'd break.'
I went to my room and stared at that stupid flyer, the happiness it had once brought me now tainted.
Later that day, my sister walked into my room.
"Charlotte, we're gonna order pizza. It'll be here in thirty minutes so make sure you don't forget."
"Uh-huh."
"Something wrong? I ordered Meat Lovers with stuffed crust, just the way you like it. Personally, it's not my thing, but you seemed a little down so I wanted to cheer you up. By the way, what'd you want to tell Mom earlier?"
"...Nothing. It's not that important anyway."
She spoke so softly in that happy-go-lucky voice of hers. It sickened me.
"If you say so. Make sure you come down when the pizza gets here."
That day, at the tender age of six, I learned what it meant to hate another person. And that person was my sister.
-January 13th
Charlotte blinked, snapping back to the present. She'd felt a jolt from behind as she was walking down the sidewalk. A certain girl had thrown her arms around her sister in a warm hug.
"I've missed you, Char! It's been way too long."
"It's been like an hour at most."
"Hey, listen so on the way here I-!"
"Hold on, before you tell me all about that shouldn't we be going to our uncle's birthday party? We were supposed to leave nearly twenty minutes ago."
"Oh, you're totally right! I'll tell you when we're in the car!"